Imagine you are hosting a party. Your husband has lovingly baked a cake and brought it for the guests. But the design on the cake got disturbed, and you are furious. You do not wait until the guests are gone, but go ahead and criticize him in front of everybody.
Doesn’t that situation sound rude? Such incidents happen if we do not respect each other in a relationship; if a wife does not see the need to value her husband’s self-respect. You would not want such situations to happen in your life. And you can make sure they do not happen if you respect your husband.
MomJunction tells you how you can respect and admire your husband. Read on.
Why Should You Respect Your Husband?
The answer is simple: Husband and wife need to respect each other just like two adults do. The two are equals in a marriage. Men crave for respect and honor while women look for love, romance, and trust in a relationship (it does not mean they do not need respect).
Your respect for your husband will encourage him to fulfill his duties as the head of the family. He gains the confidence that he can measure up to your expectations and you are always there to support him.
The man of the house will not hesitate to take some crucial decisions as he knows that you will not demean him if things do not go the way they should.
On the other hand, if you tend to criticize your husband for every move he makes, he absolves of his responsibilities.
Here are some more reasons why you should respect your husband:
- He supports the family emotionally and financially.
- He is a hard-working person, who constantly strives to keep the family happy.
- Your husband is the role model for your kids.
- He loves you unconditionally and stays beside you during hard times.
- He trusts you and comes to you with any problems he has professionally or personally.
- Your respect acknowledges his qualities as your husband and a father to your kids.
- Your respect motivates him, and he tends to love you even more.
So, convinced that respect could do wonders to your relationship with him? Then you might want to know how you can show respect to your partner.
13 Ways You Can Respect Your Husband:
Here are some simple ways in which you can respect to your husband. Tick and see if you are already doing them:
1. Seek his advice:
Involve your husband in your decision-making process, and he will feel valued. Show him that you value his suggestions and opinions but do not force him to take decisions for you. For example, he need not have to decide the lunch or dinner menus every day, or choose the dresses and shoes for you. Let the discussions be on more important topics such as the finances of the family, children’s education, and the like.
2. Remember his preferences:
When you take his advice, remember his choices so that the next time you know what he wants. Also, understand his tastes. For instance, if he is in for automation of work at home, you know that he would like you to buy home appliances.
3. Compliment him:
When having a discussion with a group of friends and family members, do talk about your husband’s good qualities. However, this does not mean that you have to obnoxiously brag about him to annoy the other people in the group or embarrass your husband.
A sincere compliment will go a long way in strengthening your marital bond, and your husband will feel appreciated.
Also make sure to praise your husband in front of your children, as he is their role model and they look up to him for guidance.
4. Understand his job:
Take an interest in your husband’s career and professional duties. Men feel frustrated if their wives do not respect their skills, talents, and abilities.
Be a source of motivation so that he comes to you for solace on tough days.
Your constant criticism and negative comments on his career and professional life can hamper his self-esteem.
If you see him disturbed, have a friendly conversation to know more about his job but do not bombard him questions.
5. Be open-minded:
Be open to your husband’s ideas and opinions. Do not brush aside his suggestions, as it will discourage him from getting involved in your life.
However, do not blindly follow his advice. Evaluate before implementing them.
6. Be oral about your admiration:
Never hide your admiration for him. You might admire him but it is of no use if you do not let him know about it. Your husband will love your token of appreciation and feel all his hard work justified. Your husband seeks your affirmation and appreciation to motivate himself.
7. Support his goals:
Your encouragement or lack of it can make or break his goals. Your support will have a positive effect on his determination to meet the goals, be it professional or otherwise. Also, his growth means your growth as it benefits you and your kids too.
In the absence of your support, your husband might lack the zeal to succeed in his life.
8. Seek his forgiveness:
You may be wrong in your decisions or deeds sometimes. You may inadvertently hurt your husband with the choice of your words. Rather than overlooking the situation, be thoughtful and apologize to your husband.
The best way to end marital conflicts is one of you to say sorry. Your apology will show that you have accepted your fault and will make sure not to repeat it.
9. Listen to him:
When your husband wants to have a conversation with you, give him your full attention.
If you are busy watching television, doing chores or looking after children, take some time off to have a peaceful personal interaction with him.
Do not interrupt him to share your opinion. Let him complete before you draw a conclusion and advice him.
10. Do not criticize your husband in front of others:
This is the worst thing you can do to disrespect your husband. No matter what your husband must have done, you have no right to insult him in public. Talk to him privately to explain where he went wrong and what he could have done. But, yelling at him in front of your kids, the family or the friends in not the right way to deal with the situation.
11. Don’t expect him to be perfect:
None of us is perfect. You are not perfect, and so is your husband. You will be unreasonable if you expect him to do things perfectly always. Understand and accept his weaknesses. If he is forgetful about switching off the lights in the bathroom, do not nag him. You know it is his habit to forget the lights, let him know softly that he may remember switching them off the next time.
12. Think before you speak:
Weigh your words. Yes, this holds good even when you are talking with your husband. Choose your words carefully, and check if any of the words that you use are harsh and hurtful.
13. Talk well about him to your children:
Your children will respect their dad if you respect your husband. Tell them good things about their dad, tell them how he struggles day and night to see them happy. If your kids are upset about their father, they will look up to you for guidance. Support your husband so that your kids will know that he is right.
Sometimes, your husband may annoy you, and offend you, but you need to be calm and positive. Try to handle the situations maturely and find effective solutions to resolve the conflict.
How To Admire Your Husband:
Action speaks louder than words, and if you can express your admiration and respect through your actions, your husband will love you unconditionally. Here are some simple ways in which you can show your admiration to him:
1. Stay positive:
Look at things with a positive mindset. Appreciate your husband’s hard work and struggle to keep the family happy. Life is not always smooth. Your positivity will help the family sail through the difficult days.
2. Respect his opinion:
Imagine, you ask for his opinion but when he gives, you criticize his views and preferences. That will shut him down and the next time you approach him for his views, he will not speak his mind. Work on his advice and let him know it really matters to you. He will feel important.
3. Appreciate his ideas:
Allow him to speak about his ideas. Do not interrupt him with your opinions or laugh at his thoughts. Admire him for the way he has been thinking about your family’s good or the growth of your kids. Tell him that you understand his feelings for the family.
4. Do not nag:
Your husband is a mature man, so do not try to treat him like a kid. Give him his personal space so that he enjoys his freedom and can take his decisions independently.
5. Be thankful:
Never take your husband for granted. Thank him for who he is and tell him how much you appreciate him. Be it big or small, a ‘thank you’ will take your relationship a long way.
6. Smile at him:
Smiles spread happiness in life, and it can make your relationship stronger. Open the door with a smile when he comes home, answer his queries with a smile, and deal with the situations with a big smile. That will spread positivity around you both.
7. Show your love physically:
If he has achieved a performance award in office, hug him. If he has helped your child win a race in school, kiss and thank him for his support. Make him feel important with your touch.
8. Be mindful of your tone:
While communicating with your husband, be mindful of your tone and expression, especially when you are arguing. Do not be rude however annoying he might sound. Most importantly, do not shout because by yelling at him you are escalating the situation. What is worse is that you are setting a wrong example to your children.
9. Discuss parenting:
Acknowledge your husband’s role in your children’s parenting and education. Consider his ideas and opinion because his way of thinking could be different from yours and you could get new insights into the problem by discussing it with him.
You may be doing everything possible to respect your husband. But sometimes things may not work out well. Is it because you are sounding disrespectful someway? Find out here.
Signs You Are Disrespectful To Your Husband:
Respect is the basis for a healthy relationship. When your husband constantly feels that he is disrespected, it can often lead to resentment. Here are some signs you are disrespectful to your husband:
1. You do not listen to your husband:
Listening and paying importance to your husband’s opinions is a fundamental sign of respect. The partners should be able to share their thoughts with each other without hesitation. If you refuse to pay attention to your husband and constantly interrupt him, it’s a sign of disrespect.
2. You criticize his parents:
Though you may have difficulty to adjust with your in-laws, you should realize that they are your husband’s parents. He could grow up so well and meet your expectations because his parents supported him throughout his life. You should respect them just like you expect your husband to respect your parents. The feelings are mutual.
3. You are sounding hurtful:
Your husband brings you a surprise gift but you are disappointed that it is not to your liking. You tell him to his face that he never understood your tastes, and he never bothered to know what you want. This will put him off, and he would hesitate to buy any gifts for you in the future. He might as well prefer you to do your shopping.
A harsh tone, rude language or hurtful words are all signs that you are disrespecting your husband. Mind your words lest they make your bonding bitter.
Respect to each other is the foundation for any relationship. And a marriage is no exception. When you respect your husband, he will reciprocate it. Imagine a family where the members have mutual respect, talk to each other with a smile on their face, and handle the problems without shouting at or blaming each other. And that family could be yours.
What are your views on respect in marriage? Let us know in the comments section.
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