15 Signs Of An Alpha Male And Tips To Be Like Him

An alpha male is dominant and influential. He holds the top position in the social status hierarchy with great power and money. Also, he has a command over others in a group setting. Alpha males attract women by their charismatic masculine personalities. They are the leaders and gain followers with their confident, extroverted and adventurous nature.

In This Article

What Is An Alpha Male?

An alpha male is dominant and influential. He holds the top position in the social status hierarchy with great power and money. Also, he has a command over others in a group setting. Alpha males attract women by their charismatic personalities. They are the leaders and gain followers with their confident, extroverted nature.

In earlier times, the alpha male was regarded as a loud, arrogant, and macho man. Aggressiveness and controlling behavior were considered his traits, and he was supposed to be an egocentric bully. However, in modern times, the characteristics assigned to an alpha male have evolved.

15 Characteristics And Traits Of An Alpha Male

Given below are a few characteristics of a true 21st-century alpha male.

1. He faces challenges head-on

Alpha males bravely face every challenge life throws at them. In fact, they thrive when life throws them a curveball. They conquer their fears and insecurities and overcome all the obstacles. Even when the stakes are high, they don’t stand down but strive. Failures are part of their life, too, but they never get bogged down by them. They dust themselves off and try again.

2. He makes tough decisions

An alpha male has the ability to make bold decisions in high-pressure situations. He assesses the situation and decides the right thing to do. Once the decision is made, he doesn’t agonize over it. He shows confidence in his judgment and avoids second-guessing himself.

3. He is humble

Alpha male is humble

Image: IStock

Alpha men might reach new heights of success, but their feet are firmly on the ground. They feel happy about their achievements but are not arrogant about them. Bragging about their accomplishments is not their style. They are self-assured and don’t need validation from others.

4. He is fiercely determined

Alpha men are go-getters. They work persistently towards their goals and never back down. Even if they stumble along the way, they are defiant and get up and keep going. Quitting is not a part of their vocabulary. If they believe in something, they fight against all odds to find a way and remain motivated.

protip_icon Did you know?
Alpha males love to take the lead in their relationships. They are incredibly loyal and committed to their companions.

5. He is a thorough gentleman

An alpha male is a thorough gentleman. He has a deep respect for women and appreciates them. It’s in his nature to open doors, pull out chairs, give his seat to a woman, and see her to the door after a date. He listens when the woman is speaking and never cuts her off mid-sentence.

6. He is a natural leader

Alpha males are natural leaders. They are authoritative and take charge of the situation by leading from the front. People are inspired by them and tend to follow them. Alpha men generally occupy senior executive-level positions in top companies because of their leadership qualities. They empower people and work with them to achieve success.

7. He is aware of his flaws

A man is not just defined by his strengths but also by the way he handles his weaknesses. Alpha men know their weaknesses well. They do not try to hide them in any manner. Flaws do not handicap them; instead, they work towards overcoming them. Alpha men are known for turning their weaknesses into strengths.

8. He is physically and mentally strong

He always keeps his cool

Image: IStock

Health is wealth — Alpha men know this adage well and take utmost care of their health. They keep their body fit by working out and eating healthy. Their fitness is not limited just to their body; they are mentally strong as well. They keep their cool even in high-pressure situations.

9. He is honest and upfront

Alpha men are pretty upfront. This doesn’t mean they are deliberately hurtful; they call a spade a spade even if it is painful. They are not afraid to tell the truth, even in the most tricky situations, and are strong enough to face the consequences. Alpha men believe in honesty and accept their mistakes even if it paints them in a less than favorable light.

10. He manages his emotions well

You need to have a good degree of emotional intelligence to connect well with people. Alpha men manage their emotions exceptionally well. In an emotionally charged situation, they think rationally instead of giving in to emotional outbursts. They are good at reading people’s emotions and diffusing volatile situations by showing empathy.

11. He is clear about his goals

Alpha men are competitive and ambitious about what they want in life. They work hard to achieve the goals they have set for themselves in their professional or personal lives. They make every decision and every move keeping the end purpose in mind. You will never find them living a purposeless life.

12. He is particular about his appearance and posture

Well-groomed people make a great first impression. Alpha men are very particular about how they present themselves. They maintain personal hygiene, wear good clothes, and make sure they look their best. They are confident individuals and use their swaggering body language to their advantage. Standing straight, keeping the chin up, proper eye contact, firm handshake — these come naturally to the alpha male while interacting with people.

Anna M. Valerie, a blogger, recounts how she fell in love with an alpha male and what characteristics of his personality attracted her to him. She says, “Here I am. I’ve fallen in love with an alpha male. He is tall, unfairly handsome, with a voice so deep that it makes others sound like tinkling cutlery. People listen to him. He is effortlessly easy and likable in the way someone is when they have no anxiety about trying to make an impression; he doesn’t need to try (i).”

13. He is protective of loved ones

He cares about people close to him

Image: Shutterstock

Real alpha men are not controlling but are fiercely protective of their loved ones. They care about people close to them and do everything in their power to keep these people safe. They don’t enjoy fights but seeing their dear ones in pain and at risk might bring out their aggressive side.

14. He has strong communication skills

Alpha men are good with people. They share interesting stories and keep their audience thoroughly entertained. Their innate charisma pulls people in, and they speak with confidence and assertiveness, gaining people’s trust. They also speak transparently and listen with interest when others talk.

15. He has a great sense of humor

One of the biggest strengths of an alpha male is his sense of humor. He doesn’t get offended if people make fun of him. Instead, he spins the situation in his favor by laughing at himself. He can make light of even his most humiliating failure because he considers it a learning experience. A silly joke has no effect on his sense of self-worth — he takes it in his stride and wins the hearts of even his detractors.

What Type of Woman Is an Alpha Male Attracted To?

Alpha males are attracted to a certain type of woman with specific qualities:

  1. Highly feminine: Alpha males are drawn to women who embrace their femininity. Women with strong masculine energy may not appeal to them.
  2. Free-spirited and grounded: Alpha males like free-spirited women who lead fulfilling lives rather than those with a conventional lifestyle.
  3. Effortlessly confident: Confidence is a turn-on for alpha males. They are drawn to women who are confident, know what they want, and fearlessly pursue their goals.
  4. Intelligent: Alpha males find intelligence attractive. They value women who can engage in intelligent conversations, both one-on-one and in social settings.
  5. Independent: Alpha males are attracted to an independent woman who is self-assured and not reliant on others.
  6. Supportive: Alpha males are ambitious and focused on their goals. They are naturally drawn to women who are supportive and encouraging, and act as their cheerleaders.
  7. Altruistic: Alpha males value altruism and appreciate women who are committed to serving the community and important causes.
  8. Nurturing: Alpha males are attracted to women who are loving, caring, and compassionate. They seek a motherly figure in their partner who will stand by them through thick and thin.

Alpha Males Vs. Beta Males

Beta males are considered to be quintessential nice guys. They are emotional and down to earth. Here is how alpha men are different from beta men.

  • Confidence: Alpha men ooze confidence. They have an unshakeable belief in themselves. Beta men, too, have confidence, but they tend to doubt themselves at times — they can be shy and nervous in their social interactions.
  • Self-esteem: Alpha men have high self-esteem and believe in themselves. In contrast, beta males tend to seek approval from others and can get insecure.
  • Personality: Alpha males are outgoing and social creatures. Beta males, on the other hand, are introverts who like to keep to themselves.
  • Leadership: Alpha men are strong independent leaders who can never follow others. In contrast, beta men are more comfortable following others. Hence, a beta man is more likely to let his partner take the upper hand in a relationship.
  • Relationships: Because of their lack of initiative and neutral behavior, some women tend to friendzone beta males. Some women are attracted to the noble charisma and sexual magnetism of the alpha, while others prefer the quiet and supportive beta male.
Women are attracted to the charisma of the alpha male

Image: IStock

  • Decision making: Alpha males are good at making decisions. Even in difficult situations, they can make decisions without fear or doubt. Beta males may harbor self-doubt, which can occasionally make it difficult for them to make quick and firm decisions.
  • Focus: Alpha males are entirely focused on what they want in life. They generally prioritize themselves above everyone else. Sometimes, this presumptuous behavior might come across as selfish. In contrast, beta males are thoughtful. They care about others and try to help. Often, they put the needs of other people before their own.
  • Influence: Alpha males don’t get influenced by other people easily. They don’t care what others think about them and move ahead confidently. However, beta males are influenced by the opinion of others. They sometimes let people dictate what they should do in life. As a result, they can lose sight of their own goals.
  • Nature: Alpha males can be headstrong and can seem aggressive at times. They can also be domineering at times. In contrast, beta males are soft and sweet.
  • Expressing emotions: Alpha males have iron-clad control over their emotions. They don’t show them easily. On the other hand, beta males are sensitive and are not afraid to express their emotions.
protip_icon Point to consider
The beta male desires a powerful partner who respects him and his views without compromising on their own strong convictions.

How To Be An Alpha Male In A Relationship?

Being a true alpha male in any relationship can help you build a healthy and lasting connection. Here are some tips to help you become an alpha male in a relationship.

  • Have a life beyond the relationship

It is a great thing to find the woman of your dreams. But if your entire life revolves around her, causing you to lose your identity, it is not healthy. You are more than just a partner to someone. To be an alpha male, you need to have a life outside the relationship as well. Take out some time to follow your interests or learn something new.

When in a relationship, you develop many mutual friends; however, it is vital to have your own set of friends. Find time to catch up with them and also spend some time with yourself to sort your thoughts and feelings. Meet up with your family regularly. All these things will help you in maintaining a sense of self and allow you to keep growing.

  • Don’t lose sight of your true goal

An alpha male never loses focus from his goal. A relationship is important to him, but he has a purpose beyond her too. It can be materialistic, personal growth, family-related, or spiritual. If you wish to be an alpha male, you need to keep your eyes on the prize. Your entire life’s purpose cannot be just about being with her. She can be an integral part of your life but not your whole life. Set a goal in life and continue to make efforts towards fulfilling it.

  • Take care of your physical health

Alpha men have control over their bodies. They put in efforts to discipline it and be fit. To be a true alpha, you don’t have to show off any special physical prowess; Be in your peak physical shape. A strong body will help you exude power and confidence. You will feel good about yourself and make the woman in your life happy.

  • Uphold your self-respect
Uphold your self-respect

Image: Shutterstock

It is essential to value your self-respect. Do not allow anyone to disrespect you. If your partner tries to walk all over you or take advantage of you, put a stop to it. Take a stand for yourself, and don’t allow anyone to control or manipulate you. If you respect and value yourself, you will command respect.

  • Lead from the front

If you plan to be an alpha, you need to show leadership qualities. Take initiatives. Arrange a date or an outing. Decide where to take your girlfriend out. Plan a surprise for her. Develop the ability to make firm decisions in the relationship without any self-doubt. Your girlfriend will appreciate this display of chivalrous leadership.

  • Learn to control your mind and emotions

When you and your partner don’t see eye to eye on something, it is crucial to keep your cool and handle the situation calmly without falling prey to your emotions. Any type of anger or aggressive dominance can harm the relationship.

Frequently Asked Questions

1. Are all women attracted to alpha males?

An alpha male is an honest and upfront individual who is humble but not weak. He takes on challenges and leads from the front. His confident appearance, physical strength, and protective nature can attract a woman to him. Yet, this doesn’t mean that women only get attracted to alpha males. They may be the most desirable, but every woman is different, and so are her desires for a Mr. perfect!

2. Do alpha males flirt?

When an alpha male fixes his eye on a woman, he will do anything to win her over. He will flirt effortlessly and give a glimpse of his emotions without hesitation. Showcasing his masculinity and dominance are usually his ways of bringing his lady’s attention to him. However, he will always ensure to be respectful, humble, and protective of a woman he likes or loves.

3. Is the concept of an alpha male scientifically supported?

The concept of an “alpha male” originated from observations of social hierarchies in captive wolf packs. However, subsequent research has challenged and refuted the notion that wolves or other social animals have a rigid dominance hierarchy led by an “alpha.” Moreover, the concept of alpha males in human social contexts is even less scientifically supported, as human behavior is complex and is often influenced by various factors such as culture, individual differences, and context.

4. Is there a difference between an alpha male and a dominant male?

The terms alpha male and dominant male are often used interchangeably. Alpha males show strong characteristics and have a high status in a group, often leading and influencing others. They are known for being confident, assertive, and competitive. In contrast, the term dominant male has broader interpretations and may encompass individuals who assert control in several contexts, such as relationships, social groups, or workplaces. They express dominance differently, from physical strength and assertiveness to intellectual or emotional influence.

5. Why is dating an alpha male hard?

Dating alpha males can be challenging for several reasons. Alpha males may have a desire for control and a tendency to prioritize their needs and goals, which can create power imbalances, especially if both partners have strong personalities. They may struggle to communicate emotions, making their partners feel emotionally disconnected. Moreover, alpha males may have high expectations for themselves and those around them, leading to feelings of inadequacy.

An alpha male bravely faces every challenge that comes his way and doesn’t shy away from making tough decisions in difficult situations. His fierce determination, natural leadership skills, and mental stability enable him to manage his emotions well and achieve the goals he sets. These unmatched qualities make him an exemplary and inspiring personality. While several qualities of an alpha male are innate, you can imbibe them with practice. With consistent efforts and the right approach, you can be the alpha male you desire.

Infographic: The Other Male Archetypes

Now that you know about the alpha male personality type, there are four other significant types of male personalities. We have prepared the following infographic to give you more information about these archetypes. Give it a read and save it to refer to later.

the archetypes of male personality (infographic)

Illustration: Momjunction Design Team

Key Pointers

  • Alpha males are strong, determined, and clear about their goals.
  • With their innate charm, they face little difficulty attracting women.
  • Unlike beta men, alpha men have a magnanimous personality, are highly confident, and make the right decisions.
alpha male_illustration

Image: Stable Diffusion/MomJunction Design Team

In this intriguing video, explore the traits that define an alpha male. Uncover the ten telltale signs that may indicate characteristics of an alpha male

Personal Experience: Source

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Donna Murphy

Donna MurphyBSW, MSW, RSW Cert. Ad.Ed

Donna Murphy is a social worker and operates a private practice in Calgary, Alberta, Canada. In her 15 years of experience, she has seen individuals and couples transform their lives when they begin to make changes within.
Read full bio of Donna Murphy