300+ Best Dad Jokes That Will Make You Laugh Out Loud

Jokes about dad carry unique humor. These puns might not be intelligent and can be silly as their purpose is to make everyone laugh. However, it does not mean that you are teasing or making fun of your fathers. You can also share some hilarious or comedic moments with your dad and enjoy a good chuckle with your loved ones.

Our post brings a collection of some dad-related jokes that you can share with your father and other family members and have a lovely time.

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300+ Greatest Dad Jokes Of All Time

These corny dad wisecracks are just what you need to share with your father and spark a guffaw.

Corny Dad Jokes

These corny dad jokes are just what you need to share with your father and make him laugh.

1. Name the thing that has a head, foot, and four legs. A bed

2. What are two octopuses that look the same called? Itenticle

3. Never write with a broken pencil because it is pointless.

4. What is the way to weigh millennials? Instagram.

5. The wedding arrangements were amazing. The cake was also in tiers.

6. Which state in the USA is known for small soft drinks? Minnesota.

7. Name the patriotic sport? Flag football.

8. I am so amazing at sleeping that I can do it with closed eyes.

I can do it with closed eyes.
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Image: IStock

9. Why is it that the bicycle could not stand up by itself? Because it is two-tired.

10. When a child denies taking a nap, will he be held guilty of resisting rest?

11. I know lots of jokes about retired people, but apparently, none of them work.

12. Why do dads tell such bad jokes? Because they want you to groan up.

13. I wish corona started in Las Vegas as what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.

14. Spiders are so smart that they can look for anything on the web.

15. The stadium got hot after the game as the fans had left.

16. To make hens meet, I was running a dating service for the chickens.

17. Within no time, the detectives found out the murder weapon. It was a briefcase.

18. Why do pops carry an extra pair of socks while playing golf? Because in case they get a hole in one.

19. Working at the sole-recycling shop was sole destroying.

20. I will find the one who stole my copy of Microsoft Office. You have my Word.

21. My boss asked to have a good day. So I went home.

22. I had plans to go on an all-almond, but they are just nuts.

23. If you have seen a robbery taking place at an Apple Store, you will be an iWitness.

24. When I fell in love while doing a backflip, I was heels over head.

25. My girlfriend asked me to stop acting like a flamingo. I had to put down my foot.

26. Timex and Rolex are the names of my watch dogs.

27. Seven out of six people agree that they are pathetic at fractions.

28. Have you heard about the Italian chef who just died? He pasta way.

29. Difference between denominator and numerator is a short line.

30. I was complimented for my parking. Someone left a note saying ‘parking fine.’

31. I was charged nine dollars extra at a hotel for the air conditioner. It was seriously uncool.

32. It is wrong when people say that age is just a number. It is a word.

33. I asked my date to see me at the gym, but she did not arrive. It looks like the two of us are not going to work out.

34. My doctor just told me that I am slowly going deaf. It was hard for me to hear that.

35. If an English tutor convicted of a crime does not complete the sentence, is it called a fragment?

36. While playing chess with my friend, we thought of making it interesting. We stopped playing it.

37. What is the favorite food of the scholars? Academia nuts.

38. When does a joke transform into a dad joke? It is when it finally becomes apparent.

39. I got attacked with a Diet Coke can in the head, but it did not hurt as it was a soft drink.

40. Raisin had to go out with the prune because he could not find a prune.

41. Rotation of the earth makes my day.

42. My children told me that they wish to invent a pencil with erasers on both sides. I don’t see the point.

43. Why do pumpkins always sit on the porch? As they don’t have hands to knock.

Pumpkins on the porch joke
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Image: IStock

44. When you don’t pay your exorcist, you get repossessed.

45. My friend wishes to become an archaeologist. I am worried his life will be in ruins.

46. Which word ends with ‘nions’ and starts with ‘O’ and can make you cry sometimes? Opinion.

47. My friend birthed her baby in her car, and so her husband named the child Carson.

48. What do you call someone with no nose and nobody? Nobody knows.

49. Do you know what you call birds that stay close together? Velcrows.

50. Ever wondered why the duck toppled onto the sidewalk? It had a little mishap with a quack.

51. Wondering how birds figure out flying? Well, they simply wing it.

52. Did you catch wind of the ice cream truck mishap? It had a rocky encounter.

53. Curious about the bird that pitches in at the construction site? It’s the crane.

54. Overheard one elevator telling another, “I think I’m feeling a bit low today.”

55. Want to know what the hamburger named its baby? It went with Patty.

56. Ever wondered about the kind of music planets groove to? They’re into Neptunes.

57. Why did the phone start wearing glasses? Because it lost all its contacts.

58. Have you ever thought about why bakers toil so hard? It’s because they really knead that dough.

59. Why is it a breeze to weigh fish? Because they come equipped with their very own set of scales.

60. What’s the title for a priest turned lawyer? A father-in-law.

61. What’s the ideal gift for a scientist with not-so-fresh breath? Experi-mints, of course.

62. What were Benjamin Franklin’s words upon discovering electricity? Absolute silence – he was utterly shocked.

63. How do you describe a lamp from the medieval era? A knight light.

64. What did one hat suggest to its companion? “You lead the way.”

65. Why did the frog opt for the bus for the daily commute? Because his car had turned into a toad.

66. Why do dragons catch some Z’s during the day? They do it because they’re eager to take on knights.

67. Have you heard the story of the 12-inch dog? It measured up to being a foot long.

68. What led to the baseball player’s arrest? He swiped third base.

69. What was the message between the two pieces of tape? ‘Let’s stay stuck together,’ one said to the other.

70. Why did six get scared of seven? Because seven ate nine.

71. Have you ever wondered why other shapes avoid talking to circles? Well, there’s just no point.

72. Why did the tomato turn red? It caught a glimpse of salad dressing.

73. Why did the skeleton decide to quit her job? She didn’t have her heart in it anymore.

74. What did the baby corn ask its mama corn? ‘Where can we find popcorn?’

75. Do you know which dinosaur had an impressive vocabulary? It was the thesaurus.

76. Ever wondered what Olympic sprinters eat before a race? Well, nothing at all; they choose to fast.

77. How can you tell when a vampire catches a cold? She starts using the coffin.

78. Why was the mushroom the life of the party? Because it was a real fungi.

79. After cracking a joke, the flower chimed in, “I was only teasing, just pollen your leg.”

80.When it comes to picking players for soccer, Cinderella’s never the choice – she’s got a knack for running away from the ball.

81. Wondering where Will Smith went in the snow? Just keep an eye out for his fresh prints.

82. Ever wondered how a hurricane perceives the world? It peers through a single eye.

83. Curious if you can crack dad jokes without kids? Absolutely, as long as you’re a faux pa.

84. Do you know what a computer loves to munch on? Computer chips, of course!

85. Trusting atoms is tricky business – they’re the ones that compose everything around us.

86. The limestone had a message for the geologist: “Don’t mistake me for granite!”

Short Jokes For Dad

If you wish to share a short text with your dad, share these fantastic short jokes that are quite humorous.

87. Sore throats are a big pain in the neck.

88. I never get a haircut. I got them all cut.

89. What do we call an unpredictable camera? A loose Canon.

90. Name the thing a house wears. Address.

91. How to steal a coat? You jacket.

92. What made the scarecrow win the award? It was out standing in the field.

93. Crabs are not into charity as they are shellfish.

94. Who lays deviled eggs? Evil chicken.

95. Why are cows seen wearing bells? Because the horns don’t work.

96. What is a fish with no eye called? A fsh.

97. I am all set to spread the rumor about butter.

98. A lazy kangaroo is called a pouch potato.

99. The right way to watch fly-fishing tournaments is a live stream.

100. What is a fibbing cat called? A lion.

101. Sushi is a little fishy.

102. I will call you later. No, call me dad.

103. Wonkey is a donkey with three legs.

104. I do not play soccer. I play it for kicks.

105. A sad cup of coffee is called depresso.

106. What will you call a guy with rubber toes? Roberto.

107. I dropped my pillow on the floor, and it seems to have a concushion.

108. Saturday and Sunday are the strongest days, as others are weekdays.

109. Math books are always so sad because they have many problems.

110. Trees look suspicious on sunny days as they seem shady.

111. I don’t appreciate morning funerals as I am not a mourning person.

112. I am collecting all the vintage albums by the Beatles. I need HELP.

113. When a hen counts her eggs, she is called a mathemachicken.

114. Impasta is a fake noodle.

115. The ATM got addicted to money, and it then suffered from withdrawals.

116. What rhyme with stinks and boos? You.

117. A hippie’s wife is called Mississippi.

118. While looking for a lighter on Amazon, I could find 401 matches.

119. Name the least spoken language in the world. It is sign language.

120. Why was Taylor Swift not attacked by the vampire? Because she had bad blood.

121. Why do bees have such sticky hair? They use honeycomb.

122. How to make holy water? Boil the hell out of it.

123. People say that they pick their noses. I am born with mine.

124. Diddly squats are the exercises for lazy people.

125. Why do some couples visit the gym? They want their relationship to work out.

Couple at the gym joke
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Image: IStock

126. Never trust stairs as they are always up to something.

127. I had to sell my vacuum cleaner as it was just busy gathering dust.

128. Terminator will be called Exterminator post-retirement.

129. What is the sound made by a witch’s car? It is broom-broom!

130. Nurses are fond of red crayons as they sometimes use them to draw blood.

131. I was supposed to get six Sprite cans, but I had picked 7 Up.

132. Which ocean is the most detailed-oriented? The Pacific Ocean.

133. How can you halt a bull’s charge? Simply cancel its credit card.

134. Ever wonder why fish seem so clever? Well, they swim in schools.

135. What was the reason the worker was let go from the keyboard factory? They weren’t clocking in enough shifts.

136. Have you heard the tale of the man who amputated his left leg? He’s perfectly right now.

137. Did you catch wind of the story about the astronaut who felt claustrophobic? He just needed some space.

138. What tunes should accompany your fishing adventure? Opt for something that really hooks you!

139. Wondering what you’d call a girl standing in the middle of a tennis court? Just Annette.

140. What’s the ocean’s dialogue with the beach? Nothing at all, it merely gave a friendly wave.

141. Have you ever overheard one wall chatting with another? They agreed to meet at the corner.

142. Why did the poodle invest in a clock? It aspired to be a vigilant watchdog.

143. Have you heard the tale of the walnut at the cashew gathering? It was nuts

144. Ever wondered about a skunk’s wealth? They only possess a single scent.

145. What was the reason behind the cookie’s visit to the doctor? It was having a crumby day.

146. Have you heard about the cold dinner? It was chili.

147. Why did the deer make an appointment with the dentist? It had quite the set of buck teeth.

148. Ever wondered why you shouldn’t confide in a balloon? They’re just full of hot air.

149. You might have noticed, but I’m quite fond of cheesy puns. That’s just how I roll my eyes.

150. Why did the banana seek medical advice? It wasn’t peeling too well.

151. Do you know where a sheep gets a stylish haircut? At the baa baa salon.

152. What comforting words did the mama cow offer the baby cow? “It’s pasture bedtime, my dear.”

153. Where did the cat wander off to after it misplaced its tail? The retail store became its destination.

154. Why don’t eggs share jokes with one another? They’d end up cracking themselves up.

155. What type of footwear do frogs prefer? They go for open-toad sandals.

156. What’s the term for a group of sheep tumbling down a hill? It’s a lambslide, without a doubt.

157. How do you go about arranging a space-themed gathering? You simply “planet.”

158. How many tickles does it require to bring a smile to an octopus? Ten tickles do the trick.

159. What’s the name of a potato sporting eyeglasses? Well, it’s a spec-tater, naturally.

160. What’s the title of an anonymous moose? Anonymoose, of course.

161. Why did the ram charge over the cliff? It was oblivious to the ewe’s sudden turn.

162. Why did the picture end up in jail? It got framed, quite unfairly.

163. What does a calendar like to snack on? Dates.

164. Why did the football stadium feel chilly? It had loads of fans.

165. Why do bananas put on sunscreen? Because they love to peel.

166. Why did the watch take a break? It needed some unwinding.

167. Why do melons celebrate weddings? Because they cantaloupe.

168. Why did the computer need glasses? To enhance its website.

169. What did the blanket tell the bed? I’ve got you all covered up.

170. What did the roof say to the shingle? The first one’s on the house.

One-Liner Dad Jokes

We bring to you the best one-liner punchlines that can be sent as silly prank messages to your dad and give him a surprise laugh.

171. Never iron the four-leaf clover as you cannot press your luck.

172. . I ordered an egg and chicken from Amazon. Just to check which one comes first.

173. When my wife called me immature, I asked her to leave my fort.

174. I have spent a lot of money and time childproofing my house, but they always get in.

175. Mount Rushmore is one rock group with four men who don’t sing.

176. The restaurant on the moon offers good food but without atmosphere.

177. Do you know what is there in a bathroom in France? Everything is European.

178. The difference between a well-dressed man on a bicycle and a poorly dressed man on a tricycle is ATTIRE.

179. A new dating service is going to start in Prague, and it’s called Czech-Mate.

180. An old man fell in the well as he could not see that well.

181. Last night a cheese factory in France exploded, and there is Da brie everywhere.

182. An invisible man turned down the job offer as he could not see himself doing it.

183. Wish to hear a joke on construction? Well, I am still working on it.

184. Mark stole my dictionary. I just told him in anger, ‘Mark, my words!’

185. Moses doesn’t make his coffee, Hebrews it.

186. How to tell if it is a dogwood tree? Just by the bark.

187. Name the state with maximum streets. Rhode Island.

188. Name the polite European water body. Merci.

189. What are 26 letters that have gone for a swim called? Alphawetical.

190. What’s the reason that green color is notoriously single? Because it is jaded.

191. The reason why celebrities are cool is that they have many fans.

192. I never liked facial hair, but it grew on me.

193. Sundays are kind of sad, but the day before is a much sadder day.

194. Dogs cannot operate the MRI machines but did you know catscan.

195. What were the utensils doing stuck together? Spooning.

196. When you are singing while bathing and soap gets into your mouth, it becomes soap opera.

197. How many apples grow on trees? All of them.

Apples on trees jokes
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198. The chiropractors like only one kind of music – hiphop.

199. The favorite hobby of a crafty dancer is cutting a rug.

200. Loafers are the shoes loved by lazy people.

201. The reason behind the insecurity of cold water is that it is never called hot.

202. I went to buy a pair of camouflage pants….but I couldn’t find any.

203. Have you caught wind of the shoe factory blaze? Sadly, it claimed countless soles.

204. Ever heard the one about the knife-wielding pig? They call it a pork chop.

205. What kind of fish knows how to do an appendectomy? A Sturgeon.

206. Curious about hiring a horse? Just set up a ladder.

207. Wonder why the pony craved water? Because it was a tiny horse, of course.

208. Rain pouring down like cats and dogs? Well, there’s something worse: hailing taxis!

209. When kids run out of activities, they turn to bored games.

210. The boy whispered to his fingers, “I’m counting on you.”

211. Elves have a unique taste in music; it’s all about that wrap music.

212. What common elements do cakes and baseball share? They both require a batter.

213. In what unusual circumstance does Friday precede Thursday? Only in the dictionary.

214. What did the tree express upon the arrival of spring? It exclaimed, “What a re-leaf!”

215. How can you determine if a pig is experiencing warmth? When it turns into bacon.

216. Have you heard about the man who feared hurdles? Remarkably, he managed to overcome his fear.

217. Why did the drum decide it was time for bed? Simply put, it was thoroughly beaten.

218. How would you describe an impolite cow? A cow with a beef jerky attitude.

219. Have you ever encountered a subpar sausage? It’s undoubtedly the wurst.

220. Were you informed about the individual who consumed invisible ink? Currently, he’s at the hospital, awaiting visibility.

221. Want to catch a squirrel’s attention? Just act a little nutty.

222. Did you hear about the cat that ate a lemon? Now it’s a sour puss.

223. What did one volcano say to the other? I lava you.

224. Why did the computer get a cold? Because it forgot to close a window.

225. How do rodents clean their teeth? They floss with string cheese.

226. How can you prepare an alligator for dinner? Cook it up in a croc-pot.

227. What did the earthquake say afterward? “Sorry, it was my fault!”

228. What’s the attire of choice for lawyers at work? Lawsuits, of course.

229. Why did the computer hit the bed? It needed to take a crash nap.

230. What’s the ideal gift for the Dentist of the Year? A little plaque, just for them.

231. What’s the secret to avoiding dry skin? Simply use a towel.

232. How can you tell when a comic passes gas? Something smells funny.

233. Can you name the insect that can tell time? It’s the clock-roach.

234. What’s the term for a can opener that’s lost its touch? It’s a can’t opener.

235. How do pigs tidy up? They go for a good scrub with some hogwash.

236. Do you know a pirate’s preferred letter? Surprisingly, it’s not “R” but the “C.”

237. Just like Humpty Dumpty’s great fall, summer had its moments too.

238. When is a door more than just a door? When it’s slightly ajar.

239. What exactly is a zebra? It’s a bit larger than an ‘A,’ to be precise.

Dad Jokes For Kids

With the right dad jokes for kids shared here, you don’t have to look anywhere else to find jokes that will take all the stress away.

240. What is the shoe made of banana called? A slipper.

241. Name the tallest building in the whole world. Library, as it has maximum stories.

242. Dogs float in water as they are good buoys.

243. What is a beehive without exit called? Unbelievable.

244. How does a penguin build the house? Igloos it together.

245. Why is it that skeletons never go treating or tricking? As they have nobody to go with.

246. Name a thing that is brown and sticky. It is a stick.

247. This graveyard is overcrowded. Looks like people are dying to get in there.

248. Can February march? No.

249. Name that thing that is orange but sounds like a parrot. Carrot.

250. Peter Pan is always flying because he Neverlands.

251. Why do vampires always look sick? They are coffins.

252. The favorite types of shoes of ninja are sneakers.

253. The coach was found shouting at the vending machine because he wanted his quarter back.

254. You need to have guts to donate organs.

255. Name the car sheep that likes driving. Lamborghini.

256. What did two bread slices say to each other on their wedding? Loaf at first sight!

257. I thought of telling a time-travel joke, but you people didn’t like it.

258. There is no point in looking for a perfect match, instead, use a lighter.

259. An accountant said that auditing the document is taxing.

260. Name the two twin daughters of a drummer. Anna One and Anna Two

261. Why is the roof of the mouth not called ceiling? Space bar

262. When I told my doctor, I could hear a buzzing sound. I was told that there was a bug moving around.

263. What is a toothless bear called? A gummy bear.

264. I lost my bank job on the first day. One person asked me to check his balance, and I pushed him.

265. What is common between the Eiffel Tower and a tick? They both are Paris sites.

266. Why did the astronaut bring two pairs of gloves? Just in case he needed a hand in space.

267. Have you heard of the bossy man at the pub? He was the one calling the shots.

268. Have you heard about the available broken guitar? It’s on sale with no strings attached.

269. I thought about taking a bath, but I decided to leave it as it was.

270. Once, I read a book on adhesive. I found it impossible to set aside.

271. There’s a horse that walks into a bar, and the bartender quips, “Why the long face?”

272. Wondering why the roofer visited the doctor? He had a case of shingles.

273. Did you catch wind of the lady who couldn’t quit her magazine collection? She had issues.

274. Ever wondered why the whale turned red? It spotted the ocean’s bottom.

275. When encountering a giant, what’s the best approach? Employ some big words.

276. What’s the term for a cow with only two legs? Call it “lean beef.”

277. What lies beneath the sea bottom and feels anxious? A nervous wreck.

278. How would you describe a guy with a rug atop his head? His name’s Matt.

279. What’s the best air to breathe if you want to be rich? Millionaire.

280. Why did the young girl toss a clock out the window? To watch time take flight.

281. Can you guess where armies find their place? Right in your sleeves.

282. One plate said to another, “I’m treating you to dinner tonight.”

283. Have you heard about the king’s trip to the dentist? He needed crowns.

284. When doctors get frustrated, what happens? They lose their patients.

285. What’s the invention that lets us peek through walls? It’s called windows.

286. Ever seen a rabbit’s jewelry? They wear 14 carrot gold.

287. Wonder why the sailor struggled with learning the alphabet? Well, he just couldn’t help but keep wandering off at ‘C.’

288. Ever wondered about cheese ownership? If it’s not yours, it’s simply nacho cheese!

289. Curious about the janitor’s reaction to jumping out of the closet? He exclaimed, “Supplies!”

290. Puzzled by the boy with a ladder on the bus? He was on a mission to reach high school!

291. Ever heard of a cowboy with a wiener dog? He was after a long little doggie.

292. Interested in how the barber won the race? He had a shortcut up his sleeve.

293. Searching for something even more incredible than a talking dog? Try a spelling bee.

294. Wondering what to call a legless cow? It’s plain and simple – ground beef.

295. What’s the key to a cheerful cowboy? The answer is a jolly rancher.

296. Need a fix for a broken tomato? Reach for some trusty tomato paste.

297. What kind of music scares balloons? Pop music.

298. Why did the orange halt its journey in the middle of the road? It had no more juice left to roll.

299. Why did Oreo pay a visit to the dentist? It needed a fix after losing its sweet filling.

300. How can you calm down an astronaut’s baby when it’s crying? Give it a rocket ride.

301. What’s the common link between dogs and phones? They both sport collar IDs.

302. Why is it not a good idea to play poker in the jungle? There are just too many cheetahs on the prowl.

303. What has a leathery texture and sounds like a sneeze? A shoe, of course.

Eiffel Tower and a tick joke
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Image: IStock

jokes about dads_illustration

Image: Stable Diffusion/MomJunction Design Team

Frequently Asked Questions

1. What’s the difference between a dad joke and a regular joke?

There is no major difference. However, dad jokes mostly involve a play on words or puns. These jokes also involve animals and the regular things that we see around us.

2. Why are dad jokes so popular?

Dad jokes may seem silly, but the silliness makes them so appealing. It may not tickle your brain, but it will surely brighten your day. These qualities make these jokes quite popular.

3. Why do dads love to tease their children with jokes?

Dad jokes mostly involve wordplay, and these jokes are easy to grab a child’s attention. They not only make a child laugh but also make it great for family bonding, letting the entire family have a hearty laugh together.

Jokes about dads need not make sense or have logic to support them. They are meant to make your father laugh while letting you share a good time. Our collection of goofy dad jokes includes corny, one-liners, funny, dad jokes for kids, and short dad jokes to suit your requirement and mood for comedy. These quips will not hurt your dad’s feelings but give them a hearty laugh. So share these jokes and have a spirited discussion about them. It will also help strengthen your bond.

Infographic: Dad Jokes To Make The Whole Family Laugh

Laughter can bring the whole family together. Dad jokes have always been a favorite genre among fathers and uncles of the house to share humor. The infographic below presents some comical and hilarious Dad jokes to share with the family for a good laugh.

hilarious dad jokes for a good laugh (infographic)

Illustration: Momjunction Design Team

Get the high-quality PDF version of this infographic.

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