400+ Funny Love Quotes For Her And Him

Giggles and laughter are essential to keep a relationship lively. A great sense of humor between partners kicks away monotony and boredom and brings them closer. So, if you want a fun way to spend some quality time with your partner while laughing your hearts out, read some funny love quotes together. Our collection of sweet yet jocular love quotes will bring smiles and cheer for a fun and loving time together.

These affectionate quotes will surely begin tickling your funny bone and help relive moments of love and happiness that were the foundations of your union. Happy reading!

Funny Quotes For Him

Humor and laughter can make people forge a better connection with each other. Sunvi Aggarwal, a blogger, says, ”When someone makes me laugh (the hearty one), I think about them and what they said very fondly. They’ve been good for my soul and deserve my mindshare. I look forward to meeting them again and getting the whole stream of joy flowing again (i).”

So, if have many things to tell him but are unable to find amusing and endearing ways to convey your thoughts, here are a few tender and funny quotes for him.

1. “Every day, I find myself falling in love with you a little bit more, but damn, you were annoying for sure the other day.“
2. “A man in love is not complete until he is married. Then he is finished.” —Zsa Zsa Gabor
3. “I would love you, no matter what. Even if you were to fart in your sleep.”
4. “Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.” —Jackie Mason
5. “Besides my cup of coffee, you’re my favorite.”
6. “The way you look at me is similar to the way I look at a chocolate cake. I love it!”
7. “He’s like a brilliant, sexy little hummingbird.” —Leslie Knope (about Ben), Parks and Recreation
8. “An archeologist is the best husband any woman can have; the older she gets, the more interested he is in her.” —Agatha Christie
9. “If you text “I love you” and the person writes back an emoji – no matter what that emoji is they don’t love you back” —Chelsea Peretti
10. “True love is singing karaoke ‘Under Pressure’ and letting the other person sing the Freddie Mercury part.” —Mindy Kaling

11. “Love is like a fart, if you force it it’s probably crap.” ―Joe Wiley
12. “Oh, no! I like you more than I planned to.”

Image: IStock

13. “A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days.” ―Tim Allen
14. “My dopamine levels go crazy when I’m with you.”
15. “There’s nothing wrong in admitting that I make your life so much better.”
16. “I know why you’re so tired. You have vitamin ‘Me’ deficiency.”
17. “The reason why you’re so adorable is ’coz I constantly adore you.”
18. “I love being married. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” ―Rita Rudner
19. “What’s the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? About 30 pounds.” ―Cindy Garner
20. “The tingly feeling you get when you meet someone is common sense leaving your body.”
21. “I hate you for stealing my heart, so I plan to steal your last name.”
22. “It’s the 21st century. I don’t need an alpha male to protect me. I don’t need a big, strong man to fight off a tiger. I need a geek who can get my naked photos off the cloud.” —Whitney Cummings
23. “I would love you forever. But alas! A human’s life is not that long.”
24. “Love is sharing your popcorn.” ―Charles M. Schultz
25. “I can’t eat in the morning cause I think of you. I can’t eat in the afternoon cause I think of you. I can’t sleep at night cause I’m hungry.”
26. “No, I don’t get butterflies in my stomach when I’m with you; I get the entire zoo!“
27. “I love you as much as I’m annoyed by you, which is quite a lot.”
28. “I miss crawling into a man’s arm, kissing his neck, saying those three little words into his ear, ‘And another thing…” ―Felicia Michaels
29. “I think I lack vitamin U in my life.”
30. “I don’t love you with my heart; I love you with my belly cause it’s bigger.”
31. “Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.” ―Ambrose Bierce
32. “The day I preferred you over a burger, I knew it was true love.”
33. “Every day I look at you, I can’t help but wonder what made you a lucky man. Then I remember it was me.”
34. “While I may be left-handed, I’ve yet to figure out that my spouse is always right!” ―Matthew Alan House
35. “You must be made of Iodine, Livermorium, and Uranium because I Lv U!”
36. “People do stupid things when in love ― like me sending you this text saying I miss you.”
37. “I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.” ―Rita Rudner
38. “By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.” ―Socrates
39. “I still remember the day you whispered those four words to me ― I’ll do the dishes.”
40. “Marrying a man is like buying something you’ve been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn’t always go with everything else.” ―Jean Kerr
41. “Obviously, if I was serious about having a relationship with someone long-term, the last people I would introduce him to would be my family.” ―Chelsea Handler

42. “Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.” ―Erma Bombeck

Image: IStock

43. “A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.” ―Mignon McLaughlin
44. “Love is the same as like except you feel sexier.” ―Judith Viorst
45. “I want to be the reason why you look down at your phone and smile. I want to be the reason why you smile while you dream. I want to be the reason why you smile at nothing.”
46. “Even in a world full of art, it is you who would mesmerize me.”
47. “As a man in a relationship, you have a choice: You can be right or you can be happy.” ―Ralphie May
48. “The way you make me laugh and feel safe is the reason why I love you. All I’m saying is I’ve been waiting to fall in love with a clown ninja.”
49. “I let you go, and you came back with some coffee. That was when I knew we were meant to be together.”
50. “Every time we argue, one of us is right. The other one is you.”
51. “Hey! Do you believe in love at first sight? I could always walk into you until you do.”
52. “Love is being stupid together.” ―Paul Valery
53. “Love is a lot like a backache: it doesn’t show up on X-rays, but you know it’s there.” ―George Burns
54. “It is funny how the human mind works. Mine worked quite well until the moment I met you.“
55. “Marriage is like vitamins: we supplement each other’s minimum daily requirements.” ―Kathy Mohnke
56. “What’s the best way to have your husband remember your anniversary? Get married on his birthday.” ―Cindy Garner
57. “Women hope men will change after marriage, but they don’t; men hope women won’t change, but they do.” ―Bettina Arndt
58. “It was love at first sight for me with you. But I had to take another look to be sure.”
59. “If you’re looking for a way to prove your love to me, just pause your game.”
60. “Romantic love is mental illness. But it’s a pleasurable one. It’s a drug. It distorts reality, and that’s the point of it. It would be impossible to fall in love with someone that you really saw.” ―Fran Lebowitz
61. “Can I borrow a kiss? I promise I’ll give it back.”
62. “If you can stay in love for more than two years, you’re on something.” ―Fran Lebowitz
63. “Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet service to see who they really are.” ―Will Ferrell
64. “You may add meaning to my life, but you do subtract a lot of my food.”
65. “My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on.” ―Joan Rivers
66. “Hi! may I please borrow a band-aid? I just hit my head falling for you.”
67. “I love you from my head tomatoes.”
68. “My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don’t really know me.” ―Garry Shandling

69. “I would fight the world for you. Well, maybe not the world, at least the country. No, let’s bring it down to the street. How about this? I will fight you for you.”
70. “Being a good husband is like being a stand-up comic. You need 10 years before you can call yourself a beginner.” ―Jerry Seinfeld
71. “Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings… and lawyers.” ―Richard Pryor
72. “My wife gets all the money I make. I just get an apple and clean clothes every morning.” ―Ray Romano
73. “A kiss may not be the truth but it is what we wish were true.” ―Steve Martin as Harris Telemacher in L.A. Story
74. “I don’t know how you put up with me. Oh, wait! Just the way I put up with you. That makes us even.”
75. “A man falls in love through his eyes, a woman through her ears.” ―Woodrow Wyatt
76. “I always thought you would be my prince on a white horse. Little did I know, I was supposed to come and pick you up.”
77. “Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.” ―Albert Einstein

Image: IStock

78. “I would jump into a volcano for you. Just kidding, it’s too hot in there.”
79. “Things I love the most in this world: chocolate, dogs, cats, and you.”
80. “If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?” ―Lily Tomlin
81. “The only kind of fire not covered by insurance is my fire for you.”
82. “I know I am a handful, but that’s why you have two hands“
83. “Women love a self-confident bald man.” ―Larry Bald
84. “Where love is the case, the doctor is an ass.” ―English Proverb
85. “When you’re with me, follow your heart. But do bring your brain along too.”
86. “Love isn’t complicated; it is the people in it.”
87. “I swear to stop wearing a baggy nightgown, the day you swear to stop brushing over me.”
88. “I am yours, and you are mine. There are no refunds.”
89. ”It is hard to find dedicated, cute, caring, and sexy people these days. Take my advice for it; don’t lose me.”
90. “It’s fun to complain with someone. Nothing brings us together more than complaining about other people. That might be the thing that holds us together more than anything.” ―Lew Schneider
91. “I promise to annoy you every single day for the rest of our lives.”
92. “I had a dream that I still loved you…I think I woke up screaming.” ―Christine
93. “Do you wanna commit a crime? You steal my heart, and I’ll steal yours.”
94. “Love is blind but marriage is a real eye-opener.” ―Pauline Thomason
95. “A kiss without a mustache is like an egg without salt.” ―Rose Wilder Lane
96. “I would like to lodge a complaint against you for being too adorable.”
97. “In case you haven’t noticed, I’m wearing the smile you brought into my life.”
98. “I love you no matter what you do, but do you have to do so much of it?” ―Jean Illsley Clarke
99. “Love is an electric blanket with somebody else in control of the switch.” ―Cathy Carlyle
100. “People should fall in love with their eyes closed.” ―Andy Warhol
101. “I love you even when I’m hungry.”
102. “You’re the reason I wake up with bed hair.”
103. “Marriage can sometimes feel like a workshop where the husband works and the wife shops.”
104. “You’re more than just my boyfriend; you’re my go-to emergency contact.”
105. “My affection for you surpasses even my love for coffee, but let’s not have a contest about it.”
106. “My love for you is akin to the mathematical constant pi; it’s boundless and never-ending.”
107. “If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber!”
108. “You’re the peanut butter to my jelly.”
109. “You’re my favorite notification.”
110. “I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.”
111. “My love for you is like a candle. So, forget me at your own risk.”
112. You’re not just my love; you’re my weirdo.”
113. “I love you more than Wi-Fi. And that’s saying something.”
114. “I love you to the fridge and back.”
115. “I’m yours, no refunds.”
116. “You’re my favorite reason to lose sleep.”
117. “You’re my partner in crime, and I couldn’t do it without you.”
118. “I love you more than a kid loves candy.”
119. “Falling in love with you was the second-best decision I ever made. The first was ordering pizza.”
120. “Our love story is like a romantic comedy, but with more snacks.”
121. “If we were on a deserted island, I’d want Wi-Fi and you. In that order.”
122. “You’re my favorite notification, even when you send me annoying game requests.”
123. “Our love is like fine wine. It improves over time, although occasionally it results in a headache.”
124. “People say love is blind, but I’m fairly certain you’re the culprit who swiped my glasses.”
125. “You’re the reason I eagerly anticipate each morning. Well, that and my morning coffee.”
126. “They say love is blind, but I’m pretty convinced you’re the one who made off with my eyeglasses.”
127. “You’re the reason I eagerly await each morning. Well, that and a cup of coffee.”
128. “I adore you more than I adore sleep, and I just love sleep.”
129. “You’re the cause of my frequent tardiness. I can’t help it; I become entranced in your gaze.”
130. “I’d exchange all my emojis for just one of your smiles.”
131. “You’re not just my better half; you complete me entirely.”
132. “You bring so much joy into my life that my face hurts from smiling. Thanks for the facial workout!”
133. “You’re the only fish in the sea for me, and trust me; I’ve seen a lot of fish.”
134. “You’re like vintage cheese – you get tastier with age.”
135. “Love is spending the entire weekend in your PJs and still calling it a romantic getaway.”
136. “You’re my lobster, and not just because lobsters mate for life, but because you’re a little bit shellfish, too.”
137. “If love is blind, then marriage is like a real-life game of ‘Guess Who?'”
138. “You’re the reason I wake up with a smile and also the reason I can’t find my socks.”
139. “Our love is so real that I almost forgot about Netflix.”
140. “You complete me, like how fries complete a burger.”
141. “Life with you is like a never-ending comedy show – except I never get tired of the jokes.”
142. “They say love is blind, but I still noticed you’re wearing mismatched socks.”
143. “Love is sharing your chocolate. Love is also pretending not to notice when I eat your chocolate.”
144. “You’re the missing piece to my puzzle, and I promise not to lose you under the couch.”
145. “You’re the warmest hello and the hardest goodbye – especially when you take the TV remote with you.”
146. “I love you even when you snore, hog the blankets, and steal the entire bed. You’re lucky you’re cute!”
147. You’re my favorite distraction from doing productive things.”
148. “Love is sharing your popcorn and also your Netflix password.”
149. “Love is letting you have the last piece of pizza, even if it means I only get one slice.”
150. “You’re my partner in crime, my partner in Netflix, and my partner in eating all the snacks.”
151. “They say love is blind, but in our case, it might need glasses.”
152. “You’re not just my better half; you’re my better two-thirds, especially when it comes to decision-making.”
153. “Marriage can be compared to a deck of cards; initially, it only requires two hearts and a diamond to begin. By the end, you’re looking for a club and a spade!”
154. “You’re like my favorite dessert – sweet, irresistible, and always worth the extra calories.”
155. “They say love is patient, but if you take too long to decide what to eat, I might lose my patience!”
156. “Even if it’s considered wrong to love you, I don’t want to be right, even though you always put the toilet paper roll the wrong way!”
157. “They say opposites attract, but I’m still waiting for you to become a morning person.”
158. “Our love is like a romantic comedy – full of laughter, a few tears, and plenty of popcorn.”
159. Marriage is a fancy word for adopting an adult who can’t do laundry correctly.”
160. “You’re the reason I’ve upgraded to the family-sized bag of chips – because sharing a small one is just too ambitious.”
161. “Our love is like a TV remote – I can’t find it when it’s lost, but it’s always right where you left it!”
162. “They say love is in the air, but sometimes, it smells more like last night’s leftovers.”
163. “You’re my favorite notification, right after ‘Low Battery’ – because you both need constant attention!”
164. “Our love is like a Rubik’s Cube – it’s challenging, but I’m determined to figure it out.”
165. “You’re the one I want to grow old and weird with – especially the weird part.”
166. “I must be a snowflake because I’ve fallen for you, and I’m also really unique.”
167. “You’re the reason I have laugh lines and a few gray hairs, but I wouldn’t change a thing.”
168. “Love is blind, but marriage is like an eye exam – it tests your vision constantly.”
169. You’re the reason our Netflix ‘Watch History’ looks like a crime scene.”
170. “I wouldn’t trade you for all the chocolate in the world… well, maybe for a day or two.”
171. “They say love is a battlefield, but I think we’re both just casualties in the war of who gets the remote control.”
172. “Marriage is finding someone to share your fries with, even when you said you didn’t want any.”
173. “If love is a game, I promise to be on your team, even when you’re winning.”
174. “Marriage is just a fancy word for putting up with your weird habits.”
175. “They say love is blind, but I’ve seen your dance moves.”
176. They say love is patient, but they never had to wait for you to get ready.”
177. “I didn’t choose the married life; the married life chose me, and it’s surprisingly great.”
178. “Marriage is when a man and woman become one. The real trouble starts when they try to decide which one.”
179. “My boyfriend and I are a team. He cooks, and I eat. It works.”
180. “My boyfriend’s idea of a perfect evening is a movie, popcorn, and no talking.”
181. “My husband says I’m overdramatic. That’s when I fainted.”
182. “I asked my husband if he ever fantasized about me. He said, ‘Yes, sometimes I dream that you leave me alone.'”
183. “Behind every great man, there is a woman rolling her eyes.”
184. “My man thinks I’m crazy. I say, ‘It takes one to know one.'”
185. My boyfriend and I were happy for 23 years. Then, we met.”
186. “Marriage is about knowing which hand towels you can use and which ones are for guests.”
187. “My husband and I have an amazing relationship. He doesn’t mind that I’m not in it.”
188. My boyfriend is the most handsome, understanding, and kind man in the world. And I’m not just saying that because he’s reading this.”
189. “I asked my husband if he wanted dinner. He said, ‘Sure, what are my choices?’ I said, ‘Yes or No.'”
190. “Husband: Honey, am I the only man you’ve ever loved? Wife: Of course you are. Why would I make the same mistake twice?”
191. “I told my husband I needed more space. So, he locked me outside.”
192. “You’re the reason I’m not allowed to shop online after 10 PM.”
193. “You’re the only person I’d trust to hold my phone – because I’ve anyhow locked my messages.”
194. “If love is a game, you’re my cheat code.”
195. “Love is in the air, but so is the smell of your gym socks.”
196. “You’re the ‘cherry on top’ of my life’s sundae, even though you forget to put the lid on the toothpaste.”
197. “Love is letting you have the TV remote, even though I secretly control Netflix.”
198. “You’re like a dictionary – you add meaning to my life, and sometimes, you’re hard to understand.”
199. “My husband’s idea of helping with housework is turning the vacuum cleaner on, so I can hear it from the other room.”
200. “I love my husband, but he spends more time picking a Netflix show than he did picking an engagement ring.”

Funny Quotes For Her

Love can be difficult to express.  How about using these funny and comical quotes to express your feelings to your doting girlfriend?

201. “My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met.” ―Rodney Dangerfield
202. “I can’t make you love me, but I can fill my pantry with your favorite snacks and offer you a weekly stipend of $75.” ―Rob Delaney
203. “You must be a camera cause you always make me smile.“
204. “You must be a magician! Everything around me disappears when I see your goofy smile.”
205. “Stick with me because I’ll ruin your lipstick, not your mascara.”
206. “Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you’re in.” ―Richard Jeni
207. “You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.” ―Dr. Seuss
208. “If she happens to fall, I’ll be there to laugh at first and then help her up afterwards.” ―J.A. Redmerski
209. “It wasn’t my intention to fall in love with you, but then you smiled.”
210. “Can you please look at me that way you look at food?”
211. “I love you as much as I love my favorite team.”

212. “I love the adorable things you do when you’re angry ― like not texting me back.”
213. “If love is a sweet dream, then marriage is an alarm clock.”
214. “My wife was afraid of the dark… then she saw me naked and now she’s afraid of the light.” ―Rodney Dangerfield
215. “Dear, when I say I would fix something, I do it. Please stop reminding me every six months.”
216. “In any perfect relationship men should remember it’s a matter of direction; she takes what’s right and you take what’s left.” ―Solitaire Parke
217. “I promise to love you even during the playoffs.”

Image: IStock

218. “It would be a privilege to have my heart broken by you.” ―John Green, The Fault In Our Stars
219. “Love is telling someone their hair extensions are showing.” ―Natasha Leggero
220. “The great question which I have not been able to answer is, ‘What does a woman want?” ―Freud
221. “My wife is really sentimental. One Valentine’s Day I gave her a ring and to this day she has never forgotten those three little words that were engraved inside Made in Taiwan!” ―Leopold Fechtner
222. “We pair as great as mac ‘N’ cheese.”
223. “He gave her a look that you could have poured on a waffle.” ―Ring Lardner
224. “I don’t need to know about the solar system cause my whole world revolves around you.”
225. “Finding you was as hard as finding a needle in a haystack.”
226. “Yes, to the untrained eye, I’m eating an orange. But to the eye that has brains, I’m making a point about marriage. For you see, marriage is a lot like an orange. First, you have the skin. Then the sweet, sweet innards.” ―Homer, The Simpsons
227. “Are you made of Copper and Tellurium? Cause you’re CuTe”
228. “Me falling in love with you more as each day passes must be the greatest miracle of all. I wish there were a traffic light to let me know when to stop.”
229. “You make my eyeglasses fog up.”
230. “Love doesn’t drop on you unexpectedly; you have to give off signals, sort of like an amateur radio operator.” ―Helen Gurley Brown
231. “My biggest achievements in life: sanity and you.”
232. “I love you so much that I’d jump off a cliff for you. Well, as long as they’re not too high, I’m acrophobic. Alright, maybe just a few stairs.”
233. “Your license must be suspended for driving me crazy.”
234. “You should be kissed and often, and by someone who knows how.” ―Rhett Butler, Gone With The Wind
235. “I would fall for you even in zero gravity.”
236. “In love, somehow, a man’s heart is always either exceeding the speed limit or getting parked in the wrong place.” ―Helen Rowland
237. “You are my Wi-Fi for sure. Cause I feel a connection.”
238. “Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your heart or burn down your house, you can never tell.” ―Joan Crawford
239. “Marriage is a great institution for those who like institutions.” ―Tommy Dewar
240. “You say you love chocolate cakes, but you cut them. You say you love chocolates, but then you melt them. You say you love me, and now I’m scared.”
241. “Men are from Earth. Women are from Earth. Deal with it.” ―George Carlin
242. “I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.” ―David Bissonette
243. “Besides my PlayStation, you are my favorite.”
244. “My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe.” ―Jimmy Durante
245. “You are as important as oxygen to me.”
246. “We’re like Romeo & Juliet. Except for the dying part of course.”―Justina
247. “Love is not having to hold in your farts anymore.” ―Bree Luckey
248. “The more she turned right the more I turned wrong.” ―Mark W. Boyer
249. “In my house, I’m the boss, my wife is just the decision-maker.” ―Woody Allen
250. “Are you my map? Cause I get lost without you.”
251. “Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood.” ―Oscar Wilde
252. “Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties.” ―Jules Renard
253. “The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.” ―Henry Youngman
254. “Your absence is like an empty fridge.”
255. “Marriage is not just spiritual communion and passionate embraces; marriage is also three-meals-a-day and remembering to carry out the trash.” ―Joyce Brothers
256. “Our relationship is like a walk in the park. Jurassic Park.”
257. “I think you owe me a drink cause the first time I met you, I dropped mine.”
258. “If you’re a bird, I’m a bird.” ―Nicholas Park, The Notebook
259. “The next time you’re mad, I’d put a cape around you and say, ‘Now you’re super mad.’”
260. “Your ability to turn a statement into a six-hour argument is what I love the most.”
261. “I love you enough to make our iOS and Android relationship work.”
262. “Spend a few minutes a day really listening to your spouse. No matter how stupid his problems sound to you.” —Megan Mullally
263. “She makes the bass drop in my heart.” —The Good Place

Image: IStock

264. “Your love made me a cook, poet, composer, artist, painter, mechanic, and whatnot!”
265. “I think you have good taste. You fell in love with me.”
266. “A smile is an inexpensive way to change your looks.” —Charles Gordy
267. “When I look at you, I forget how to flirt.”
268. “I love you as much as I love my bed. Neither of you needs much commitment.”
269. “I promise to love you forever. Even when the game is on.”
270. “There must be millions of people all over the world who never get any love letters. I could be their leader.”- Charles M. Schulz
271. “Sometimes. Life gives you great things. So here I am.”
272. “I solemnly swear to love you, even when I’m hungry.”
273. “It’s like at that moment the whole universe existed just to bring us together.” —Serendipity
274. “I almost had a psychic girlfriend, but she left me before we met.” —Steven Wright
275. “You can’t put a price tag on love. But if you could, I’d wait for it to go on sale.” —Hussein Nishah
276. “Love is much nicer to be in than an automobile accident, a tight girdle, a higher tax bracket or a holding pattern over Philadelphia.” —Judith Viorst
277. “I’m on my way to a hospital cause you just stole my heart.”
278. “I may not be a photographer, but I know we would make a great picture together.”
279. “You belong in a museum cause you’re a work of art.”
280. “Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So, each is inevitably disappointed.” —Albert Einstein
281. “Love can change a person the way a parent can change a baby- awkwardly, and often with a great deal of mess.” —Lemony Snicket
282. “Our love might have been blind, but our marriage was an eye-opener. You love baby rhymes?”
283. “I love you so much that I’d always order some extra fries during our dates.”
284. “If love is blind, then how come I can see how pretty you look?”
285. “I’d love you even if you love pineapples on pizza.”
286. “Met a genie the other day. Said you had three wishes. Well, I’m here now; what were the other two?”
287. “Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age; as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.” ―Phyllis Diller
288. “If only one could tell true love from false love as one can tell mushrooms from toadstools.” —Katherine Mansfield
289. “God called. He’s missing an angel.”
290. “My love life is like a piece of Swiss cheese; most of it’s missing, and what’s there stinks.” —Joan Rivers

291. “The day you said you loved Star Wars, I knew Yoda one for me.”
292. “Give me golf clubs, fresh air, and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air.” —Jack Benny
293. “If anyone says Disneyland is the happiest place in the world, they never met you.”
294. “I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.” —Groucho Marx
295. “Nothing lasts forever. I’d like to be your nothing.”
296. “Everytime you sneeze, I want to say ‘God bless you.’ But then I look at myself and realize that he already has.”
297. “There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.” —Chris Rock
298. “The happiest marriage I can picture would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman.” —Coleridge
299. “Not even Snape could Severus apart.”
300. “If you love ’em in the morning with their eyes full of crust; if you love ’em at night with their hair full of rollers, chances are, you’re in love.” —Miles Davis
301. “Please let me walk you home. I have a passion for following my dreams.”
302. “Relationships often resemble algebra. Have you ever gazed at your X and wondered Y?”
303. “They say love is blind, but with you, it’s more like love is a delightful and entertaining circus. I wouldn’t want it any other way!”
304. “You’re so sweet that even sugar gets jealous of your sweetness. I hope you don’t give diabetes to our love!”
305. “They say behind every great man is a great woman. Well, behind this goofy man is an even goofier woman, and I wouldn’t have it any other way!”
306. “You make my heart skip a beat, and my keys skip a pocket. Seriously, where are my keys again?”
307. “If I had a dollar for every time you made me smile, I’d be in a higher tax bracket!”
308. “You and I go together like coffee and donuts—perfectly sweet and addictively delightful!”
309. They say love is blind, but with you, it’s like having a GPS that leads me straight into walls and lampposts.”
310. “You’re the reason I can’t stop smiling and also the reason my phone’s facial recognition never works.”
311. “If love is a battlefield, then our relationship is a Nerf gun fight—lots of fun with no casualties.”
312. “You’re the reason my phone’s battery is always low. All those late-night text marathons!”
313. “You’re so amazing; you should come with a warning label: ‘May cause uncontrollable laughter and love.'”
314. “Our love is like a fine-tuned joke—sometimes it’s cheesy, but it always leaves us laughing.”
315. “Life with you is like a never-ending comedy show, and I’m the lucky audience of one!”
316. “You’re so amazing that I’d even share my dessert with you. Okay, maybe just a bite.”
317. “If laughter is the best medicine, then our relationship is the best pharmacy in town.”
318. “They say love makes the world go round, but with you, it’s more like a delightful spin on a rollercoaster.”
319. “You’re my favorite distraction from life’s seriousness. Let’s be silly together forever.”
320. “Our relationship is like a pizza—cheesy, sometimes messy, but always delicious.”
321. “They say love is like a rose, but our love is more like a cactus—prickly on the outside but full of juicy moments.”
322. “I love you more than a kid loves recess, and that’s saying something!”
323. “I promise to always be your sidekick, even if that means just handing you the remote control.”
324. “Our love is like a game of hide and seek. You always find a way to hide my socks!”
325. “You’re the most delightful plot twist in the story of my life.”
326. “They say laughter is the best medicine, and you, my dear, are my daily prescription.”
327. “You’re my favorite person to text, even though half the time, I’m just in the next room.”
328. “If love were a math problem, you’d be the solution to all my equations.”
329. “Our love is like a campfire—it’s warm, inviting, and sometimes, it makes marshmallows explode.”
330. “You’re the reason I can’t keep a straight face in serious situations.”
331. “They say you complete me, but honestly, you just make me more of a happy mess.”
332. “If our love were a song, it would be a catchy tune with a chorus of laughter.”
333. “I love you more than our dog loves chasing its own tail, and that’s saying something!”
334. “You’re the reason I believe in happily ever after, even if it involves a lot of laughter.”
335. “Our love is like a well-written comedy script—full of unexpected twists and hilarious punchlines.”
336. “You’re my favorite comedian, and your love is the best punchline of all.”
337. “I promise to always be your partner in crime, even if our ‘crimes’ are just cheesy movie marathons.”
338. “You’re the sunshine on my rainy days and the rainbow after my storms of silliness.”
339. “You’re the reason I believe in love songs, even though I can’t carry a tune.”
340. “I’m not a poet, but with you, I’m definitely a comedian.”
341. “You’re so sweet that even a candy gets a toothache when it’s near you.”
342. “Our love is like a recipe for laughter, and you’re the secret ingredient.”
343. “You’re the reason my hair’s turning gray, but don’t worry, it’s a stylish silver now.”
344. “Even on gloomy days, you brighten my world, although you can be a storm when your phone goes missing.”
345. “I fell for you when you stumbled over nothing, showing me your clumsiness, just like mine.”
346. “You and I are the perfect match. I’m hot, and you’re… lucky.”
347. “Our love story should be turned into a comedy movie. We’d win all the Oscars for ‘Best Goofy Duo.”
348. “You light up my life, and sometimes, you also light up the kitchen when you forget to turn off the oven.”
349. “If you were a novel, you’d top the charts with your mix of unexpected twists and humor.”
350. “You’re the person I love to playfully tease the most, and I’m convinced you secretly relish it as well.”
351. “If our love were a film, it’d be a romantic comedy filled with numerous bloopers and behind-the-scenes moments.”
352. “You’re the reason I wake up with a smile, even on Mondays when the world seems a bit too serious.”
353. “They say love is all you need. Clearly, they never ran out of coffee or Wi-Fi.”
354. “You make my heart go boom, but my laundry goes beep, beep, beep.”
355. “If we were on a deserted island, I’d still find a way to annoy you, but at least we’d be stuck together.”
356. You’re like a diamond – rare, precious, and sometimes a little bit of a pain to deal with.”
357. “They say the best things in life are free. So, can I get a refund for all the dinners I’ve bought you?”
358. “They say love is like a plant; it takes time to grow. Well, our love is more like a weed – it just won’t stop thriving!”
359. “They say love is a journey, and I’m glad to be stuck in this traffic jam of love with you.”
360. “You’re the one who turns my ordinary days into extraordinary ones, or at least, you make my microwave dinners seem gourmet.”
361. “You’re not just my girlfriend; you’re my partner in crime, my partner in takeout, and my partner in arguing about which show to watch next.”
362. “You make my heart skip a beat, but it’s probably just a caffeine overdose from all the coffee you’ve convinced me to drink.”
363. “You’re my favorite decision, and I’ve made some questionable ones in the past.”
364. “You’re the reason my parents think I’m always texting, even when I’m just laughing at your hilarious messages.”
365. “You’re my emergency contact not because you’re responsible but because I need you to bail me out of my own crazy adventures.”
366. “You’re my favorite part of every day, even when you steal the covers at night.”
367. “You make my heart sing, and by ‘sing,’ I mean beat irregularly and skip a few notes.”
368. “I love my wife, but she might be a serial cereal killer. All my cereal boxes are empty!”
369. “I’m not saying my girlfriend is a bad cook, but we pray after we eat.”
370. “My wife is so organized; I swear she has a spreadsheet for our arguments.”
371. “My wife says I never listen to her. At least, that’s what I think she said.”
372. “I gifted my girlfriend a fridge for her birthday. You should have seen her face light up when she opened it.”
373. “My wife is the most understanding person I know. She understands why I can’t understand her.”
374. If my girlfriend were a superhero, her superpower would be finding things I’ve lost.”
375. “Marriage is a workshop where the tools are never in the same place you left them.”
376. “My wife and I have an amazing relationship. We’re both committed to making it work, and by ‘it,’ I mean the Wi-Fi.”
377. “My girlfriend and I are like two peas in a pod. We irritate each other, but we’re stuck together.”
378. “My wife’s shopping habits are the secret to our successful marriage. They keep me too busy to argue.”
379. “My girlfriend is the reason I know all the lyrics to cheesy love songs. She sings them in the shower every morning.”
380. “Marriage is a partnership where one person is always cold, and the other one is the wife.”
381. “My wife is a fantastic archaeologist. She can find things I’ve lost years ago.”
382. “I asked my girlfriend what she wanted for her birthday. She said, ‘Just a little bit of your time.’ So, I got her a clock.”
383. “Love is letting your partner have the last piece of pizza – unless it’s your favorite topping.”
384. “My wife said she’d leave me if I didn’t stop acting like a flamingo. So, I had no choice but to put my foot down.”
385. “My girlfriend is the only person who can put a smile on my face while also making me question everything.”
386. “My wife is the queen of multitasking. She can annoy me and make me laugh at the same time.”
387. “Love is when you’re both too lazy to get up from the couch, but you manage to get snacks somehow.”
388. “My girlfriend is like a dictionary. She has all the words, but I still can’t find the right ones.”
389. “My wife’s idea of a balanced diet is a chocolate bar in each hand.”
390. “Marriage is all about compromise. Like when my wife says, ‘Do what you want,’ and then I do exactly what she wants.”
391. “My wife and I have an amazing relationship. She makes the decisions, and I pretend to agree.”
392. “I told my wife she’s in charge of the calendar. She marked my birthday as a national holiday.”
393. “My girlfriend and I have an agreement: I pretend to listen, and she pretends I’m not pretending.”
394. “My girlfriend can finish a book in a day. It takes me a month to finish the milk.”
395. “My girlfriend is the only person I know who can turn a shopping trip into a treasure hunt.”
396. “My girlfriend and I are a perfect match. I’m the match, and she’s the fire.”
397. “The secret of our successful relationship is she talks and I……don’t listen.”
398. “I asked my girlfriend what’s for dinner, and she said, ‘Reservations.’
399. “My girlfriend is the boss of the relationship. She even picked out this quote for me to say.”
400. “My girlfriend is like a GPS. She tells me where to go, and I still get lost.”
401. “Marriage is just two people asking each other if they’re ready to order yet.”

Image: Stable Diffusion/MomJunction Design Team

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Infographic: Funny Quotes About Love To Send To Your Partner

Fun is as crucial to a relationship as romance. You can’t always be serious or romantic, just like you can’t always be funny. Therefore, when away from the love of your life, try sending them some humorous quotes to bring back all the wonderful memories. Here is an infographic with some funny quotes to send your mate.

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Illustration: Momjunction Design Team

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In the mood for some fun and romance? Then be ready to laugh out loud with these funny quotes about love! Enjoy these short, hilarious love quotes that will make you smile.

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Shivank JoshiBA (Mass Communication)

Shivank is an experienced professional with a passion for writing, editing, and research. With a bachelor’s degree in Mass Communication from IEL, Dehradun, he previously worked as a production editor. Shivank transitioned into a writer/editor, contributing to various publications as a freelancer. He writes literature, including quotes, poems and wishes, for MomJunction. He has a special interest in music and...more

Akshay NairMA

Akshay is an associate editor and former journalist with more than four years of experience. A post graduate in Mass Communication and Journalism, he has strong professional and academic background in the field of content writing and editing. He is also a Certified Relationship Workshop Facilitator for Life Coaches. Akshay interned and worked with various newspapers and the Public Relations...more