‘A romantic relationship is a two-way street that involves mutual understanding, mutual enjoyment, mutual effort, and mutual respect.’
You might have started your relationship on the same note for a balanced relationship. It must have been happy-go-lucky for some time, but then you realized things are falling apart. You are the only one trying to hold on to your relationship and making all the effort to be together. But, the question is ‘for how long?’
That’s when you may experience a feeling of ‘should I give up on love?’ or ‘should I wait?’ Such a dilemma could cause an emotional turmoil as you seek answers to your doubts. Keep reading this post as we share a few common signs in a relationship that direct you to give up and move ahead with your head held high.
When To Give Up On Someone You Love?
Rough patches are a part of every relationship. When both the partners are ready to overcome ups and downs together, you can have a healthy relationship. But if it is only you, then you may have to taste the bitterness alone. If you relate to these signs, then maybe it is time to give up on your partner.
1. Too many fights
When the disagreements between you and your significant other are never-ending and leading to more and more arguments, it could be a red flag of the relationship. Unresolved disputes may eventually turn humiliating and ungracious, leading to emotional stress. If you think you or your partner are fighting almost every day over silly reasons, then maybe you need to think about parting away.
2. Unfulfilled expectations
Every partner has certain needs or expectations in a good relationship. It could be emotional, physical, or financial. If your significant other is not trying to meet them even after you have communicated and waited for long, then you may have to reconsider your decision of being with them.
3. One-way sacrifices
Sacrifices in a relationship are a good way to show you support your partner. But sacrifice should be from both the stakeholders in a relationship. If the episodes of sacrifice continue only from your end, even for major decisions, then probably it’s a sign of an unhealthy relationship.
4. Closed communication
Open and transparent communication is the key to a healthy and rewarding relationship. But if you are hesitant or too scared of your partner to ask something or express your expectations, then the dissatisfaction may turn into a burden. If you are unable to confront your significant other and afraid to put out your deep feelings, then you may lose the stability in your relationship.
5. Breakup and patch up circle
Troubling and pampering each other looks charming in a romantic relationship. But in adult life, constant drifting and getting back together could become messy with time. Such instances in a relationship could likely lead to hiatus and may compel you to doubt your partner and your bond.
Abuse, in any form, should not be tolerated in a relationship. Your partner is not allowed to isolate, control, scare, or hurt you, irrespective of the scenario. When you start recognizing those signs, you should consider it as a red flag that can suffocate you with time.
Do you feel your partner is lying to you? Or do you check their social media handle or phone often? It could be as a result of past experience (cheating or gaslighting). If that resentment continues for long, it could make the relationship toxic. Trust is one of the main pillars of any bond, and if that starts shaking, it could be difficult to move ahead.
It is okay to have differences. You may like to visit a museum, while your partner may want to watch a movie. But if your core values are different, and you both contradict in every aspect of life, then such an incompatibility may doom your relationship.
Any of these signs are a red flag in a relationship, and that means you could give up on your partner. But you may have second thoughts about it. Would that be a mistake? Read further to know about it.
Giving Up On Love: Is It A Mistake?
Loving someone can never be wrong. But compromising, sacrificing, and carrying the entire load of the relationship all alone would be unacceptable. If you are in a relationship and still yearning for love, then the thought of ‘giving up on love’ must be troubling you. But why give up on love? Your partner failed to hold your hand and support you, even when you were always there for them. So instead of giving up on finding true love, give up on your partner and move on.
How To Give Up On Your Partner And Move On?
Giving up on your partner and working on yourself would help you heal. We have a few tips here.
1. Forgive your partner
‘Forgiveness says you are given another chance to make a new beginning.’
- Desmond Tutu
Your partner must have hurt your feelings. It must have been a painful experience for you. Forgetting whatever happened may not be possible, at least for some months. But you can try to forgive them. Be kind to yourself, and take a step forward to heal your wounds.
2. Love yourself
Sometimes, we blame ourselves for an unsuccessful relationship. But that would not help you recover. The right away to move on is by practicing self-love. Accept your flaws or mistakes, if any, in the relationship. Then remind yourself that you have done every possible thing to save your relationship, and it was not all your fault. Stop blaming and start loving yourself.
3. Cut off the ties
It is essential to separate yourself not only physically but also emotionally. Disconnecting from the fantasy bond is one of the essential steps of giving up on your partner. It could be difficult, but it will help you focus on yourself. Otherwise, that person might become your weakness, and their thoughts would always hover over your mind.
4. Experience the grief
Dissociation from your partner brings agony. You may have to go through the stages of denial, anger, isolation, depression, and then acceptance. But, all through these stages, you have to accept grief. Don’t try to hide your feelings and emotions. The more you do, the more difficult it becomes to give up. Accept your pain and help yourself in the recovery process.
5. Don’t rush
The heartbreak is painful. You need to give yourself time as an essential step in the healing process. Remember, there are no quick fixes for the matters of the heart. It’s okay if you take weeks or months; don’t work in haste.
6. Live your life
You may take baby steps and make plans. Invest your energy and time in activities you like to do. Distract yourself from the thoughts of the past and use the time to work on yourself. Indulge in the hobby that you left, talk to your friends, go on a vacation, and live your life without depending on anyone else.
7. Establish a routine
Fix a daily routine for yourself. I would start working out in the morning. I would cook a healthy meal for my dinner. I would go for a walk during weekends. I would spend time with my family once a week. These little things are a part of the self-motivation that you require to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
8. Seek professional help
Sometimes, controlling emotions could be too tough. In such a case, you may require support from outside. If you are unable to open up to your family or friends, you may talk to a therapist. They can help you cope with your emotions, solve your mental issues, and change your daily habits. There’s no harm in opening up to a professional. Try it and find a positive difference in your life.
When it is only you trying to make the relationship work, it is actually the end of it. All your efforts would go in vain, and that’s when you have to give up on your significant other. However, giving up doesn’t mean you lose faith in love. It means to dissociate with your partner to work on yourself and find a new ray of sunshine. Remember, love is all about contentment. If you are not getting that from your partner, you need to move on.