When And How To Ask For A Second Date?

Image: Shutterstock


First dates are usually incredible. If you had a wonderful time, you would want to ask them out on a second date. You wish to see them again but are unsure how to ask them as you do not want to look desperate or turn them off. Asking for a second date can be tricky as you may not know if your date wants it too. They may have been friendly and polite to you on the first date, but you cannot tell if they were only courteous.

Keep reading this post as we give you some useful tips to ask for a second date and tell you when to do it. Keep scrolling and see what you need to do to win your second date.

When To Ask For A Second Date?

The most difficult question in the dating game is ‘when to ask for a second date?’ Firstly, stop stressing about it. You may be worried that asking immediately may make you look desperate. However, asking them out after a few days may make them lose interest in you. The answer to this question is to gauge the situation and act accordingly.

For instance, if you have known your date for a long time and are sure that you want to see them again, you can suggest a second date while on your first date itself. While having a conversation, you can offer to take them to a place they would like to go. However, do not force but suggest and observe their reaction. If they look eager to join you, you can follow it up after your date. If not, leave it aside.

Also, do not rush into things just because your date went well. Wait for a day or two or a maximum of five days. Observe and understand your feelings. If you are sure to meet them again, message or call them for a meetup. Do not ask and then bail on them. Suggest where you could go and try to know their preferences.

15 Tips To Ask For A Second Date

Now that you know when to ask, you might be wondering how to ask for a second date? Well, here are some handy tips to keep in mind.

1. Ensure a smooth first date

The key to a second date lies in the first date. On your first date, dress well and smell good. Do not arrive too late and do not drink too much. Avoid touchy topics such as past relationships, politics, and religion. Also, do not peek into your phone during the date. All these small gestures will help you ask for a second date with confidence.

2. Pay attention

While on your first date, ask what they like to eat and their dream destination. You can use their answers as a pretext to go on your next date. Tell them how you would like to explore that place and enjoy their favorite food together.

3. Talk about the second date on the first date

If you wish to see your date again, start talking about it on the first one itself. For instance, if you have a club membership, tell them about the facilities they could enjoy if they join you next time. In case they look interested, elaborate and grab their interests.

4. Avoid oversharing

Do not make the mistake of divulging too much personal information on your first date. Stick to general information and a handful of experiences. Telling them everything about yourself in the first meeting itself makes you lose the mystery element, and you may bore them.

5. Avoid interrogating them

To have any chance at a second date, you need to keep the first one fun and enjoyable. Do not sit and bombard them with your curious questions like a job interviewer. Instead, share a little about yourself, ask a little about them, and then talk on common topics.

6. Suggest a convenient place

Whenever you decide to call or text for a second date, ensure that the place you suggest is convenient for them to visit. This way, they will have no reason to cancel, and you would easily be able to make it without any second thoughts.

7. Approach confidently

The fear of rejection may make you nervous to ask them out again. But don’t worry and be confident. They wouldn’t see your quaking hands or sweaty palms, so show your confidence talking firmly over the phone or send a unique or charming text—to make it difficult for them to refuse.

8. Show your humorous side

Try to approach in a fun and casual way. For instance, ‘There is so much left to do on a date…Jump rope, play paintball, build sandcastles… Don’t worry. We can catch up if we meet again. Wanna try?’ Do not be too corny or use a lousy pickup line—it may reduce your chance of getting a second date.

9. Do not force them

If you text them for a second date in the sweetest possible manner, and they do not give you a positive response, it means they are not interested, so do not bother them. Your first date may have been great, and you two must have hit it off instantly, but that doesn’t guarantee a second date. When you sense reluctance or delay from their end, you may move on.

10. Be clear about your intentions

Many first dates end on vague suggestions such as ‘I’ll call you’ or ‘Let’s do this again,’ leaving an air of uncertainty for the other person. Instead, if you are sure, clearly ask for a second date. You can ask them if they would like to see you again. It will avoid misunderstandings and confusion.

11. Make a quick plan

If they have agreed for a second date, do not waste much time and make a good plan. Do not make it too romantic as it might make your date uncomfortable. Remember to ask about it within a day of agreeing for a second date.

12. Avoid inviting them to your place

You may be a great cook and may want to invite them to show off your cooking skills. In any case, do not invite them to your place. If they suggest it themselves and you are okay with it, then go ahead. But do not do it otherwise. Always stick to a neutral place for the first few dates.

13. Suggest without asking

It is a bold idea, but you can give it a try only if you share a good rapport with your date. You have to directly tell them to be at a place without asking them about it. For instance, text them, ‘That Mexican restaurant is finally open, and you will love their Burrito. Let’s go at seven today.’

14. Send a slight flirty text

If you found your date flirty, you can send a mildly flirty text to ask for a second date. For instance, try something like ‘After giving a deep thought, I have concluded that another dose of your infectious laughter can help me stay sane for some more time. Care to help?

15. Avoid texting between dates

Texting between dates may not be such a great idea as you never know which message of yours might become a deal-breaker. Instead, give them a call if possible or message them to see them again in person. Avoid getting too friendly until you are sure they are interested in you.

Keep these tips in mind when asking for a second date. Do not be disheartened if their response is not affirmative. Dating is never easy, and it takes a while to get it right. But never fail to put your best foot forward. You never know when you might meet your match!