When And How To Ask For A Second Date?

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You just had an incredible first date, filled with laughter and meaningful talks. You wish to meet them again soon but don’t know how to ask for a second date. Asking your love interest for a second date can be tricky as you don’t know if they want it too.

Also, you don’t want to sound desperate or do anything that might turn them off. So, keep reading this post if you aren’t sure of the right approach to ask for a second date with grace and dignity. Here we have shared some useful tips about when and how to ask them for a second date.

When To Ask For A Second Date?

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The most difficult question in the dating game is ‘when to ask for a second date?’ Firstly, stop stressing about it. You may be worried that asking immediately may make you look desperate. However, asking them out after a few days may make them lose interest in you. The answer to this question is to gauge the situation and act accordingly.

For instance, if you have known your date for a long time and are sure that you want to see them again, you can suggest a second date while on your first date itself. While having a conversation, you can offer to take them to a place they would like to go. However, do not force but suggest and observe their reaction. If they look eager to join you, you can follow it up after your date. If not, leave it aside.

Also, do not rush into things just because your date went well. Wait for a day or two or a maximum of five days. Observe and understand your feelings. If you are sure to meet them again, message or call them for a meetup. Do not ask and then bail on them. Suggest where you could go and try to know their preferences.

14 Tips To Ask For A Second Date

Now that you know when to ask, you might be wondering how to ask for a second date? Well, here are some handy tips to keep in mind.

1. Ensure a smooth first date

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The key to a second date lies in the first date. On your first date, dress well and smell good. Do not arrive too late and do not drink too much. Avoid touchy topics such as past relationships, politics, and religion. Also, do not peek into your phone during the date. All these small gestures will help you ask for a second date with confidence.

2. Pay attention

While on your first date, ask what they like to eat and their dream destination. You can use their answers as a pretext to go on your next date. Tell them how you would like to explore that place and enjoy their favorite food together.

3. Wait till the end of the first date

It may not be a good idea to talk about the second date on the first one itself. However, you may consider waiting till the end of the first date to see if they give you any instances of meeting again.

4. Avoid oversharing

Do not make the mistake of divulging too much personal information on your first date. Stick to general information and a handful of experiences. Telling them everything about yourself in the first meeting itself makes you lose the mystery element, and you may bore them.

5. Avoid interrogating them

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To have any chance at a second date, you need to keep the first one fun and enjoyable. Do not sit and bombard them with your curious questions like a job interviewer. Instead, share a little about yourself, ask a little about them, and then talk on common topics.

6. Suggest a convenient place

Whenever you decide to call or text for a second date, ensure that the place you suggest is convenient for them to visit. This way, they will have no reason to cancel, and you would easily be able to make it without any second thoughts.

7. Approach confidently

The fear of rejection may make you nervous to ask them out again. But don’t worry and be confident. They wouldn’t see your quaking hands or sweaty palms, so show your confidence talking firmly over the phone or send a unique or charming text—to make it difficult for them to refuse.

8. Show your humorous side

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Try to approach in a fun and casual way. For instance, ‘There is so much left to do on a date…Jump rope, play paintball, build sandcastles… Don’t worry. We can catch up if we meet again. Wanna try?’ Do not be too corny or use a lousy pickup line—it may reduce your chance of getting a second date.

9. Do not force them

If you text them for a second date in the sweetest possible manner, and they do not give you a positive response, it means they are not interested, so do not bother them. Your first date may have been great, and you two must have hit it off instantly, but that doesn’t guarantee a second date. When you sense reluctance or delay from their end, you may move on.

10. Make a quick plan

If they have agreed for a second date, do not waste much time and make a good plan. Do not make it too romantic as it might make your date uncomfortable. Remember to ask about it within a day of agreeing for a second date.

11. Avoid inviting them to your place

You may be a great cook and may want to invite them to show off your cooking skills. In any case, do not invite them to your place. If they suggest it themselves and you are okay with it, then go ahead. But do not do it otherwise. Always stick to a neutral place for the first few dates.

12. Suggest without asking

It is a bold idea, but you can give it a try only if you share a good rapport with your date. You have to directly tell them to be at a place without asking them about it. For instance, text them, ‘That Mexican restaurant is finally open, and you will love their Burrito. Let’s go at seven today.’

13. Send a slight flirty text

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If you found your date flirty, you can send a mildly flirty text to ask for a second date. For instance, try something like ‘After giving a deep thought, I have concluded that another dose of your infectious laughter can help me stay sane for some more time. Care to help?

14. Avoid texting between dates

Texting between dates may not be such a great idea as you never know which message of yours might become a deal-breaker. Instead, give them a call if possible or message them to see them again in person. Avoid getting too friendly until you are sure they are interested in you.

Frequently Asked Questions

1. What does a second date mean to a guy?

If a guy asks you out on a second date, it may mean he is interested in knowing you better. So, if you also share the same feelings, make sure you use the second date to know them and form a good connection.

2. Is it okay to kiss on the second date?

If both partners agree, you may kiss on a second date. However, ask for consent before making a move. You may observe your partner’s body language to understand if they are interested.

If your first date went well, you liked the person and want to meet up again, but you’re not sure how to ask for a second date, above mentioned tips, such as approaching with confidence, making quick plans, being clear about your intentions, proposing a convenient place, and so on, may be helpful. But, before asking them for a second date, let yourself a day or two to sift through your emotions. Don’t get disheartened if you haven’t received an affirmative response; dating is never easy. But put your best efforts at all times since you never know when you’ll run into your soul mate!

Infographic: Tips To Make Sure That Your Second Date Goes Smoothly

Now that you have secured a second date, what can you do to ensure it is not the last? The following infographic is your answer to all those questions. We have included a list of tips you should keep in mind to ensure you have a successful second date. So, give it a thorough read and save it to keep it handy.

second date tips [infographic]
Illustration: MomJunction Design Team

Key Pointers

  • If you have had a great first date, you can’t wait to go on a second date.
  • However, wait for a few days and look through these simple tips to note before approaching your loved one for a second date.
  • Pick a convenient location, be confident, and charm them with a sweet invite text to make your second date memorable.

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Ratika Pai

Ratika has experience writing in various fields including finance, education, lifestyle, and entertainment. After her masters degree in Commerce, she acquired a PG Diploma in Communication and Journalism from Mumbai University. She is inquisitive about human relationships and likes to study people and how they manage their relationships, during her freetime. At MomJunction, Ratika writes insightful and informative articles on...
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Donna Murphy

(BSW, MSW, RSW Cert. Ad.Ed)
Donna Murphy is a social worker and operates a private practice in Calgary, Alberta, Canada. In her 15 years of experience, she has seen individuals and couples transform their lives when they begin to make changes within. As a result, Donna has undertaken a writing project that will assist people in first understanding themselves and second changing their lives for...
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