How To Take A Relationship Slow: 15 Useful Tips

How To Take A Relationship Slow

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When you are in a new relationship, everything feels amazing. You experience the joy of the budding romance and look forward to the future with excitement and anticipation. The beautiful moments are crucial for laying the foundation of the relationship. Moving too fast might not give you enough time to build a strong relationship and even fizzle out the spark.

Going steady can give you the time to gauge your true feelings and help you know if you are compatible. You would also get a chance to know the person better and spot the red flags, if any. Keep reading this post to know how to take a relationship slow.

15 Ways To Take A Relationship Slow

Read on to learn a few effective ways to take a relationship slow and steady while keeping the fun alive.

1. Be upfront from the beginning

Partners need to be on the same page for a smooth and loving relationship. If they have different perceptions and expectations, the relationship could fail. An honest discussion from the get-go helps build trust. So, sit down and talk to your partner if you want to go slow.

Be upfront about your feelings for them, and let them know why you wish to take it slow. Be clear about your expectations and give them the time and space to think. You two can then move ahead mutually.

2. Avoid discussing the future

When your relationship has just begun, and you are sharing beautiful moments, it is natural to start thinking about the future. While it is great to plan for the future, thinking about it in the early stages may put undue pressure on the budding relationship.

So, once you two have decided to take things slow, live in the moment. Take each day as it comes, and enjoy your time together. You will get ample time to discuss serious matters as the relationship progresses.

3. Keep your emotions in check 

It is easy to lose yourself in the magic of a new relationship. You tend to fall hard at the speed of light if you do not think about the consequences. It could be detrimental if you want to know each other well and take the relationship slow. You might end up getting hurt if you get involved too much, too fast. So, keep your emotions in check. Try to think practically and clearly before blindly rushing and deciding anything.

4. Refrain from labels

 Our society expects us to define and name every relationship. Social norms mold us to believe that we should state ourselves as a couple when we start dating.

While it is necessary to label your relationship eventually, you don’t have to do that too early. In the beginning, having fun and being happy is important, and not the labels. So, quit worrying and allow your relationship to bloom naturally.

5. Keep it casual and light 

Getting too involved early on and professing your love might alarm your partner if they don’t feel the same way yet. Also, it could be infatuation and not love. Allow yourself enough time to distinguish the difference, by keeping the relationship light and casual in the beginning.

The slower pace can give you the opportunity to understand your feelings without any pressure. So, don’t jump into confessing your emotions right away; instead, enjoy spending time together.

6. Wait before you get physically intimate 

Openly communicate about physical intimacy and respect each other’s boundaries. Ideally, if you are taking things slow, it is best to wait for a while before getting physically intimate.

Getting hot and heavy early on can cloud your vision and prevent you from thinking objectively. So, spend some time together and get to know each other well before getting intimate. The comfort and trust between you two would slowly develop, turning your relationship more beautiful and memorable.

7. Pace out your time together 

If you like each other and want to know more about each other, spending more time together makes complete sense. However, if you wish to take the relationship slow, it’s best not to meet every day. Plan your week such that you spend the weekends or any day or two with them and then give them some space for other things on the other days. It will help you maintain a sense of excitement and anticipation. If they insist on regular meet-ups, give them justified reasons about your other commitments and suggest another time.

8. Experiment different stuff together                                                                                  

The honeymoon phase of the relationship is a beautiful time. You are still in the process of exploring each other’s personalities and choices. Apart from dinner dates, try out playing sports, visiting new places, or planning a picnic.

Trying out different things when together will give you a chance to assess each other in different scenarios and help you understand the relationship’s long-term potential. Constant surprises will also keep the element of mystery and novelty in the relationship alive. Go ahead, be unpredictable, and explore new activities, new places, new cuisines together to make the most of your time.

9. Make sure your world doesn’t revolve around them

It is natural to give time and attention to a new relationship, but make time for your friends, family, career, and interests as well. The person you like can be an essential part of your life but do not make your life revolve only around them. Figuring out the right balance is the key. Invest time in making your life better, too.

10. Avoid fixating on the person 

Being in a new relationship gives you a heady feeling. The attraction for each other is apparent, and the desire to be a part of each other’s lives is strong. Sometimes, the infatuation can turn into an obsession. Before you know it, you may be stalking their social media pages, incessantly calling/texting them, giving them late-night calls, and constantly thinking about them.

The fixation might negatively impact your life and scare your partner away. So, pull the plug on unhealthy behavior and let the emotions flow naturally.

11. Be mindful of your relationship’s direction 

It is good to take a relationship slowly, but you should also keep in mind where and how you want it to go. Do you want a casual partner who shares similar interests, or are you looking for a long-term relationship that culminates into marriage? It could take a while to reach a particular point, but it is essential to take baby steps in the direction where you want it to go.

12. Wait before introducing them to your family

When you are not 100% sure of your relationship, wait for a while before introducing your partner to your loved ones. In the early stages, you are in the process of getting acquainted, and having more people involved in the equation might put extra strain on the budding relationship. It might even scare your partner. Such a big step is too premature since it is too early to tell how the relationship will progress with time. So, enjoy your time together and leave the introductions for another time.

13. Refrain from becoming too controlling and possessive

When you wish to take the relationship slowly, you might not be meeting your partner every day. In such a situation, there is a possibility of feeling insecure. It may lead to possessive and controlling behavior. Such behavior could be harmful for any relationship.

In a healthy relationship, it is essential to respect each other’s boundaries. Every partner needs breathing space and time to do other things. If you try to control your partner’s life and interfere in every aspect, it might suffocate them.

14. Avoid revealing everything about yourself too soon 

Revealing everything about your life at the beginning could be counterproductive when you are trying to take a relationship slow. It would even take the mystery and anticipation out from your bond. Sharing crucial information about your personal life might also make you vulnerable in front of your partner too soon.

So, do not put all your cards on the table as soon as you enter the relationship. Instead, give yourself enough time to determine if your partner is trustworthy and has your best interest at heart before divulging too much personal information.

15. Wait before you move in 

During the honeymoon phase of the relationship, your feelings are so intense that you wish to be together 24/7. You might even get the idea of moving in. However, before you go ahead with this, take a step back and think.

Moving in together is a big step in any relationship. It involves a lot of adjustments and could be complicated too. It is important to spend quality time together and understand each other before making such a choice. Otherwise, there is a chance you might get too involved, and it would be painful if the relationship doesn’t work out.

 When you decide to move at a slower pace, you can experience the euphoria of your love for longer and get time to build a strong and lasting relationship. If you are worried that taking it slow could make your partner lose interest, communicate your reasons clearly, and give them time to decide. Remember, the relationship can stand any test of time if you are meant to be together.

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Shikha Thakur

Shikha is a writer-turned-associate editor at MomJunction. Her core interest lies in writing articles that guide couples through their courtship to marriage and parenthood. She also specializes in baby names. Being a postgraduate in Human Resources, she likes understanding people and their relationships. This reflects in her relationship articles, where she deals with both the rosy and the grey side... more