How To Tell If Someone Is Lying About Cheating:12 Signs

In This Article

Are you being suspicious that your boyfriend or husband is cheating on you? Your gut feeling is saying something is not right, but they keep repeating they are honest with you. In this post, we talk about how to tell if someone is lying about cheating. The uncertainty will drain your energy and will stress you out. However, nobody can conceal the truth for long, and your partner will someday make a mistake, and his lies will be exposed. Read on as we list out the signs of cheating.

12 Ways To Tell If Someone Is Lying About Cheating

When you broach the topic, keep these signs in mind to clear your doubts about their behavior.

1. They fail to maintain eye contact

People who lie avoid eye contact

Image: Shutterstock

When you talk or ask about cheating, do they look here and there? If yes, that could be a sign of lying. People who lie avoid eye contact as they fear you might see the truth in their eyes. They might act normal, but they will not look at you, even if you ask them to.

2. They make aggressive eye contact

While avoiding eye contact is quite common in a lying partner, looking at you intently is also a sign of lying. In this case, they know that avoiding eye contact can make you figure out the truth. So, they try to make it up by looking at you continuously. If your partner is looking at you unblinkingly in a way that creeps you out, it might be a red flag.

3. They become defensive

When you confront them, they might become defensive

Image: Shutterstock

Becoming defensive could be a common sign of a lying partner. When you confront them, they might overreact and become defensive. Even when you ask an innocent question, they tend to take offense and respond harshly. In some cases, they might even project their feelings on you and accuse you of being a liar.

4. They change their behavior

If your partner is suddenly taking more care of you or, inversely, it could be because they are lying about cheating and want to compensate for the guilt. In this case, asking them about a sudden change might make them defensive, or they might downright deny it.

5. They change their habits

Every person has set habits, and if they unexpectedly pick up new habits or drop some old ones, it could be because they are lying about cheating. For example, they suddenly stopped smoking and started going to the gym. They are most probably trying to impress their new partner.

6. They become busy

A schedule that changes abruptly could point towards a lying partner

Image: Shutterstock

A schedule that changes abruptly could point towards a lying partner. For example, if they come home late every day and do not answer your calls, or they don’t take calls in front of you—these could be some cues to watch out for.

7. They speak differently

Did your partner start talking in a higher or lower pitch, faster or slower than usual? They might resort to coughing or frequent throat-clearing to cover up their awkwardness. They might even evade your questions by giving vague answers such as “I don’t know” or “leave me alone.” Such unwelcomed gestures could be a sign of lying.

8. They display a different body language

When you ask your partner about cheating, pay attention to their nonverbal communication. When they are lying, they lean away from you and keep their body closed, which indicates they are not open to any questions or suggestions.

Did you know?
When a person crosses both arms and legs, it indicates that they have emotionally withdrawn from the conversation (1).

9. They hesitate

 A liar will hesitate and think about their answer before responding

Image: Shutterstock

While hesitating is common in truthful partners too, when combined with any of the other signs shows your partner is lying about cheating. A normal person usually starts talking immediately when you ask them a question. But a liar will hesitate and think about their answer before answering. This will give you a clue about your partner’s proclivities.

10. They have dilated pupils

Your pupils dilate when you think harder. It is an involuntary action, and no one can learn to control it. This is a major giveaway if your partner is lying about cheating. They might be good with their words, actions, and body language, but this is one thing they cannot control. Hence, they avoid eye contact.

11. They post vague stuff on social media

Usually, a cheating partner is careful about what goes online. They make sure they do not upload any incriminating pictures or messages. However, at times they might slip and post something out of emotion. If they told you they were at the office all night but posted a picture of a pint of beer, you need to be cautious.

12. They have a history of lying

For such partners, lying is just a way to get out of tight corners

Image: Shutterstock

If you know that your partner has lied in the past for some seemingly minor incidents, it is a good cause to suspect them of lying about cheating too. For such partners, lying is just a way to get out of tight corners. They don’t worry too much about consequences and only want a way out of this particular confrontation. They might forget about the lie soon and have no scruples about lying again.

Infidelity should have zero tolerance, but it is also important to avoid hasty decisions. These signs may teach you how to tell if someone is lying about cheating. However, careful observation is necessary as no single sign can be conclusive and may have its explanation when seen from a different perspective. Observe the changes in their behavior and body language over time and confront them when you see a series of signs over and over again. You may decide what to do next once you are sure they have been lying about cheating.

Infographic: Talking About What Happened And Why It Happened

Getting cheated can trigger a hurricane of emotions. You feel angry, hurt, betrayed, shattered, and left out. However, you need to calm yourselves and seek answers as to why your partner turned unfaithful. Our infographic brings a compilation of questions one should ask their disloyal partner to get an insight into what they want. Getting that clarity is essential to decide the relationship’s future.

questions to ask an unfaithful partner [infographic]
Illustration: MomJunction Design Team

Key Pointers

  • A person who cheats or lies may fail to maintain eye contact and look here and there while you ask something.
  • Aggressive eye contact or not blinking at all can also be a sign of lying when cheating.
  • Some people may pick up new habits or drop old ones when they cheat and lie.


MomJunction's articles are written after analyzing the research works of expert authors and institutions. Our references consist of resources established by authorities in their respective fields. You can learn more about the authenticity of the information we present in our editorial policy.
Was this article helpful?
The following two tabs change content below.