122 Cute And Funny Jokes To Tell Your Crush

Laughter is the path to your loved one’s heart. It helps you grab their attention and cast your magic on them. If you are looking for funny jokes to tell your crush, then your search ends here.

A clean sense of humor and spontaneity can woo your crush, leaving them spell-bound with your cuteness. This exhaustive list has several jokes that may bring an instant smile to your loved one’s face and will impress them with your prowess to make the environment fun and lively.

In This Article

121 Funny Jokes To Tell Your Crush

  1. Hey. I’m an unemployed guy with a certificate in cuddling, a diploma in caring, and a degree in kissing. Do you have a job for me?
  1. If I were a virus, I would infect you with my love.
  1. You must be a red blood cell because you take the oxygen out of my lungs and bring it right to my heart.
  1. My name is Microsoft. Can I crash at your place tonight?
  1. You are like dandruff because I just cannot get you out of my head, no matter how hard I try.
  1. If I could rearrange the letters, I would put the U and I together.
  1. Are you Hurricane Katrina? Cause you’re blowing me away.
  1. Are you Netflix? Because I could watch you for hours.
  1. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ben. Ben, who? Been thinking about you all day.
  1. Let’s commit the perfect crime together. I’ll steal your heart, and you can steal mine.
  1. Do you have a bandage? Because I just scraped my knee falling for you.
  1. Why should you never marry a tennis player? Because love means nothing to them!
  1. Are you Willy Wonka’s daughter? Because you look sweet and delicious.
  1. Are you a camera? Because every time I look at you, I smile.
  1. Want to hear a joke about pizza? Nevermind, it’s too cheesy.

    Laughter can be a great way to impress your crush

    Image: Shutterstock

  1. I may annoy you, and you might want to kill me… I give you permission, but on one condition. Don’t shoot me in the heart, because that’s where you are!
  1. Are you a dictionary? Cause you are adding meaning to my life.
  1. Are you my phone charger? Because without you, I’d die.
  1. What did the patient with the broken leg say to their doctor? Hey doc, I have a crutch on you.
  1. Excuse me, could you tell me what time it is? I have to remember the exact moment I met the person of my dreams.
  1. Do you have any raisins? How about a date?
  1. Can I borrow a kiss from you? I promise you that I will give it back.
  1. Can I take a picture of you so Santa knows what I want for Christmas?
  1. Can you take me to the doctor? Because I just broke my leg falling for you.
  1. You may fall from the sky, you may fall from a tree, but the best way to fall… is in love with me.
  1. Did you go to bed early last night? Looking at you, I think you got your beauty sleep.
  1. You are just like my car—you drive me crazy.
  1. Why didn’t the skeleton ask his crush out? Because he didn’t have the guts.
  1. Can I borrow a quarter? [“What for?”] I want to call my mom and tell her I just met the man/woman of my dreams.
  1. Are you the sun? Because my whole world revolves around you.
  1. Could you please step away from the bar? You’re melting all the ice!
  1. I was wondering if you had an extra heart—mine seems to have been stolen.
  1. Did you get your license suspended for driving so many guys crazy?
Quick Tip
You may also try sharing a goofy or bizarre personal experience with your crush to make them laugh and impress them.
  1. Are you from Korea? Because you could be my Seoul mate.
  1. Hey, can I follow you home? (What?) Oh sorry, it’s just my parents told me to follow my dreams.
  1.  Boy: So, you are going to be a butterfly all night?
    Girl: (puzzled look)
    Boy: You know, pretty to see but hard to catch!
  1. “Hi, I’m writing a phone book, can I have your number?”
  1. Boy: Hi, is your name Google?
    Girl: No, Why?
    Boy: Because you have everything I’m looking for!
  1. Boy: Are your parent’s bakers?
    Girl: Why?
    Boy: Cause they made a cutie pie!
  1. You have repainted my life with colors that were previously unknown to me!
  1. If I freeze, it’s not a computer virus. I was just stunned by your beauty.
  1. Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I pass by you again?
  1. Every morning gives me a reason to think logically so I can know who shines more, you or the sun.
  1. We must be subatomic particles because I feel a strong force between us.
  1.  Your smile must be a black hole, nothing can escape its pull.
  1. A girl in a restaurant asked me, “Are you single?”
    I happily replied, “Yes.”
    She took away the extra chair in front of me.
  1. Do you have a name or can I just call you mine?
  1. I’m new in town. Could you give me directions to your apartment?
  1. What did the chocolate syrup say to the ice cream? “I’m sweet on you!”

    A joke with your special one can double the fun

    Image: Shutterstock

  1. I feel so tired every time I meet you… Why? Because whenever I look into your eyes, I can’t find the way out.
  1. Are you the energizer bunny because you keep going and going through my mind.
  1. Do you play soccer? Because you’re a keeper!
  1. They say Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. Apparently, no one has ever been standing next to you.
  1. I think you might have something in your eye. Oh, hold on, that’s just a twinkle!
  1. I’m no photographer, but I can picture us together.
  1. I’m sorry I wasn’t a part of your past. Can I make it up by being in your future?
  1. Are you a singularity? Not only are you attractive, but the closer I get to you, the faster time seems to slip by.
  1. I’ll be Burger King, and you be McDonald’s. I’ll have it my way, and you’ll be lovin’ it.
  1. Excuse me, miss. Can I have the time? I’d check my watch, but I can’t take my eyes off you.
  1. I was blinded by your beauty; I’m going to need your name and phone number for insurance purposes.
  1. You’re cuter than a puppy at an animal shelter. I want to take you home!
  1. Well, here I am! What are your other two wishes?
  1. If I followed you home, would you keep me?

    A good joke can brighten your crush's mood and de-stress them

    Image: Shutterstock

  1. Are you Greek? Because you look like a goddess to me.
  1. Girl, you’re like a car accident. Because I can’t look away.
  1. You must be an angel because your texture mapping is so divine!
  1. What happens if you eat yeast and shoe polish? Every morning you will rise and shine!
  1. What did the mayonnaise say when someone opened the refrigerator door. Close the door I am dressing!
  1. My therapist and I have been trying to figure out why I seem to have lost my mind. Then I realized that it’s all your fault. I’m crazy for you.
  1. Are you a magician? Because whenever I look at you, everyone else disappears!
  1. Do I know you? Because you look a lot like my next girlfriend.
  1. For some reason, I was feeling a little off today. But when you came along, you turned me on.
  1. Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got fine written all over you.
  1. Is there an airport nearby, or is it my heart taking off?
  1. Would you grab my arm, so I can tell my friends an angel has touched me?
  1. Did the sun come out, or did you smile at me?
  1. Kiss me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist. Right?
  1. Excuse me, I’m a little short on cash. Mind if we shared a cab home?
  1. I have been developing wrinkles from smiling too much. Stop being so lovely! You’re driving me crazy.
  1. Me without you is like a nerd without braces, a shoes without laces, aSentenceWithoutSpaces.
Point to consider
Funny conversations can work wonders while getting close to your crush. So, enjoy the lightness that comes with a funny conversation, and who knows if something wonderful is on cards.
  1. I’d say God Bless you, but it looks like he already did.
  1. You don’t need keys to drive me crazy.
  1. You remind me of a magnet because you sure are attracting me!
  1. I’m no mathematician, but I’m pretty good with numbers. Tell you what, give me yours and watch what I can do with it.
  1. Sorry, but you owe me a drink. [Why?] Because when I looked at you, I dropped mine.
  1. You must be a broom, because you just swept me off my feet.
  1. Hello. Cupid called. He wants to tell you that he needs my heart back.
  1. My buddies bet me that I wouldn’t be able to start a conversation with the hottest person in the bar. Do you want to buy some drinks with their money?
  1. Excuse me, I just noticed you noticing me and I just wanted to give you notice that I noticed you too.
  1. There must be something wrong with my eyes. I can’t take them off you.
  1. Hey, you’re pretty, and I’m cute. Together we’d be Pretty Cute.
  1. Hi, how was heaven when you left it?
  1. Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?
  1. If I had a star for every time you brightened my day, I’d have a galaxy in my hand.
  1. Is your name WiFi? Because I feel a connection.
  1. Are you religious? Because you’re the answer to all my prayers.
  1. This girl on Tinder asked me why I have an unlit cigarette in my picture. I told her I’m just looking for matches.
  1. I’m in a long-distance relationship. My girlfriend is in the future.
  1. Excuse me, I think you have something in your eye. Oh wait, it’s just a sparkle.
  1. How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend? He gave her a ring.
  1. I just got this sick job at the Calendar factory. Unfortunately, I still can’t get a date.
  1. Why do manly ghosts have so much trouble dating? Women can see right through them!
  1. I want our relationship to be like a Nintendo DS cartridge. If we have any problems, take it out, blow on it, and put it back in.
  1. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe.
  1.  I know you’re busy today, but can you add me to your to-do list?
  1. Hi, can I follow you home tonight? Sorry, that came out a little strong, my mom always told me to follow my dreams.
  1. I’m afraid someone might ask you to leave here pretty soon. You’re just making everyone else look bad.
  1. Excuse me, but I think I dropped something. MY JAW!
  1. This must be the 8th castle because I just found my princess.
  1. What did the boy cat say to the girl cat on Valentine’s Day? You’re purrr-fect for me!

    Joking a great way of spreading positivy to your crush

    Image: Shutterstock

  1. Now, what’s on the menu? Me-n-u
  1. Don’t be scared if a man in a red suit puts you in a big red bag. He’s only fulfilling my Christmas wish of receiving you.
  1. You’re so beautiful that last night you made me forget my pickup line.
  1. You’re sweeter than 3.14.
  1. Are you the square root of -1? Because you can’t be real.
  1. Forget hydrogen, you’re my number one element.
  1. I want you to have a candle-lit dinner and say those magical three words to you… Pay the bill!

    Tell funny jokes to your crush and make their day

    Image: Shutterstock

  1. Why did the skeleton go to the party alone? He had nobody to go with him.
  1. What do runners eat before a race? Nothing, they fast!
  1. What do you call someone with a rubber toe? Roberto.
  1. Hey, do you like Star Wars by any chance? Because “YODA” only one for me!

While you may be nervous in the company of your crush, remain cool and collected. You may share any of the jokes listed above with your crush to keep the conversation going and lighten the mood. However, don’t go overboard with your jokes, as they may come out as forced and frantic. Also, be careful to crack it up naturally and don’t force it in between conversations. In comedy, timing is important. So, select the appropriate time to say something hilarious while ensuring that your jokes do not make others uncomfortable.

Infographic: Funny Jokes To Tell Your Crush

We made a list of jokes you can share with your crush whenever you think the conversation is going downhill. With the help of these jokes, you can make your crush laugh out hard and make some good memories together. Who knows! They might even pick up on a few hints from them.

jokes to impress your crush (infographic)

Illustration: Momjunction Design Team

Get high-quality PDF version by clicking below.

Download Infographic in PDF version Download Infographic
Download Infographic in PDF version
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