201+ Funny Jokes To Tell Your Friends

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“In the sweetness of friendship let there be laughter, for in the dew of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed.” -Khalil Gibran

To enjoy a hilarious time with your best mates, our list of amusing gigs and senseless jokes to tell your friends can be kept handy. Imagine a lazy day with friends around, cracking the silliest jokes, pulling each other’s legs, and laughing your heart out. Wouldn’t that be a stress-busting hangout session? We bring you a collection of jokes that includes one-liners, testable fun jokes, contemporary ones, and some random ones – share them with your buddies and create hysterical memories for life.

201+ Hilarious And Funny Jokes To Tell Your Friends

Scroll through some interesting, corny, dumb, and funny jokes for friends and enjoy a great laughing session with each other.

Good Jokes To Tell Your Friends

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1. Did you know that best friends would not mind if your place is clean. All they need is beer.
2. My friend said I should do lunges to stay in shape. That would be a big step forward.
3. You may share all your secrets with me. They can be safe with my friends.
4. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
5. While I was wondering how the ball was turning bigger in size, my friend hit me with it.
6. What do you call a number that can’t stay in place? Roamin numeral.
7. Do you consider me your friend? Then be ready to pick my call 100 times a day.
8. Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers? He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them.
9. Yes buddy, I am ready to take a bullet from you. But only if you give me 1000 dollars.
10. I told my friend I needed a break, and now it won’t stop sending me Kit Kat bars.
11. What if I say that potatoes can quarrel as they cannot see eye to eye.
12. What does a house wear? Address.
13. My boyfriend wanted a holiday so I sat home.
14. I tried to make a belt out of watches, but it was a waist of time.
15. My best friend is like pepperoni on pizza. Nevermind, it sounds right to me.
16. How many tickles does an octopus need to laugh? Ten tickles.
17. Did you know that friends who like to work on algebra are called algebros?
18. Parallel lines have so much in common; still they’ll never meet.
19. My friend got all cut. What? Yeah, he’s gone bald.
20. How do you organize a space party? You “planet”!
21. Why do birds fly? That’s because it is easier than walking.
22. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite.
23. Zero praised eight that it has got a stylish belt.
24. Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded? There was nothing left but de-brie.
25. You can be my friend as you match my level of craziness.
26. I couldn’t figure out how lightning works, and then it struck me.
27. Can you fix broken tomatoes? Yes, make them into a paste.
28. I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
29. My boyfriend and I laughed and giggled at how happy we were. But I ended up laughing more.
30. Do you know who cleans the oceans? Mer-maids!
31. What does the plant drink? Ha ha. Root beer.
32. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.
33. Ocean and shore cannot talk, it can just wave.
34. What did one wall say to the other wall? “I’ll meet you at the corner!”
35. Art is the favorite subject of a pirate.
36. A person who sees a robbery in an Apple store is called – an “I-witness.”
37. Bumble gum is a favorite food of bumble bees.
38. What did one plate say to the other plate? “Lunch is on me!”
39. I don’t use soap as I’m super clean now.
40. How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut!
41. Did you know cows love movies?
42. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
43. Here’s a tip for ladies. If your boyfriend doesn’t compliment you, then let the man-go.
44. I told my friend I’m on a seafood diet. He asked, “Really, what’s that?” I replied, “I see food, and I eat it.”
45. Friends and good manners will carry you where money won’t go.” -Margaret Walker
46. My friend said he couldn’t figure out how to put his seatbelt on. I told him he was in a rut.
47. My best friend is a squirrel. He keeps driving me nuts.
48. What did one hat say to the other? You stay here. I will go on ahead.
49. I went to the doctor as I broke my arm in two places. He told me I shouldn’t have gone to those places.
50. Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut? He just needed a little space.
51. Did you know that bananas love slippers? Yes, it does.
52. A sleeping dinosaur is called – Dino-sore!
53. I have a stupid friend. How? She never minds walking with me in public.
54. What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work? A can’t opener.
55. ‘You look flushed!’ Said one toilet to the other.
56. What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus!
57. The celery of the gardener was too low, hence he left.
58. Why did the smartphone go to therapy? Because it had too many issues!
59. “You can always tell a real friend: when you’ve made a fool of yourself he doesn’t feel you’ve done a permanent job.” -Laurence J. Peter
60. I asked my computer for a joke, but it said it had a bad byte!

Dumb Jokes To Tell Your Friends

61. You can never listen to a construction joke as it is always ‘work in progress.’
62. I couldn’t figure out how to put my seatbelt on. Then it “clicked.”
63. What bottoms do clouds wear? Umm, thunderpants!
64. I was going to send you a joke through email, but it got stuck in the outbox.
65. The towel keeps asking if its job is to dry people or get wet.
66. Why was the computer cold? It left its Windows open!
67. My friend ate a clock. She said it was time-consuming.
68. My phone’s battery is like a drama queen. It dies at 20% and then overreacts!
69. Good news to share. I got a negative in my IQ test.
70. My phone is like a teenager – it is always silent and won’t listen to me.
71. Somebody told me to taste happiness after getting married. It’s been 10 years, and I haven’t tasted it yet.
72. Peter Pan always keeps flying because? He Neverlands!
73. What is the difference between in-law and outlaw? Well, the latter is welcomed.

Do remember

It is okay to joke about your wife and in-laws as long as they do not feel offended. Everyone should enjoy jokes but not at the expense of anyone’s feelings.

74. My pet cow tried to become an actor but couldn’t find a moo-vie role.
75. Dessert is the last sweet that you have as your marriage begins.
76. How does a snowman get around? By riding an “icicle”!
77. “People say ‘Bill, are you an optimist?’ And I say, ‘I hope so.’” –Bill Bailey
78. What did the big flower say to the little flower? “Hi, bud!”
79. “You know you’re working class when your TV is bigger than your bookcase.” – Rob Beckett
80. Did you hear about the tree that went to the dentist? It needed a root canal!
81. “Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn’t last long if you’re fat.” – Joe Lycett
82. Did you know how the barber won the race? He knew a shortcut.
83. The legend says money speaks. Mine only says ‘bye.’
84. What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business.
85. My husband says I cannot make decisions. I saw him and said, ‘You are right.’
86. Why don’t skeletons play music in church? Because they have no organs!
87. I had been to an emotional wedding. Why? Even the wedding cake was in tiers.
88. What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
89. Tell me the antonym or irony? Umm, wrinkly!
90. My friend asked me if I could help him move, but I’m not a genie. I told him I could give him a hand.
91. Did you see the tomato blushing? Well, yes. It was because it saw the salad dressing.
92. Did you hear about the kidnapping at the bakery? They whisked away the dough!
93. The teddy was so stuffed that it did not eat the food.
94. What’s a skeleton’s least favorite room in the house? The living room.
95. Every math book is sad as it is filled with too many problems.
96. My pet rock is always so stoned.
97. What is the nickname of a rich elf? It is welfy!
98. What do you call a fish that wears a crown? King Neptune.
99. Did you know mummies enjoy wrap music?
100. Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.

Mean Jokes For Kids

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101. My wife asked me to put her shoes on. I said, ‘they won’t fit me.’
102. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
103. What is the nickname of a fish without an eye? Fish!
104. You shouldn’t write with a broken pencil because? – it’s pointless!
105. What is the name of a bear without teeth? Umm, is it a gummy bear? Yes!
106. Why do mushrooms like partying? Because they are fungi!
107. A bee that can’t make up its mind is called? A maybe.
108. What has four legs and it flies? A garbage truck!
109. I’m friends with all electricians. We have great connections.
110. What is green in color but has wheels? Grass! How? Well, the second part is a lie.
111. Why is the sky so red? It is not! It is, in my imagination.
112. My broom was late. Because it over-swept last night.
113. Why are the Irish so wealthy? Because their capital is Dublin!
114. What do you call a sleeping bull? A bull-dozer.
115. What is Minnie Mouse’s favorite car? It’s a Minnie van.
116. What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backward? A receding hare-line.
117. How long were you in the hospital? No, I was of the same size.
118. What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain? A drizzly bear.
119. She sent the picture to the prison. Why? Because it was framed.
120. What do you call a group of musical whales? An orca-stra.
121. Lee doesn’t talk to anyone because he is lone-lee.
122. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? “Supplies!”

Quick tip

When sharing a joke with a child, ensure it is relevant to them. Boss jokes or drinking puns will not make them laugh as they won’t understand.

Jokes To Tell Friends Over Text

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123. My mobile phone needs glasses as it lost all the contacts.
124. How do you open a banana? With a mon-key!
125. Mom: Can I see your report card.
     Son: No.
     Mom: Why?
     Son: My friend took it away as he wanted to scare his sister.
126. Which is faster, hot or cold? Hot, because you can catch cold.
127. I have an employment joke but cannot tell you. Why? Because it doesn’t work.
128. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? Because they might crack up!
129. Why can’t sharks swim in pepper water? That might make them sneeze.
130. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.
131. Should I tell you a good knock-knock joke? Yes. Well, I’m not in a mood to open the door.
132. What do you call a fish that wears a bowtie? Sofishticated.
133. We have been friends since ages. Is it your bad influence or mine?
134. Why did the chicken go to the seance? To get to the other side.
135. I wanted to send you a short and crisp birthday message, here it is – HBD!
136. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.
137. I was waiting for your birthday for months. Why? For the treat.
138. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese.
139. I don’t think you are my best friend. All your selfies get more likes than mine.
140. What do you call a dog that can tell time? A watch dog.
141. You are not my best friend but my brother. Why? Our laziness levels match.
142. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.

Stupid Jokes To Tell Your Friends

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143. The scientist says you should not trust atoms. Why? Since they keep making up everything.
144. What do you call a man who can’t stand? Neil.
145. The computers went dancing to the Disc-Os.
146. What do you call a monkey in a minefield? A ba-boom.
147. If you are thinking of talking to giants, then don’t forget to use big words.
148. What do you call a woman who sets fire to her bills? Bernadette.
149. Why does the witch keep teaching? Because her favorite subject is SPELLING.
150. What do you call a man with a rubber toe? Roberto.
151. How does the sea greet? By waving.
152. What do you call a nun who walks in her sleep? A roamin’ Catholic.
153. Which dog can perform magic? Only a Labracadabrador.
154. What do you call a horse that likes arts and crafts? A hobby horse.
155. Can February March? No. But April May!
156. My boss told me to have a good day. So I went home.
157. Who are the ancestors of snow men? Water.
158. I have a fear of speed bumps. But I’m slowly getting over it.
159. I have a friend and enemy in one. How? She eats my food.
160. My friend said he knew a man with a wooden leg named Smith. I asked him what was the name of his other leg.
161. Trees have plenty of friends because they keep branching out.
162. What do you call a fish with two knees? A two-knee fish.

Corny Jokes To Tell Your Friends

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163. Friendship is like onions, it goes on and on.
164. What do you call a bear that has no ears? B.
165. My pet pig knows karate. Hence, I named it pork chop.
166. I went to the doctor, who told me I had acute appendicitis. I said, “That’s a compliment, right?”
167. What has many keys but usually only one or two locks? A keyboard.
168. My friend’s scarecrow received a trophy as it was outstanding.
169. I don’t trust stairs. They’re always up to something.
170. Planets love music. Which one? Nep-tunes
171. What do you call a lion that likes to rap? A hip-hop cat.
172. The vampire was sick. It was in the coffin.
173. I tried to sue the airline for losing my luggage. I lost my case.
174. Do you know what sea monsters have for lunch? Fish with ships.
175. I asked my date to meet me at the gym, but she never showed up. I guess the two of us aren’t going to work out.
176. Rabbits love to travel by hareplanes.
177. I have a joke about chemistry, but I’m afraid it won’t get a reaction.
178. The mushrooms went to the doctor as it got fungi.
179. I have a joke about pizza, but it’s too cheesy.
180. Which flowers are known as best kissers? None but tu-lips.
181. I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.
182. Who is a person with no nose and no body? Well, nobody knows.
183. I used to be a banker, but I lost interest.
184. When can a priest become a father? When he is a father-in-law.
185. What is sticky and brown? A brown stick.
186. What do you call a frog that is always happy? A hop-timist.
187. What is red and in a bottle? Red paint.
188. How do you know when the computer is heated? It will vent out.
189. What do you call a spider that likes to dance? A web spinner.
190. Which vehicle has lots of flies? A truck full of garbage.
191. I have a joke about scissors, and it’s cutting edge.
192. Bees have sticky hair? Because they use honeycombs.
193. What do you call a fly without wings? A walk.
194. Egg’s jokes don’t land on time because they crack mid-way.
195. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Tank. Tank who? You’re welcome.
196. The person who irons clothes, is called? Super hero. How? Because he is Iron man.
197. Why do turtles swim in saltwater? Because pepper water makes them sneeze.
198. Birds have the super power of sticking to each other using Vel-cro.
199. What do you call a cat that is good at chess? A check-mate.
200. Which factory always sells good products? Satis-factory.
201. I have a joke about time travel, but you didn’t like it.
202. What keeps running but doesn’t reach the destination? A fridge.
203. What does the falcon say to his friends before they go out for food? ‘Let us prey.’

Image: Stable Diffusion/MomJunction Design Team

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Infographic: Hilarious And Funny Jokes To Tell Your Friends

Telling a joke to a friend brings out a different kind of humor and laughter. No matter the joke, their reactions are always hilarious, making you feel like the greatest comedian or the worst one. So here are a few of the funniest jokes to share with your buddies.

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Illustration: Momjunction Design Team

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Get ready for a rib-tickling video! Overflowing with funny jokes, witty one-liners, and clever puns, it’s guaranteed to make your pals burst into uncontrollable laughter.

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Shikha ThakurMBA

Shikha is a writer-turned-editor at MomJunction, with over seven years of experience in the field of content. Having done a certification in Relationship Coaching, her core interest lies in writing articles that guide couples through their courtship to marriage and parenthood. She also specializes in baby names. A postgraduate in Human Resources from Jawaharlal Nehru Technological University, she likes understanding...more

Siddharth KesirajuMA, Certification in Relationship Coaching

Siddharth holds a certification in Relationship Coaching and a masters degree in communication and journalism from the University of Hyderabad. He has around seven years of experience in various fields of writing and editing. As an associate editor at MomJunction, Siddharth writes on Relationship and edits the writers' articles to meet the website's editorial standards. Previously, he worked in the...more