Man Vs Woman After Break Up: 10 Main Differences

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Breakup is one of the most traumatizing, and emotionally and physically draining experiences of life. All the dreams of a happy and beautiful life with our partner fall like a pack of cards. Eventually, everyone has to come to terms with the breakup and pick up the pieces of their life. In this post on man vs woman after break up, we bring you some differences in the way men and women cope with the breakup. As they say, men are from Mars and women are from Venus, so both these genders deal with their loss of love in their own style. Read on to know the differences.

Man vs Woman After Break up: 10 Differences

1. Handling the pain

Research by Binghamton University and University College London suggests that women experience the pain of a breakup more acutely in comparison with men (1). This could probably be due to the woman being more involved in the relationship than the man, as he may try to withdraw from the pain of their romance coming to an end.

2. Emotional hurt

The study also found that women are more emotionally distraught after a breakup, as they tend to invest more in a relationship (1). While the man in the relationship is also traumatized, his immediate emotional pain of a breakup could be less when compared with the woman.

3. Post-breakup stress

The trauma and stress after a breakup is deep for both the man and the woman. However, men are more stressed out and try hard to divert their minds and avoid the pain. Research done by Lancaster University says that women also fight the post-breakup blues but are capable of gathering themselves better (2).

4. Timeframe to overcome breakup

As per studies, men usually take much longer to come out of a breakup, as the loss hits them very deeply and lasts for a long time. On the contrary, women process the breakup by grieving and letting out their emotions, which helps them overcome the pain sooner (1).

5. Expressing anger or frustration

According to popular belief, the feelings of anger and resentment after a relationship ends are higher in men when compared with women. Men could channelize this anger as an intent to avenge their exes, while the propensity to exact revenge is far less in women.

6. Wanting to get back together

Generally, the desire to get back with their partner after a breakup is greater in men than in women. Initially, men love their newfound freedom, but once that wears off, they may want their ex back. Women too grapple with guilt but try to rationalize their emotions and get on with their life.

7. Healing process

Studies show that men never heal completely from a breakup as they simply learn to live with the pain (1). On the other hand, women are wired to recover and move on from the sadness of a relationship coming to an end.

8. Dent in self-confidence

It is believed that men view breakup as a sign of them not being attractive anymore, more so if it’s their partner who called it quits. This shatters their confidence to smithereens. In the case of women, the loss of a relationship has got to do with letting go of a deep and meaningful emotional bond.

9. Embracing the feelings

Conventional wisdom has it that while men may find it hard to embrace the pain, frustration, despair, and guilt attached to their breakup, women embrace these feelings more easily and turn the page. Women may be more attuned to reality and may reconcile to the breakup better than the man.

10. Seeking support

Studies reveal that women are willing to seek the help of loved ones and their inner circle or go to therapy to overcome the pain of a breakup (2). Dr. Ryan Boyd, lead researcher of the Lancaster University project, says, “Traditionally, women are more likely to identify relationship problems, consider therapy, and seek therapy than are men. When you remove the traditional social stigmas against men for seeking help and sharing their emotions, however, they seem just as invested in working through rough patches in their relationships as women.”

Key Pointers

  • Women tend to feel more hurt as they are often more involved in a relationship.
  • However, men seem to take a longer period of time to recover completely from heartbreak as compared to women.
  • Men usually think more about getting back with their ex than women do, as studies have shown that men never completely heal from a breakup.

While it is painful and heartbreaking for anyone to end a relationship they enjoyed and cherished, men and women may react differently to a breakup. While some believe that women experience more pain, Charlotte Entwistle, the lead author of a related study by Lancaster University, says, “Notably, the fact that the heartache theme was more commonly discussed by men emphasizes how men are at least as emotionally affected by relationship problems as women.” However, more than gender, an individual’s personality and emotional quotient may determine how they deal with a breakup.


MomJunction's articles are written after analyzing the research works of expert authors and institutions. Our references consist of resources established by authorities in their respective fields. You can learn more about the authenticity of the information we present in our editorial policy.
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Siddharth Kesiraju

Siddharth holds a master's degree in communication and journalism from the University of Hyderabad. He has around six years of experience in various fields of writing and editing. As an associate editor at MomJunction, Siddharth edits and ensures the articles are aligned with the website's editorial standards. Having done a certification course in Relationship Coaching, he also writes on Relationships.... more