9 Effective Measures To Control Your Anger During Pregnancy

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Pregnancy brings in a lot of emotions in us. Despite being happy in pregnancy, anger and agitation crop up unexpectedly at any time. Blame it on the hormones and biological processes that undergo in your body. They not only affect your health and wellbeing but also the relationship with your partner, family, friends and others.

Momjunction helps you understand the various stress factors that can cause anger in you, and ways to control anger during pregnancy.

Stress Factors That Cause Anger During Pregnancy

1. Hormonal changes:

Hormonal shifts during pregnancy make women more susceptible to emotions such as anger and mood swings .. They trigger anger out of issues that have been bothering you for some time. Your bodily changes make such feeling intense.

Identify such triggers and make an effort to resolve them so that they do not precipitate into an unpleasant situation. Take a deep breath before you respond to any upsetting situation.

2. Inequality:

Sociology professor Barbara Katz Rothman says that women face inequality and discrimination during pregnancy. For working women, employers make it difficult to grant maternity leave. In some cases, partners may not be interested in having a child, will be unsupportive and not perform their share of chores at the home.

Pregnant women are thus forced to struggle with daily life-work issues and begin to worry. These common sources can lead to anger.

In the book, What to expect when you’re expecting, Heidi Murkoff writes that most couples frequently fight during pregnancy due to the above issues. The best way to cope with anger and anxiety is to fight against discrimination at the workplace, and at home talk to your partner about your expectations from him.

3. Discomfort:

Discomforts such as nausea, fatigue, and abdominal  musclepain, backache and muscle cramps are a daily affair during pregnancy. These could increase the tendency to get angry, especially when you feel most of your needs are not being met.

You should take proactive measures to create a comfortable environment for yourself. For instance, make sure you get good sleep by arranging a comfortable bed and eat bland food so that it helps prevent nausea. Get yourself a spa or any relaxation treatment to ease the physical stress.

[ Read: Ways to Ease Stress During Pregnancy ]

4. Fear:

Anger is often used as a shield to overcome fear. Pregnancy comes with a range of concerns from fear of labor to birth defects, illnesses and parenting a child (1).

Does Anger Affect Your Unborn Child?

Author and pregnancy health care guru Dr. Miriam Stoppard, in her New Pregnancy and Birth Book, writes that a baby experiences not only external stimuli but also mother’s emotions which trigger the release of certain chemicals into the bloodstream. These chemicals travel across the placenta to the unborn baby within a few seconds of the mom feeling an emotion.

Long-term anger can cause detrimental effects in an unborn child, such as premature birth (delivery before 37 weeks), problematic birth, or low weight babies (2).

The studies also state that the stress created in the womb can affect the baby’s disposition. Children whose mothers underwent high stress, especially in their first trimester are known to manifest signs of irritability and depression. Also, severe anxiety in pregnancy can double the chances of bearing a hyperactive child.

If fear surrounds you, check with a mental healthcare professional who has experience in dealing with such issues in pregnant women. Also, talk to your obstetrician about ways to minimize fear and keep reminding yourself that majority of pregnancies resulted in healthy and happy babies.

How To Deal With Anger During Pregnancy?

According to the American Psychological Association (APA), there are some simple measures you can implement to control your anger, or keep it at bay (3).

1. Relaxation:

Simple relaxation techniques like deep breathing and relaxing imagery are very useful. They are also taught in childbirth education classes. You can try:

  • Deep breaths from your diaphragm. Monitor your breath that is coming from deep inside of your body and not just from your chest.
  • Keep reminding yourself to “keep calm” or “relax” when you take deep breaths.
  • Slow and non-strenuous yoga exercises relax your muscles, and you can feel calmer.
  • Meditate for at least ten minutes every morning to derive the best results. It also tunes your mental state.

2. Change the way you think:

When you are angry, you tend to speak something unnecessary. You could vent out your dormant frustrations that are totally unrelated to the situation. All this will vitiate your relationship with the other person. Therefore, be rational and tone down your voice.

[ Read: Emotional Changes During Pregnancy ]

3. Improve communication:

When in anger, we jump to inaccurate conclusions. It can only create a gap in relationships, which is uncalled for during pregnancy. You should always try to slow down and think before you say something.

4. Change the habit:

Try to analyze the situation that is making you angry and then discover ways to deal with it. If you cannot change the situation, at least change the way you react to that particular situation or a person.

5. Stop worrying:

This is one of the biggest causes of anger in pregnancy. The more you worry, the more you get agitated. It creates a significant impact on your emotional responses to those around you.

Put all your worries to rest, as these are all trivial concerns compared to the bounty of joy that is on its way to your life.

6. Daydream:

Call this romantic, but dreaming about your future baby and your role as a mother helps to uplift your mood. There is nothing wrong in daydreaming while you are pregnant.

Just imagine those loving visuals of spending time with your baby and bonding with your partner when you become parents. Visual imagination sows the seed of health and happiness in your subconscious, paving way to being a happy person.

7. Visit support forums:

If you are unable to manage your anger, do not get dejected. Attend support groups set up for pregnant mothers. Sharing your feelings with peers helps to support each other to overcome the sense of anxiety and helplessness. Group initiatives and activities help in anger management.

8. Plan your day:

Planning your day in advance not only sets a routine but also tunes your mind to the day as it progresses. Make a conscious effort to utter some positive statements such as “I will be happy throughout the day”, “I will not let the mood swings bring me down” etc. This approach works, provided you stick to your plan sincerely. Keeping yourself busy in your favorite activity  also makes your day better.

[ Read: Mood Swings During Pregnancy ]

9. Healthy lifestyle choices:

Make sure to follow a pregnancy diet. Take more of carbohydrates and proteins, recommended food options like green leafy veggies, nuts, and fortified whole grain bread. Keep having fresh fruits and salads in between your meals.

Also make sure you will have plenty of sleep, and stay away from smoking and alcohol.

Follow an exercise or pregnancy yoga regimes as it helps in managing anger. You will experience an emotional lift from the release of endorphins. Also, there will be an improvement in energy levels, which helps in mitigating conditions such as breathlessness, constipation, and backache.

Try these ways to overcome anger due to stress. If you find your anger hard to manage, you should consider talking to a therapist.

Feel free to share your experiences of anger in the comment section.


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Dr. Shashwat Jani

Dr. Shashwat Jani is a consultant obstetrician & gynecologist in Smt. N.H.L. Municipal Medical College, Ahmedabad. His field of interests are High Risk Pregnancy, Infertility and Endoscopy. He has written 12 chapters in reference books of Ob/Gyn and published 18 articles in Index journals. Dr. Jani has been invited as faculty in more than 200 national and international conferences. He... more

Rebecca Malachi

Rebecca is a pregnancy writer and editor with a passion for delivering research-based and engaging content in areas of fertility, pregnancy, birth, and post-pregnancy. She has been into health and wellness writing since 2010. She received her graduate degree in Biotechnology and Genetics from Loyola Academy, Osmania University and obtained a certification in ‘Nutrition and Lifestyle in Pregnancy’ from Ludwig... more