With my first pregnancy, I wasn’t quite sure what was happening. Was it for real? The tests turned positive, but did it bring the flabbergasting reaction as is portrayed in popular media or as what you figure out from the reaction of your friends or other moms-to-be? No. There was no such reaction. In fact, there was no reaction at all. Might sound hilarious, but that’s true. Maybe the fact that fertilization took place, but I could not see a fully-grown baby in my arms yet didn’t make it all any emotive. I kept wondering if all this was normal?
As I read about similar cases, it turned out many women don’t feel excited about their pregnancy especially in their first trimester. Here are some of the reasons why these moms-to-be experience so:
1. You Feel Ambivalent:
There is somewhat of a shock factor, even if the pregnancy is planned. You cannot fathom that you are growing a human inside you. It is so intangible at this stage. You also have secret fears of shouldering larger responsibilities as a mother and as to how you would be successful as a mother. There is self-doubt, and it builds up as self-guilt for not feeling excited about the pregnancy.
2. Your Reaction Contradicts The Popular Picture:
Before your pregnancy was confirmed you thought that you would be super-excited about it just like in movies or TV – of superfluous boundless joy, of fathers kissing pregnant bellies, and of festoons in the air. But nothing of this sort happens. You grew up dreaming that pregnancy was going to be the biggest high point in your life. But the reality is that most women just don’t feel good about it at least in the first trimester. As far as the old wive’s tale goes, pregnancy is all dreary in the first trimester.
3. Your Hormones Are All Over The Place:
You are tired most of the time. You could be nervous and have phases of anxiety. The first trimester is also the time when you are susceptible to a miscarriage, sometimes it occurs spontaneously for no good reason. So there is an inherent fear of what is going to happen. You keep brooding if you have passed that stage already. One day you might feel on top of the world, next day you feel depressed. It quite a play of your hormones that make you emotional and sensitive for no apparent reason.
4. The Prospect Of Losing Independence:
You no longer feel like a free bird. You are afraid you will lose the free time you used to have for yourself. Some women inadvertently go through a massive personality change after the birth of their babies. They are transformed into an entirely different human. They become sober, at times losing the vivaciousness they once had. If you have witnessed it all, you will wonder if the same is going to happen to you. You wonder if you still have the same bunch of friend, whether you will be able to hang out, party or go to movies. The reality is – nope. You won’t have the same amount of freedom and the time for yourself. But you will feel no remorse after seeing the beautiful face of your child who takes the front seat of everything in your life.
5. The Prospect Of Your Career:
There might be changes in your career by leaps and bounds. From being a highly career-oriented woman, you might suddenly be overcome with the motherly affections that prevent you from going to work anymore! In fact, you will not have the heart to leave your baby home under the care of someone once your maternity leaves lapse. Will you be able to juggle work and family? Would you be able to accomplish your career aspirations?
These and many more questions could hit you with pregnancy. But as the pregnancy progresses, so would find answers and solutions to most of your questions.
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