Expecting mothers often put in the time and effort to learn all there is to know about parenting. And this is quite natural considering that the anticipation and enthusiasm of having a baby runs high during this time. Mothers often envision what kind of parents they want to be – strict, friendly, chill, or cool! However, it’s not until your little one is in your arms that you realize the kind of parent you actually are. Parenting styles get formed from a mix of personal beliefs and habits of the parents as well as their interactions with other parents. But since the interactions of shy parents are very different from those of outgoing ones, even the challenges can vary. The relationship that you build with your child matters at the end of the day.
The playing field is quite different for both these kinds of parents. It’s interesting to see how shy parents feel about simple parenting activities that other parents carry out with ease and enthusiasm. If you don’t know what we’re talking about, scroll below to find out. We bring to you seven things that only shy moms can relate to:
1. Playdates? More Like Awkward Encounters
If you have always been a shy person, becoming a parent won’t magically turn you into an outgoing one who is fiercely protective of her child and is willing to be a cool mom among all cool moms. Whatever fear and anxieties you faced in the past, you will probably keep facing them. But while it was easier to avoid interactions before, after you become a parent at times you will have to go ahead and face such situations for your child’s sake.
As a mom, you probably meet other parents when you take your kids to the park, playschool, or even the pediatrician. It’s common practice to mingle and make friends during those encounters. Your kids also get a chance to develop their social skills, and playdates are perfect for that. While you are happy for your kid, you dread these playdates because they are just plain awkward for you.
2. “How Do I Make A Friend?”
Have you been struggling with all the new challenges that motherhood has brought with it? Making friends with a fellow mom might be just what you need. After all, who else can understand the woes of a new mom other than another? You can support each other through ups and downs and remind each other that you’re not alone in the journey of motherhood. But shy moms find it so hard to make new friends that they end up in a quiet corner. Though you really wish there was someone you could talk and share your woes with, the mere thought of opening yourself up to a new person scares the daylight out of you. Take baby steps and communicate in your own way. You don’t have to pretend to be an outgoing persona if it intimidates you.
3. Mom Groups Scare You
Several communities and groups connect to support and help each other. Most towns and cities will have support groups of moms who help each other out during pregnancy as well as post childbirth. While moms in these groups are not scary per se (except some), the group itself might scare you. There is no room for a timid person to talk in a group of ten mothers who are chatty, frustrated, or extremely friendly. Even if the groups are small, consisting of three or four people, it doesn’t make it any easier. The mere idea of expressing your inner feelings and emotions in front of others makes you want to stay away from any such groups.
4. Carpools Are Not As Fun As They Say
Carpooling lets people use a common vehicle, thus reducing energy wastage. This is so important in today’s deteriorating climate conditions. Carpooling is also an excellent way for moms to connect. But when you’re a shy mom, these car rides can be terrifying. You might stumble and be at a loss for words because you just don’t know how to converse. It’s not a bad attitude; it’s just a severe case of being shy!
5. Constant Fear Of Judgement
You’re probably lying if you say that you haven’t worried about other moms judging you. But when you’re a shy parent, the worry and fear are amplified multifold. Sometimes, you feel like you want to wear a banner across your body saying you’re shy, but that might get you too much attention and defeat the purpose. So, nevermind!
6. PTA Meetings Are Your Personal Hell
You might be able to avoid bumping into parents in other places, but at a PTA meeting, it’s nearly impossible. The horror is real! These meetings thrive on small talk, and you’re not cut out for it. You don’t know how to talk about the weather, a recipe you recently learned, or your child’s achievements, without it making you uncomfortable. You wish the teachers not only focussed on the child but also had some consideration for your personal comforts or discomforts. After all, it would have been totally possible for a one-on-one meeting instead of facing the whole crowd of parents.
7. You Wish You Weren’t As Shy As You Were
You constantly wish that you weren’t shy, and you wonder why you cannot just talk to people. When you watch other moms converse with ease, it leaves you feeling a little sad that you cannot. But you know well that you can’t change your entire personality just because you are now a parent. Remember that you are perfect as you are and you shouldn’t put unnecessary pressure on yourself to change. Do the best you can and over time things will sort themselves out.
If you could relate to all of the above, you’re probably as shy as they come. But dear moms, you don’t have to change and be outgoing to be a good mother. You’re still an awesome mother because you only want the best for your kid — that’s what matters! We appreciate you and love you for who you are, and you should too. You along with your partner and little one will get through this time and come up just fine. Was this article relatable to you? Comment below and tell us your most shy moments!