You both were inseparable. He used to talk to you for hours, miss you when you were away, often shower gifts on you, and had a great sex life too. But slowly things started changing as the dates and gifts became a thing of the past, the talks and laughs almost disappeared and the gaps became wider. Even before you realized, your husband has stopped loving you.
We enter the wedlock with the hope that our partner loves us forever. For many women that hope turns into reality but for some, it just gets lost somewhere in the journey. Though you try to deny the truth, the signs become too obvious to be ignored.
If you are not able to silence the voice in your head, then look for these signs. MomJunction tells you about the 21 obvious signs that he doesn’t love you anymore.
- He doesn’t open up anymore. The guy who couldn’t keep a simple thing from you is now hiding about his business trips, doesn’t tell you anything about his work or share his emotions.
Sometimes, your man could be holding things from you because he doesn’t want to trouble or hurt you or is hesitating to tell you for some reason. But, if you are sure there is no such genuine reason, and he is deliberately aloof and closed, then it could mean that he doesn’t want to share his life with you.
- He is fine not talking to you for days. He is away from home but doesn’t keep you updated or keep in touch with you. Or you both have a quarrel and stop talking for days but he doesn’t seem to be interested in reconciliation.
While it is not necessary for your husband to be the first one to talk, you will be able to sense the difference through their body language. In a regular quarrel, he may not talk but would desperately want to get back to you. This won’t be the case if he has fallen out of love with you.
- He needs lots of ‘me’ time: Wife and husband both need their private space in a marriage. It is completely alright for your guy to take off some time, refresh and return. But if he disappears and doesn’t bother to tell you where he is heading to or when he is coming back, it could be a sign of disinterest.
- He doesn’t comfort you when you are sad. It could be because of his distant behavior or him shutting you out. Instead of emotionally connecting with you, he chooses to ignore your pain and lets you be in it. Your problems, fears, and insecurities are ignored.
- The fights get ugly. Each couple has its style of arguing. Some show maturity, whereas some shout and scream. No matter how nasty the fight was, your partner never used to call you names, demean or insult you. But now he is doing all that to release the negative feelings and frustrations built up in him. Such suppressed emotions can tear the relationship apart.
- Your flaws start to annoy him. He starts complaining about the food you cook, feels that you talk a lot, dislikes the way you dress, and refuses to go out with you. He begins to snap at trivial things and wants to stay away from you.
Such behavior could happen if your man is going through some crisis such as losing a job or having some financial or health problems. But if there is no such explanation for his behavior, then it could mean that he doesn’t like you anymore.
- He is selfish. A couple cares for each other. The wife and husband consider each other’s interests, welfare, and approvals before doing something. However, your man hardly thinks about your welfare. He is selfish about his needs, his choices, and his enjoyment in life no matter how difficult it might be for you.
- Your sex life is at an all-time low. It is normal to have ups and downs in physical intimacy. But the problem arises when your husband is no longer interested in being physically intimate with you. In addition to being emotionally unavailable, he avoids physical intimacy even when you initiate it. However, if your husband is tired or is occupied with work, then do not misinterpret it as lack of interest.
- He stops paying attention to you. He doesn’t look into your eyes anymore, he doesn’t compliment you. He doesn’t notice any changes that you have brought about in your looks. He doesn’t have time for you, and when you try to grab his attention, he snaps, leaving you hurt and devastated.
- He is always away from home. Lately, your husband is spending more time away from home than with you. Every time it is an inevitable and unavoidable situation, and he has no option but to go. He always finds ways to avoid you and the family time.
- His future plans no longer include you. This is the biggest sign that your man has moved away from you. He always talks about moving out or taking up a job at a place far away from you. He doesn’t care how his actions would affect your life. You observe that he loves to lead a singleton life.
- He blames you for all the problems. Whenever you try to talk to him about these signs and seek an explanation for his behavior, he gets irritated, blames you for all his problems, and shuts you down. He may even say that his life was peaceful before he met you and now he doesn’t have any peace of mind.
- He forgets your wedding anniversary and birthday. Your husband has stopped wishing you on special occasions such as anniversaries. Also, on his birthday, your husband prefers to spend his day with his friends and doesn’t give you any time throughout the day.
- The only one working for the relationship is you. Relationships blossom when both the partners put in the effort. But if you are the only one to make efforts, then it is a sign that your man has stopped caring. It is always you who has to compromise and make sacrifices.
- He doesn’t miss you: When you are away from home, he doesn’t bother to call or message you to find out how you are. He doesn’t miss you and, worse, loves being alone at home. He doesn’t offer to drop you or pick you up from your place.
- He stops consulting you. A couple consults with each other before taking a decision. A man seeks his wife’s advice and vice versa. But your husband does not do that. He does not share his troubles or discuss his life with you.
- He stops being social with your friends and family. Another subtle sign to look out for is your man’s reluctance to meet your parents, family, and friends. He not only finds excuses to avoid them but also does not include you in his social circle. He doesn’t want to have anything in common with you.
It could be painful for you to accept that your husband doesn’t love you. But unless you observe the signs and know the reality, you cannot take things forward. Once you are sure of this, you may decide your course of action.
What To Do When Your Husband Doesn’t Love You Anymore?
Do not give up already and conclude that your marriage is over. Make one last attempt to revive your relationship. Try these steps:
1. Talk to him
What is worse than living with a man who doesn’t love you? Making wrong conclusions, and making decisions based on assumptions. So, to take an informed decision, talk to your husband. Keep your calm while talking and try to know what is really bothering him. Do not start the blame game, or shout at him. Give him an opportunity to tell you his side of the story.
2. Go for couples therapy
After talking, if your man opens up and is ready to give your relationship a second chance, then therapy can help you to get back the spark in your marriage. Do not go for therapy when the first step has failed, as you will again end up being the only one trying.
3. Take some time out
Do not fill your life with the thoughts of your husband and make it miserable. Take out some time for yourself, relax, travel alone, and spend time with friends or family. Never blame yourself for your husband’s behavior; it is not your fault that your man fell out of love with you.
4. Take a final call.
Sometimes no matter how much you try, you cannot bring back lost love. If things do not look good even after you have tried everything, then it is best to let go of your man. The longer you ignore the facts, the painful it will get for you. Living with a man who does not love you is worse than living alone. Take that step even though it may seem impossible to move on. Time heals everything.
It is normal to have a few of these signs occasionally because your husband cannot be his usual self always. External elements such as work pressure, issues in the extended family or financial problems also have an impact on how a wife and husband behave with each other. However, if the signs are there every day and everywhere, then it could mean that your man doesn’t love you. Do whatever you can to save the relationship but if it is still not working, it is good to move on in life.
Do you have any experience to share on these signs? Let us know in the comments section below.