22 Signs He Is Losing Interest In You And What To Do About It

Are you getting signs he is losing interest in you? It is common to feel this way. While you are in a relationship, there might be times when you feel as if your man’s interest is waning and is not into you anymore or is bored of the relationship. Such situations might leave you wondering about the status of your relationship and whether or not it is just your thoughts getting the better of you. Eventually, you may end up overanalyzing things and losing control over yourself. So, how to avoid this situation? Read on as we give you a list of indicators that might help you figure out whether or not your beau is losing interest in you.

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22 Signs He Is Losing Interest

1. He is not as responsive on the phone as he used to be

If you have been noticing that he is barely responding to your texts or not talking to you for long hours like he used to, it is a sign of worry. Moreover, if you feel that he isn’t enthusiastic about chatting with you but takes out time to call others, it may be an indication of his aloofness and that he doesn’t want to be around you all the time. However, remember that this may not always mean that he lost interest because this can happen naturally as a relationship is not as new.

2. He has started making excuses

He used to be there for you, taking time out from meetings and work. However, now he has started coming up with excuses about tight deadlines and urgent meetings at work whenever you ask him to spend time with you. Also, he avoids making plans or spending time with you, citing unjustifiable reasons. All these could indicate his waning interest.

3. He has stopped asking questions

When your partner asks you questions, it helps them understand and know you better—how things are at work and with friends and family or how you are dealing with a specific situation. When he stops asking questions and seems uninterested, it may show that he is not interested in checking on you and would like to keep to himself.

4. He acts rude and defensive

The man you fell in love with was sweet and friendly. He used to share all the little details with you. But now, he has become apathetic, cold, and rude. If you ask questions and want to know the details, he disregards them or gets annoyed and defensive. Moreover, he ends up making snide comments or offensive jokes to ward off your questions. These show that he has no interest in engaging with you.

He has become cold and rude

Image: Created with Dall·E

5. He picks fights

When you two are together, he complains about trivial things, tries to find faults in the smallest of issues, or makes you feel bad. Whether it is paying the bills, planning a meeting with the family, or just throwing out garbage,he makes things difficult for you by refusing to do it. He also initiates discussions or makes talks that generate tensions or disagreements.

6. He doesn’t notice anything about you

He used to notice every little change in you, whether it is a haircut, a new dress, or a new dish you tried your hand at. He used to do little things to make you feel special, like offering you comfort when you are in a bad mood or giving you his jacket when you feel a little nip in the air. However, now those small gestures of love have died down, replaced by an air of indifference or apathy. Try to find out if he’s just busy or there is something going on.

7. He has stopped making plans for dates

When you were dating, it was all about excitement and romantic outings and making plans for movies, dinner, or drinks. If he is canceling or procrastinating for another day without giving any justifiable reason, then you should get a hint that he may be waning away from you.

8. He has become vague

This behavior is an extension of the above sign. You may notice signs of detachment from your partner. He has been indecisive and vague for a while. Moreover, you may find it difficult to understand his intentions and plans. He may be making plans with his friends and families but not you, thus indicating he may be ignoring you or something more is going on.

9. He doesn’t discuss future plans

If he stops discussing his future with you or stops involving you in decisions related to his future or settling down, it could be a warning sign. He may even show disinclination to put a label on the relationship or make it official. You may notice that he makes statements that indicate he is looking for something serious or suggest that his friends or family are not sure about the relationship.

He stops discussing his future with you

Image: IStock

10. He makes no effort

If he has stopped bothering about his looks/personality, doesn’t care about his behavior, or has stopped making an effort to be romantic, he probably is losing interest. He becomes unenthusiastic and unconcerned, unlike the man you fell in love with. You may feel that he has stopped trying to impress you, making romantic gestures, and being curious about the things in your life.

protip_icon Expert says
Lisa Firestone, PhD in Psychology, California, says “ Honest communication can be tough, but it helps you to truly know your partner, rather than seeing him or her through a negative or critical lens (1).

11. There is no physical intimacy

When there is no physical intimacy between you two, and there is a declining interest in showing loving gestures from his side, he may be losing interest. You may notice the waning enthusiasm in initiating any intimate contact or attracting you.

12. There is only physical intimacy

You may be surprised at this sign as it is quite the opposite of other indications. If sex is the only thing that is happening between you two, without any emotional connection, he is only interested in satisfying his needs without undertaking the responsibilities of a committed relationship. He may see you less but insist on physical intimacy whenever you meet.

13. He doesn’t consider you a priority

When he no longer takes you into consideration, he may show signs of avoidance and it may indicate that you are not a priority. He will prioritize his time and plans instead of trying to adjust according to your needs. It shows that his interest in you is fading.

When he no longer takes you into consideration, it may indicate you are not a priority.

Image: IStock

14. He flirts with others

A little fun and subtle flirting can keep things exciting. However, if your man has made it a habit to get frisky or flirty with other women in front of you, it may mean that he no longer values you or your relationship. He might be doing it to make you mad intentionally, or it is his way of indicating that he has other plans for his love life.

15. He doesn’t support you

He is no longer interested in your dreams, aspirations, and needs, displaying a sense of remoteness. He doesn’t support you in your important decisions in both personal and professional life. Moreover, you may feel that you can no longer look up to him or trust him in planning your goals or celebrating your achievements.

16. The relationship has become stagnant

If he acts like a distant friend instead of a romantic partner, it could be a sign that the flame is fizzling out. You may feel that you have entered into a stagnant relationship, with boredom creeping in and him making no effort to keep things exciting. If he neglects you and is unresponsive, take a hint—he may no longer be interested in continuing the relationship.

He acts like a distant friend instead of a romantic partner

Image: IStock

protip_icon Quick tip
Reminding your partner about why you both committed to the relationship and the things he likes the most about you can help rekindle his love for you.

17. He doesn’t go the extra mile

If your partner does the bare minimum to keep things going between you two, it’s a red flag in your relationship. He doesn’t want to go the extra mile to make you feel special, spend time with you, or keep the relationship exciting. You may feel that the relationship has become one-sided.

18. He no longer expresses his love

He may not be interested in romance or call you affectionately like he used to. And his romantic gestures of bringing flowers or organizing a surprise candle-lit dinner for you are the things of the past. He no longer addresses you with the romantic nicknames that used to be the intimate thing between you two. These are all signs of a disinterested partner.

19. He has stopped making an effort towards your friends and family

Familial bonds and friendships are important in a couple’s life. If your bond with your man is strong, he will make an effort to spend time with your loved ones. However, if he avoids meeting them or makes snide comments about your loved ones, it may indicate that he doesn’t give importance to the relationships you value.

20. You have a gut feeling

Sometimes, you just have a strong gut feeling that you cannot ignore, no matter how much your friends and family try to convince you. You may have a hunch that you are falling out of love, and your partner may be trying to break off things with you.

A similar experience was shared by Tiffany, a part-time travel blogger who blogs about her life events on her online platform Think Gypsy. Writing about her recent breakup, Tiffany says, “I knew my relationship was over long before it came to a breakup. It was this feeling deep down in my gut; I just didn’t want to accept it. In fact, I pushed against it so hard that I think I may have actually made things worse.

“But then, one day, it hit me: I had completely lost myself in this relationship. I had nothing that was mine, no personality of my own. I had no confidence, no power, no life. I had given up everything that made me me in order to fit the relationship that my partner needed (i).”

You just have a strong gut feeling you cannot ignore

Image: IStock

21. He’s secretive

Being secretive can signify waning interest, often indicating a withdrawal from open and honest communication. When someone starts hiding aspects of their life or becomes less forthcoming, it can suggest a reduced desire to share and connect. This shift in behavior may reflect a distancing in the relationship, signaling a decrease in emotional investment and interest.

22. Lack of communication

Lack of communication can signal a loss of interest, often indicating a diminishing desire to engage and connect. When someone becomes less responsive or stops initiating conversations, it suggests a withdrawal from the relationship. This change in communication patterns can reflect a reduced emotional investment, showing that maintaining a connection is no longer a priority for them.

What To Do About It?

It is important to understand that, sometimes, communicating or expressing feelings is not as simple as it sounds. If you have a hunch, talk to your partner and understand what is going on with him. If he shares, you may work on it together as a team. His loss of interest may not even be related to your relationship. However, remember to prioritize your needs as well and do not be too harsh on yourself.

One of these things or a couple may not mean anything, but if many of them are there it may be time to have a conversation.

You may try the following tips.

  • Do not chase him: Do not make him realize that you are always available and dependent on him for your happiness. Instead of holding onto him, love yourself, and be yourself. Be the strong independent woman you used to be.
  • Do not keep on waiting for him: If he is unsure about the relationship, you do not need to get your life off the track. Do not make yourself miserable. Live your life with your friends and family.
  • Be honest about what you feel: You cannot stir feelings or force someone to commit to you. Be true to yourself and understand if your partner is ready for what you expect out of the relationship. Ask yourself if you want the relationship to progress naturally.
  • Work on yourself: In the course of the relationship, if you feel that you have lost yourself in taking care of your partner, give yourself time. Be the best version of yourself that you loved.

Frequently Asked Questions

1. Is he losing interest or just busy?

It is important to assess the situation before concluding that your man is losing interest in you. He may have a lot of other things going on in his life or he may be going through a crisis that he is not comfortable sharing with you. Communication is the key as you need to express your emotions and give him the opportunity and confidence to open up. However, trust your intuition while taking the time to judge all the aspects.

2. How do you attract a man who has lost interest?

Take care of yourself and reflect on what has changed over time. Avoid being clingy and give him space if you wish to attract him after apparently losing interest. Try to make him feel special and flirt with him once in a while. Tease him by uploading photos on social media or giving him a challenge. However, you may also step back and see how he responds.

3. Why do men suddenly lose interest?

A man losing interest in you does not make it your fault. His priorities may have changed, or he may have never been serious about you in the first place. However, excessive neediness, expectations, possessiveness, or an attempt to control his actions could make him lose interest.

4. How do you make a guy feel like he’s losing you?

Be your sincere self and hang out with your friends and socialize well. Avoid making continuous efforts to chase him and prioritize yourself. Make yourself busy and take time to reply to his texts or calls. This may make him understand that he is not your only option.

Feelings of uncertainty in a relationship can be scary, so it is best to spot any signs he is losing interest in you early on. If you notice more of these signs in his behavior, it may indicate the bitter truth you’ve been trying to avoid. If so, find out the underlying reasons for his disinterest in the relationship. If the feelings are mutual and you both respect the relationship, try to find solutions to your problems. However, if he is unwilling to put in the work, you must accept the truth. Understand that you deserve someone who loves you as you love them, and try to move on with your life.

Infographic: Reasons Behind Him Losing Interest In You

A relationship has several ups and downs, requiring both partners to fully invest in each other to ensure the relationship stays strong. But at times, things are difficult, and your partner might start losing interest in you and the relationship. But why? To answer that question, we have prepared this infographic on the possible reasons why he might lose interest in you. Give it a read, and do not forget to save it as well.

why is he losing interest (infographic)

Illustration: Momjunction Design Team

Get high-quality PDF version by clicking below.

Download Infographic in PDF version Download Infographic
Download Infographic in PDF version

Key Pointers

  • The feeling that your partner might be losing interest in you is common in relationships.
  • He might exhibit certain signs such as making frequent excuses for things, not making plans together or being rude.
  • There is no reason to lose hope as you can try out some tips that will help you get his interest in you back.

Are you worried he’s losing interest in you? Learn the 16 signs to watch out for in this video!

Personal Experience: Source


MomJunction's articles are written after analyzing the research works of expert authors and institutions. Our references consist of resources established by authorities in their respective fields. You can learn more about the authenticity of the information we present in our editorial policy.
  1. Why the Spark Fades in a Relationship.
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