6 Signs Your Wife Doesn’t Love You Anymore And What You Can Do

Image: ShutterStock

Everyone wants to be loved by their partner. However, at times, you feel your partner is ignoring you and doesn’t care for you. If you think your wife doesn’t love you anymore, don’t feel disheartened. Your wife may be going through a hard time or is genuinely busy with her work or other matters. Misunderstanding is one of the major reasons for bitterness in marriage. So, before drawing any conclusions, try to have an open and honest conversation with her. Tell her your concerns and how her behavior is taking a toll on you. In this post, we talk about some signs your spouse doesn’t love you the way she used to.

Signs Your Wife Doesn’t Love You Anymore

Let us have a look at some of the signs to watch out for.

1. Communication has become rare: You may notice that communication between the two of you is not the same as before. She may have stopped sharing the details of her day, including work, friends, and family with you, and her behavior towards you may imply detachment and coldness. She may have also stopped seeking advice from you or asking you to do certain things.
   Vada Karen, a blogger, points out the differences in communication styles between her and her husband. She says, “When I am upset about something, I want to talk about it. The more I talk, the better I feel. My husband, on the other hand, won’t talk. He just gets more involved in video games or the computer. It feels like he is shutting everything out, including me (i).” If this keeps happening, it can make the wife feel neglected and stop communicating.
   In another blog, mother and writer Jenn Wilson recalls the time when the relations between her and her husband were at breaking point. “One step I’ve taken to push us forward: I stopped saying, “I love you” (ii),” she expresses candidly.

Point to consider

The conversation with her is never easy and you feel drained after a few minutes of interaction.

2. There is a lack of intimacy: Intimacy is not just sexual. It includes emotional intimacy too. Hugging, cuddling, and holding hands are different ways to express love and share intimate moments. If your wife shows no interest or cringes when you initiate any physical contact and makes excuses to avoid moments of intimacy for no foreseeable reasons, you may need to figure out things.

Point to consider

Sometimes, women may feel exhausted juggling household and professional responsibilities. So be considerate, help her with household chores, and make her feel appreciated.

3. She is grumpy around you: You may notice that your wife’s attitude towards you has changed. Her mood may change as soon as you enter the room or initiate a talk. You also experience loneliness and feel empty and unloved even when she’s right before you. She may start minding habits which were irrelevant earlier, and the conversation with your wife may appear more like nagging.

Point to consider

Lack of healthy arguments and fights can also mean your wife has emotionally withdrawn from you and doesn’t care about the marriage.

Image: IStock

4. She keeps withdrawing from you: It is important to have some social life outside your marriage. However, if you feel that she enjoys the company of others more than yours, withdraws from you, or is not responsive to you, it could be a sign that she’s not into you anymore. You may also notice that she no longer texts or messages you to check about your day.

5. She pays little or no attention: As a couple, you know many things about each other, including your preferred looks, diet habits, etc. However, you notice that of late, she is paying little attention and is affectionless. If your wife doesn’t show any interest in these things anymore and disregards the changes you have made to your lifestyle, then your relationship could be on a downward trend.

6. There is someone else: This can be a tricky situation to handle. We meet various people every day, but some connections may be more than formal meetings. If there is someone else involved, she might not feel the same about you.

Image: IStock

7. There are no arguments: Healthy conflicts between partners help gain perspective and bring a couple closer. But if your wife has stopped arguing with you, it could hint at her disinterest in keeping up with the relationship. It could mean she does not want to waste her time fighting for a lost cause and is happy to agree.

What You Need to Do

The most important thing that you can do is to avoid making assumptions which could lead up to the stages of separation or even divorce. Let us discuss in detail how you can fix those red flags. You need to communicate sooner than later about any of the above issues. If you can’t do it yourself, then you need to get professional help to make this happen.

1. Communicate: Sometimes, it is very easy to assume the worst of things. If you feel any disconnect with your wife, make an effort to communicate with her. Honestly share your feelings and try to understand hers too. Be considerate and ask her if anything is bothering her and what you can do about it.

Image: IStock

2. Be mindful of your actions: A partner may feel that they are doing everything right and within the best of their abilities while the other isn’t contributing much. If you have neglected or ignored important things over months or years, make sure to acknowledge your mistakes.

3. Express your love: Make her feel loved and appreciated. Clear out any unwanted issues or insignificant reasons for which she may feel the lack of love from you. Acknowledge her loving presence by your gestures and words or shower her with the things she loves. Even small acts such as hugging her, holding her hands, helping her out with chores, complimenting her, surprising her, making her tea, or taking her out to her favorite places can work wonders in a relationship.

4. Be present: A relationship goes through many ups and downs, but being there for each other helps you navigate through those rough patches. Be present and stick around when you are needed to help her handle difficult situations. Even if you can’t be present physically, be emotionally available to her. 

Image: IStock

5. Do not try to change everything about her: An important aspect of any marriage or relationship is to love your partner in both the worst and best of times.  Accept their flaws too. Stop criticizing, nagging, or micromanaging things she does. Appreciate the bits your wife does to support you. 

6. Do not lose heart: It is easy to give up when a relationship goes through rough patches. You may encounter difficult situations now and then, which may lead to minor heartaches and make you feel heartbroken, but it doesn’t mean that the foundation of your marriage will get weaker. Do not give up on making positive changes in your marriage.

Image: IStock

7. Try couples therapy: Your wife and you both want to make it work but are unsure of how to do it. Perhaps a professional might help you with it. A reputable marriage therapist can recommend different ways to repair your strained relationship. In case your wife is unwilling to opt for couples therapy, you can seek help alone. A counselor can suggest ways to cope with the situation and save your marriage.
8. Move on: If you do not see any change in your wife in spite of all your efforts, it is time for you to move on. Understand that it is the time to call off the relationship and make a life of your own. This is the absolute last step and should be taken after a strong effort to resolve things. Contacting a professional to help with this is ideal. You will be more at peace if you put effort into repair rather than quickly running to the next relationship. You will also grow and learn in the process. This will help you in any relationship that you pursue.

Infographic: Ways To Handle Your Wife’s Fading Love For You

When one of the two spouses in a marriage starts to fall out of love, the relationship is bound to crumble. But often, it is not as apparent in the beginning. So if your wife seems distant from you lately, here are the hints that may indicate her fading love for you and a few helpful tips to deal with the situation.

Illustration: Momjunction Design Team

Image: Stable Diffusion/MomJunction Design Team

Are you feeling distant in your relationship? Check out this video for ten signs she doesn’t love you anymore. Get the answers you need to move forward.

Was this article helpful?

The following two tabs change content below.

• Reviewer
• Author
• Editor
• Fact-checker

Jessica JeffersonMA, MS, LMFT

Jessica Jefferson is a licensed marriage and family therapist and a certified perinatal mental health professional who is trained to help clients suffering from mental health disorders like anxiety and depression. She graduated with a Bachelors in Psychology from the University of Miami, a Masters in Psychology in Education from Teachers College, Columbia University and a Masters in Family Therapy...more

sanjana laguduBPharm, MBA

Sanjana did her graduation in Pharmacy from Andhra University and post graduation in management from GITAM Institute of Management. It was during her first job, she recognized her skills in writing and began working as a freelance writer. Later, she completely moved into content writing and has more than three years experience as a full-time content writer. Sanjana's articles in...more

Shikha ThakurMBA

Shikha is a writer-turned-editor at MomJunction, with over seven years of experience in the field of content. Having done a certification in Relationship Coaching, her core interest lies in writing articles that guide couples through their courtship to marriage and parenthood. She also specializes in baby names. A postgraduate in Human Resources from Jawaharlal Nehru Technological University, she likes understanding...more

N Pravenchandra SinghMA

Praven is an English literature expert. He did his bachelors in English from Delhi University and masters in English from Manipur University. Besides, he holds a certificate in multimedia design and content creation from NIELIT Imphal and presented papers at various national and international conferences. With nearly two years of experience, Praven writes on topics related to English literature and...more