What To Text After A First Date?

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Your first date went well. You and your partner had incredible chemistry, laughs, and stimulating conversation. However, you must send the appropriate text after the first date to get things moving.

One good date isn’t enough if you wish to continue the relationship. Dating is similar to a game, and you must be on your toes to succeed. Sending a good message after the first date may seem quite difficult. When to text, what to say, and how to ask for a second date may occupy your thoughts, causing you to overanalyze situations.

Conflicting thoughts might perplex you. You may have come across a few messaging guidelines. For example, some may advise you not to text for three days, while others may urge you to text right away. Sounds confusing, right?

Read this post to know when it’s appropriate to text after a first date and how to write a beautiful message for your special someone.

When To Text After A First Date?

When To Text After A First Date

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While texting immediately after leaving from the date might make you seem too eager, sending a message after three days might make your date think you are not interested, or worse, they might write you off and move on. Why wait long if your date went well?

A good rule of thumb is to wait a few hours before texting. It gives you some time to think about the date. Within the next few hours, send them a simple text to check if they reached home or tell them that you had fun. These simple messages show that you are polite and are interested in taking it forward. After the first text, give them time to respond and avoid bombarding them with messages.

What If They Text First?

There is a chance your date texts you first. In such a scenario, respond as soon as possible. Don’t wait for a day or two. You shouldn’t play hard to get and keep them hanging if you are interested. Taking too much time to respond might send the wrong message that you are not interested. 

Detailed Conversation And Planning A Subsequent Date

You can wait for another two or three days after the first text to start a long text conversation. It shows that you have a busy life. When you finally begin texting each other, express your interest in the second date. Since you have only been on one date, avoid over-the-top flirting, getting too personal, or expressing your love. It might come across as creepy.

What To Text After The First Date?

While knowing when to text is essential in the dating game, the text you send can make or break your case. If you are confused about what to text, here are a few examples that you can use.

1. “Hey, did you reach home safely?”

Hey, did you reach home safely, text after first date

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Texting your date whether they reached home safely shows you care about them. It is a great way to communicate your thoughtfulness. Sending the first text shows your interest and confidence, which might help you score some brownie points with your date. This text could help you gauge the person’s feelings about the date. If they didn’t enjoy the date, they might not text you back.

2. “Hey, I enjoyed your company tonight. I would love to see you again.”

That’s a clear and straightforward message showing you are interested in seeing them again. Their response will tell you whether they wish to pursue it further. If the person liked your company, the text would make them happy. Even if your date is not interested in going ahead, your message might persuade them to answer.

3. “Did I manage to charm you during the date, or should I try again?”

While you might have enjoyed the date, it is important to check if they had fun too. Instead of sending a generic message such as, “Hope you had fun tonight,” you can send a playful text. Your cheesy attempt at humor might make your date smile, and it could lead to a lively, light-hearted conversation.

4. “I am trying to focus on work, but I am distracted by the thoughts of your beautiful smile.”

Compliments are a great way to open a conversation after the first date. It will communicate your interest and make them feel good about themselves. Such healthy flirting draws attention and makes the conversation lively. You can keep the conversation going for hours and might score a second date sooner than you imagined. Remember to be respectful while flirting or giving a compliment.

5. “Hey, I watched the TV series you recommended. I have so much to discuss!”

Hey, I watched the TV series you recommended

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During a first date, you talk about your interests, likes, and dislikes. Use any such information to open a conversation with your date. It shows you are a good listener and are interested in the things they like. Since it is something they enjoy, your date would be enthusiastic about having a long discussion about it.

6. “Hello, fellow adventure junkie! There is an amazing trek a short distance from here. We should check it out.”

Exploring common interests is a great idea for a second date. If you both enjoy adventures, propose a one-day adventure trip. You both can do something you love and enjoy each other’s company. It gives you time to connect with each other.

7. “Thank you for suggesting lasagna. It’s the best thing I have had in a long time.”

Thank you for suggesting lasagna, text after first date

Image: iStock

Appreciating your date’s opinion is a great conversation starter after the first date. The text may lead to further exchange of views about food and will keep the conversation going. Your date will appreciate your effort and sincerity.

8. “I laugh every time I recall your first trip story. Our date was one of the most amazing evenings of my life.”

You want to connect again with your date as you had a great time. Let them know your feelings. Take them back to the date night and remind them of the beautiful time you shared. A text like this highlights the evening and builds the excitement to see each other. Your date would be pleased by your appreciation and might become open to more such outings.

Point to ponder
Don’t be too pushy while texting after the first date. You sure don’t want to come across as desperate! Also, avoid double texting.

9. “If there were a prize for the best date ever, do you think we would have a chance at winning it?”

A sweet and quirky text works well if you want to make your date smile. It shows your confidence and funny side. While it may seem a little over the top, it will lighten the mood. By sending this text, you can playfully communicate that you enjoyed the date and are interested in them. The unconventional approach would make you stand out from the others.

10. “I was nervous in the beginning, but the way we connected, I did not feel awkward. Your company made it all smooth!”

First dates can be awkward because you are trying to put your best foot forward. Instead of hiding how you felt, why not be open about it? Your honesty might ease their worries and help them relax. If they mistook your awkwardness as indifference or rudeness, your sincere text would clear such doubts. They might find your vulnerability endearing and be more comfortable with you.

11. “Hey, something exciting happened. I can’t wait to share it with you! Let’s catch up soon.”

If you want to make your date eager to meet you again, you need to create suspense. The exciting thing can be a promotion, a trip, a new idea you got, or even a unique incident you witnessed. Your date would be enthusiastic about uncovering the mystery and might agree to meet you soon, and you can enjoy your second date. But be sure to have something exciting to share before you send such a text.

12. “Hey, how is your day going? Did you do anything interesting today?”

If you want to check in with your date, you can send a short text asking about their day. It shows you are thinking about them and want to know them better. Share your funny or interesting experiences of the day and keep the conversation flowing by making them smile with your anecdotes.

13. “Just ordered a Thai curry for lunch. It made me miss the one we had on our date.”

If your first date went well, why not use it to remind them of those special moments? A message like this would take your date back to the memorable evening of your first date. They would remember the chemistry and the laughs you shared. Your text would show that you miss them and indicate that you are eager for a second date. You might end up having a long conversation reminiscing about the beautiful moments.

14. “Today is a hectic day, but I can’t help thinking about the amazing conversation we had on our first date.” 

The message shows you are missing them despite your busy schedule. Use it to figure out their interest in you. If your date does not respond or texts“Oh, that’s nice” or something along those lines, they might not be interested in a second date. On the other hand, if they respond saying they had fun, you can be optimistic about the next date.

15. “You seemed to enjoy the wine on our date. Have you tried the wine at XYZ? It’s the best in the city.” 

They would be glad you noticed their preferences

Image: iStock

If you want to go on a second date, you can try the sneaky approach. You need not ask the person directly but subtly let them know you would like to go out again. If your date liked you too, they would be glad you noticed their preferences and would be interested in a second date. They might directly or indirectly indicate to meet again.

16. “I know it would be difficult to top that amazing first date, but I would love to try. How does Saturday 7 pm sound?”

Taking the initiative to set up a second date without beating around the bush is appealing. Your direct approach and confidence will impress your date. It shows that you are willing to walk the extra mile. If your first date was terrific, play on that chemistry to snag the second date. Sending a charming message to uplift your date’s mood would make her accept your invite.

17. “Hey, I missed asking something important on our date. Umm, are you by any chance a Harry Potter fan?” 

To have a fun conversation after a date, pick up an exciting topic and spring it in the form of a question. You can then have a long stimulating conversation around the subject. For instance, if your date says, “Oh yeah, absolutely,” as a reply, you can go ahead and say, “Wow! I was checking if I met a perfect person on the date, and you proved me right.”

On the other hand, if the person says, “Not really.” You can text, “Oh damn. As a diehard Harry Potter fan, I might have to change your mind. Are you ready for a challenge?” Your quirky replies will keep the banter going.

18. “I found out where that stand-up comedian we loved is performing next. Let’s go!”

While on a date, you discuss several things. But there is one high point in every epic date. It might be something memorable that connected you two at a deeper level. If you two shared laughter while watching a comedian perform, a reference to that experience could serve as a strong reason for the second date.

19. “With the sizzling chemistry we shared, I have a feeling we are in for a long haul.”

You need to read your date’s chemistry and body language to understand if the person feels the same as you. If your connection was terrific, then such a bold text would impress your date. They would appreciate the straightforward attitude, and the relationship might move forward fast.

20. “Do you want to learn ice skating? I can teach you if you are free this Sunday. I promise I won’t let you fall.” 

People generally discuss their hobbies, interests, and skills on a date. Was your date particularly interested in picking up any of your skills? A talent that seemed to attract your date’s curiosity can be used to score a second date with them. Offer to help them learn the skill. It will allow you to show off your expertise, and you will get a chance to spend quality time and bond with your date.

21. “Hey, read this article. It perfectly explains what we were discussing about the history of that restaurant.” 

Did you guys spend considerable time discussing the history of the restaurant during your date? Share an article that mentions the restaurant’s history and have a meaningful conversation around it. It shows you made an effort to research a topic you discussed. Any discussion about a particular food item, culture, or history can be researched online and shared with your date to continue your conversation.

22. “Sorry if I seemed lost; I had a lot on my mind. Can we please try again?”

Sometimes, you cannot give your 100% due to personal issues or a bad day at work. It’s good to be upfront about it. Inform your date that the problem was at your end and you are interested in a do-over. Your request for a second chance will tell your date that you are still interested. A sincere apology might pave the way for a second date.

23. “Hey, did you enjoy the movie that you were so excited to watch?”

During the discussion, you sometimes discuss your plans for the week. It is possible your date was excited about watching a movie. You can send a follow-up text asking about their experience. Your date would appreciate you remembering something that mattered to them.

24. “I wanted to ask you what motivated you to take up psychology?”

Knowing what drives your date can help you develop a closer bond with them. It can be a passion or profession. They might have a good reason for choosing a particular field. If they spoke about taking up psychology during the date, compose a text asking why they chose the stream. Understand the motivation behind their choice. Your interest in their life might make them open up to you.

25. “I liked speaking to you, but we missed the spark. Good luck on your dating journey.”

It’s okay if your first date didn’t strike the way you expected. Instead of ghosting, be straightforward. Don’t be critical or harsh, share your opinion politely, and wish the person well. Send this message as soon as you can, and move on.

Frequently Asked Questions

1. Who should text first after a date?

“Man should text first after a date” is so passé. In today’s millennial world, anyone who feels connected with their date, enjoys their company, and wants to convey their feelings can text first. In these messages, you can discuss how you felt, if you’re looking forward to seeing them again, or even if you wish to say a polite no, text and open up.

2. How often should you text after a first date?

Spamming can turn off your date, but there is no rule of thumb on the number of times you can text. You can just text a couple of times to learn about their interests, or if you both enjoyed meeting each other, you could chat like there’s no tomorrow.

Now that you know what to text after the first date, we hope the above tips will help you take the right steps towards the success of this relationship. Just remember, be yourself and take it slow. The above texts are for your reference. You may customize them based on how well the date went and the chemistry you shared with them. Convey your feelings subtly, and if you think they feel the same way, indicate your interest in a second date. Although texting them may seem scary, remember that your future comfort level with them depends on how you face this awkwardness today. So just go with the flow and let the conversation progress.

Key Pointers

  • If your date texts you first, respond as soon as possible. Taking too long to respond may be perceived as a lack of interest.
  • Let them know your feelings and ask open-ended questions to continue the conversation and connect with them.
  • You may go with the flow and do not overthink while texting after the first date.

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