20 Things That Would Happen If Men Got Pregnant

Things That Would Happen If Men Got Pregnant

Image: iStock

A couple of years ago a Chicago teen pregnancy campaign featured some posters of boys showing off their ‘pregnant’ bellies. The posters were put up near high schools to highlight the impact of unprotected sex and the significance of shared responsibility. The campaign revolved around reducing teen pregnancy rates as well. Earlier a similar campaign in Milwaukee had been successful in bringing down the teen pregnancy rates.

This was an advertising campaign. But, what if boys could become pregnant? Is it possible to defy nature? Can a man’s body bear a child? A definite no is the answer. Although hypothetically, a man can implant and incubate an embryo in his body so long as a placenta is attached to his bowel (the implantation will occur here through an ectopic or external pregnancy) only to deliver the child through Caesarean, it will not be possible to separate the placenta from man’s abdomen and therefore can pose a high risk to his life. So, in short – No! Man cannot defy nature in terms of childbearing. But by any chance if there were going to be medical miracles, this is what would be expected of pregnant men:

1. They Will Look Like Snobs Showcasing Their Evergrowing Belly:

Look Like Snobs Showcasing Their Evergrowing Belly

Image credit: giphy.com

And no, people would not dare to touch his belly. People would receive him on a red carpet, offer him a throne, order him the finest drink, book him a limousine and make sure the star gets home sober.

2. Paternal Leave Would Be Longer…EHM…(did we hear infinitely long?)


Image credit: giphy.com

And your employment will still be safe.

3. News Of Childbirth Would Be Celebrated Like An Aggressive Victory:

Aggressive Victory

Image credit: giphy.com

Man, we just thought even a Manchester United victory never witnessed such reception!

4. He Will Be Racking His Nerves On Nearing The Due Date:

Nearing The Due Date

Image credit: giphy.com

As if women don’t get nervous! But men might just want to jump off from a rooftop before labor kicks in!

5. He Will Be Annoyed On Being Asked If Childbirth Was The Equivalent Of Getting Kicked In The Balls.

Getting Kicked In The Balls

Image credit: giphy.com

Boy, who could tell that!

6. The Gags Will Be As Smooth As Licking:

The Gags Will Be As Smooth As Licking

Image credit: giphy.com

So he will not have to scurry around for the nearest washroom. He will take it in his stride like it’s an entitlement.

7. A Pregnancy Confirmation Will Come As An Ego Booster:

Ego Booster

Image credit: giphy.com

Sure, he will be a swell at his ability to get impregnated!

8. But In Private This Is What He Will Say:

What He Will Say

Image credit: giphy.com

FYI, pregnancy needs guts.

9. He Can Get Away With Annoying His Partner:

His Partner

Image credit: giphy.com

She will be helpless at him beating around the bush.

10. He Will Be A Bit Vain At Combating Aromas Of Foods:

Aromas Of Foods

Image credit: giphy.com

A little unlike women who can see it through with more refinement ;)

11. This Is How He Will Take His Baby Kicking Inside Him:

Baby Kicking Inside Him

Image credit: giphy.com

It looks like a cool juggler’s act when it happens inside us women, eh?

12. He Will Be Hailed ‘Cool’ Under All Circumstances:

Hailed Cool

Image credit: giphy.com

Any why not! He will be celebrated before, during and after the bump anyhow.

13. He Will Be Free To Express His Disapprovals Just About Anytime, Anywhere:

Free To Express

Image credit: giphy.com

There will be no questions on his mood swings.

14. He May Not Be Listening And Will Direct You To Repeat Like You Said Nothing…

May Not Be Listening

Image credit: giphy.com

And women will be expected to come the full circle again!

15. If You Happen To Skip Cooking A Meal, This Is What He Will Say:

Skip Cooking A Meal

Image credit: giphy.com

The quiet authoritativeness, for sure!

16. He Will Have No Inhibitions About He Feels:


Image credit: giphy.com

And his partner will be obligated to nod, rather than resist the change.

17. He will get away with a beer belly:

get away with a beer belly

Image credit: giphy.com

Yes, it will be hard to differentiate it from pregnancy and they could get away with that for months!

18. They Will Have More Reasons To Be Sedentary:

Reasons To Be Sedentary

Image credit: giphy.com

19. And This Is How They Would Condole:

How They Would Condole

Image credit: giphy.com

20. “I Don’t Like To Have Twins”….

I Don’t Like To Have Twins

Image credit: giphy.com

And they will never be ready for another pregnancy!

Sure, if nature could allow, women might want swap their pregnancies with their partners for a one-off!

The following two tabs change content below.
Featured Image