10 Tips To Increase Self Confidence In Teenagers

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Adolescence brings several physical, physiological, emotional, and social changes in teens. Sometimes, these changes can be quite overwhelming and confusing, which is when parents should work on building confidence in teenagers.

Developing self-confidence is necessary to help teenagers achieve their goals, build better relationships, and become resilient to face challenges. Parents play a significant role in defining their children’s personalities. Their actions and words guide children toward the right path. Therefore, you should always be supportive toward your teenagers, show them respect, appreciate them, and encourage them to be optimistic.

Read this post to learn more about the importance of developing self-confidence in children and how you can help them achieve it.

What Is Self-Confidence?

Building self-confidence in teenager

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The confidence in oneself to acknowledge and trust one’s abilities and skills and have a sense of control in life is self-confidence (1). When a person is confident:

  • It affects the way one acts in public.
  • It reflects in the way one conducts themselves.
  • It strengthens their overall personality
  • It raises one’s happiness quotient

Why Is Self-Confidence Necessary In Teenagers?

Imperative to buid confidence in teenagers

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Self confidence gives a teenager the ability to face life, its challenges, uncertainty and even tackle disappointments, ups, and downs of life better (2).

  • Self-confidence helps a teenager go out and achieve their aims and goals in life.
  • It helps them build better bonds and relations with peers, friends, and family, making them happy and mentally strong.
  • It helps them make safe and well-thought decisions and avoid people and situations that may harm them in any way.

Besides these, such teens are more likely to be assertive, positive, and enthusiastic.

Parents’ Role In Increasing Teenagers’ Self Confidence

Parents' role is vital for building confidence in teenagers

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Of all people, parents are the most important when it comes to building self-confidence in teenagers. Your support in building confidence in teens can go a long way in molding their personality.

  • Your actions and words impact your teenager the most.
  • How you feel about them and how you make them feel about themselves directly affects their level of self confidence.
  • The way you treat them also sets a benchmark about how others should treat your teenager.

10 Tips On How To Increase Self Confidence In Teenagers

Teenage is when a child is molded into an adult. It is such a sensitive process that only the parents have the tools (such as patience and courage). So, here are some of the effective tips on increasing your teenager’s self-confidence (2) (3).

1. Show respect

Do not forget – your teenager is not a child anymore and is a near-adult, and as such, deserves respect just like any other adult.

  • When you address your teenager, always show respect. Do not let disdain or contempt show in your tone!
  • Always treat their problems and fears with importance. Never shun off your teenager’s fears as a childhood worry.

2. Praise often

You must praise your teenager often. Be generous with your compliments.

  • When you praise your teenager for something good they did, it boosts their confidence in leaps and bounds. It encourages them to do even better next time.
  • Always express yourself and let them know how good and proud you feel to have them as your kid.

3. Avoid criticism

Try and avoid criticizing as much as you can. Criticism can be detrimental to your teenager’s self-confidence.

  • If you disapprove or dislike something that involves your teen, take time to sit with them and talk it out.
  • Teenagers often take criticism as ridicule or shame. But, at times, when criticism is unavoidable, watch your tone.

4. Encourage extra-curricular activities

Extra-curricular activities help build confidence in teenagers

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Let your teenager follow his hobbies.

  • Encourage them to participate in more and more activities. It is important for your teenager to excel at anything they like and enjoy.
  • Extracurricular activities prove to be great opportunities for learning about success, failure, challenges and they add a great deal to your teenager’s confidence.
  • These activities build a positive team spirit in your teenager and help them learn about working together towards a common goal.

5. Support optimistic friendships

We know you cannot possibly control, pick and choose the kind of friends your teenager will make. Teach them respect and acceptance.

  • Mutual understanding and respect in any relationship are important. Teach your teen that value is what matters between friends.
  • The kind of friends your teenager makes also affects their self-confidence. Teach them ways to differentiate between good and fair-weather friends.

6. Teach them that looks do not matter

Most teenagers fall under peer pressure. To them, looks matter a lot. They crave to look like models and celebs, and the inability to do so affects their self-confidence immensely.

  • It is important to sit and explain to your teenager that looks do not matter.
  • What matters is good manners, hygiene, healthy mind and body.

7. Focus on their strengths

Tell your teenager that they should focus more on strengths. Never compare your teenager to their peers, friends, siblings, and cousins.

  • Your teen should realize how different people have different strengths. Comparison creates rivalry.
  • Make your teenager understand that their only competition is with themselves. And the best way to do even better is to focus on strengths.

8. Teach them to be stronger

Teach your teenager to build some tolerance level towards teasing or heckling. Teasing affects every teenager’s self confidence.

  • A good rule in life is to grin and bear it. Your teenager must learn to tolerate negative emotions to some extent, without losing their cool
  • Your teenager must know that teasing cannot hurt, and it should in no way affect their self-confidence.

9. Look for professional help

Counseling for building confidence in teenagers

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If your teenager suffers from a severe lack of confidence that has started to affect their academic and/or social life, you may need help from external sources.

  • Initially, you can try family counseling with your teen’s favorite relatives.
  • If the above does not work, it is best to seek professional help, which could help uncover the real issue behind this lacking and help your teenager come out of it.

10. Be your teenager’s support system

You probably don’t even realize how small gestures and the little things you say and do in regular life boost your teenager’s self-confidence. Your teenager must know that you are always there for them, no matter what.

  • Your support can act as a catalyst as far as your teenager’s self confidence is concerned.
  • The moment your teenager knows they have someone to rely on, to fall back upon, they can face their life with even more confidence and strength.

Frequently Asked Questions

1. What causes a lack of confidence?

An unhappy childhood and poor academic performance can affect children’s confidence. Extreme criticism from teachers and parents and ongoing stress from life events can also impact self-confidence (4).

2. What are some qualities of those with high self-esteem?

People with high self-esteem feel worthy, respected, valued, and accepted by others. A person with high self-esteem can accept their mistakes and still believe in themself even if they don’t succeed at first (5).

3. Is low self-confidence a mental health issue?

Low self-confidence or low self-esteem alone is not a mental health problem. However, it can be closely related to various mental health issues, including long-term mental health issues such as anxiety and depression, which can negatively affect a person’s self-esteem (6).

4. What causes low self-esteem in a child?

Childhood trauma such as emotional, physical, or sexual abuse, severe illness, disasters, and grief can cause low self-esteem in children. These unpleasant experiences make the child perceive that nothing around them is good (7).

5. What destroys a child’s confidence?

Poor parental strategies can destroy a child’s confidence in themselves. Letting them escape responsibility, being overprotective, preventing them from making mistakes, protecting them from emotions, and condoning a victim mentality could negatively affect your child’s self-confidence. Expecting perfection and punishing rather than disciplining them for their mistakes can also destroy a child’s self-confidence (8).

The several physical, psychological, emotional, and hormonal changes of adolescence may take a toll on the self-confidence in teenagers. Self-confidence is an essential quality for teenagers as it helps them achieve success in their academics and helps them make friends and have a vibrant social life. Parents play a major role in building confidence in teenagers. Appreciating them, avoiding destructive criticism, teaching them the importance of inner beauty, focusing on their strengths, and providing professional help when needed are some of the many ways parents can help increase confidence in their teenagers.


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Mitha Shameer

Mitha is passionate about writing on topics related to women and children. She loves to present the brighter side of life to her readers in the form of her articles. She writes on games, stories, arts & craft, celebrations and more for MomJunction. When she isn't glued to online shopping websites, she loves reading books and watching F.R.I.E.N.D.S.