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You and your husband were happily living together. But lately, he seems alienated, and there’s a weird silence between you two. It hurts, but what makes it unbearable is the presence of another woman. So what makes a man leave his wife for another woman?
Getting an answer to this question before confronting your husband is essential to understand what went wrong in your marriage. Knowing the answers can save you from unnecessary guilt, help correct your mistakes, and restore your lost attraction, trust, and love. Keep reading if you wish to move on if your husband has fallen out of love with you.
What Makes A Man Leave His Wife For Another Woman?
Here are a few common reasons that may help you understand why your husband is moving away from you.
1. He feels he doesn’t offer enough value
Some men feel they have to offer significant value to the marriage and the family. It may not be necessarily associated with financial aspects. He feels a sense of disregard and disrespect as his presence is not needed, or nobody would miss him if he disappeared. When he feels insignificant to the family and assumes he isn’t contributing to the relationship, he may drift towards a woman who makes him feel most valued.
If you are an independent woman, your husband might probably feel he has nothing to offer you in life. That feeling could be a reason for him moving away.
2. He senses an emotional disconnect
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Men and women need to feel they have a meaningful connection beyond the physical bond. If he senses an emotional distance, the rift between you both could widen with no scope of bridging again.
Sometimes, it could happen due to a change in a man’s emotional needs due to a recent event (illness, death of someone close, or loss of job). If you fail to identify the reason, you may not be able to offer emotional support to your man, leaving him feeling dissatisfied in the marriage.
3. He fears losing control
Most men understand and admire strong, driven, independent women. However, if the balance shifts too much to one and the independence transforms into dominance and control, it can give rise to conflicts and unhappiness. If a man fears losing control in the marriage due to his wife’s dominant role, he could choose to leave and be with a woman who gives him full control.
4. He has different physical needs
Sex is one of the most common reasons for divorce. When the man has different physical needs from the woman, it gives rise to sexual incompatibility. The way you approach sex life matters in a relationship. If you both are unable to connect and meet each other’s desires, the very act of sex may become unfulfilling. When he finds someone who shares a similar level of physical intimacy, the temptation may arise, giving way to betrayal and adultery.
An anonymous blogger who was previously married reveals that she broke up with her husband due to her husband’s infidelity. She says, “Yes, my husband cheated on me with an ungodly amount of women (i).”
5. His feelings for you have changed
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As you age, you go through life experiences that subtly shape your attitude and personality. It is possible that after a few years of marriage, he finds you different. He could then look for a woman who matches the image he has for the love of his life.
6. He balks at the relationship’s progression
If you have been talking about children or buying a home, and your man seems to avoid the discussion, he could be feeling intimidated by how fast things are moving. He could feel pressured being with you and might look for another woman who wants to take things slower.
7. He feels disrespected
A man who is often put down by his wife may develop a feeling of neglect, disregard, and disrespect. In case you express your disapproval or contempt for his friends or his work, he may feel low. You may not deliberately be disrespecting your spouse, but your actions or words may make him feel so. In such a scenario, he would prefer to quit the marriage and move towards another woman who gives him the respect he craves.
8. He is bored of the marriage
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When you were newly married, you were excited and thrilled to explore each other. As the years go by, you tend to fall into a rut. The marriage could become boring and dull as you both are busy in your life. If your husband feels that the spark is lost and finds someone else attractive, he may move on.
Did you know?9. He is unable to be himself
It’s difficult to survive a relationship where you have to watch your behavior or speech constantly. Men who feel stifled in marriage may get quieter and avoid face-to-face conversations. The feeling is debilitating and can no longer make the relationship healthy. If he can find freedom elsewhere, he might consider moving away from you.
10. He has fallen in love
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Your husband can fall in love again with a woman who is more compatible than you are. As you grow in life and meet new people, you may come across people who seem to connect better. If your husband feels he is happier with her, he could leave you for her.
11. He is unable to shake off the ill feeling
A past issue could pop up later in life, urging the man to leave you and go to a woman who empathizes with him. A festering resentment could blow up into bigger proportions when not taken care of in time. He may then leave you for someone who commiserates with him.
12. He has grown apart
Sometimes two individuals grow apart. You no longer have anything in common and don’t enjoy doing things together. Both of you are caught up in your own lives and tend to move ahead without the other. If you have grown apart, he may turn to another woman for empathy and compatibility. However, if you have faith in yourself, try to reignite the lost passion, desire, and longing.
If you have faith in yourself and know you can save your relationship, you could try repairing the connection and restoring what you had with your partner.
How To Repair Your Relationship?
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Assessing where you went wrong and where your relationship faltered can help you repair your relationship with him. Often, a relationship that seems mangled beyond hope can be brought to life by:
1. Communicating
Talk to him calmly and ask him what he misses in the marriage. Ask him if he is willing to put in the effort to restore the bond and promise him that you will play a balancing role. Have an open discussion on what went wrong and come up with solutions instead of misunderstanding and blaming each other. Be honest, open, and kind to each other when you communicate.
2. Acknowledging
Acknowledgment is one step to bridge gaps in a marriage. Acknowledging his contribution and appreciating him for what he does can make him feel he is a valued part of your life and your family.
3. Spicing things up
Why let your life stay in its boring rut? Spice things up, be it in the bedroom or outside. Plan parties, surprises, and vacations, and take steps to improve your sex life by knowing your partner’s preferences. Find something common you both would like to try.
4. Caring
Show your husband that you care by empathizing with him and giving him emotional support. Often, gaps appear in a marriage when the man cannot see his wife caring about his well-being and happiness. Small gestures such as calling to check if he had lunch, making a special dinner, or leaving notes for him wishing good luck before a meeting will go a long way in mending the relationship. Show you are thinking of him and want him to be happy, healthy, and successful.
How Do You Know If He Is Going To Leave You For Another Woman?
While there are no clear signs to predict if a guy will leave you, certain behaviors can point to trouble in your relationship. So watch out for signs such as your partner acting distant, spending less time with you, or treating you more like a roommate. When a person prioritizes someone else over you, they may act distant. Moreover, be cautious if he doesn’t make an effort to strengthen your relationship and humiliate you in public. A dejected partner may avoid open communication and may not try to resolve conflicts. It can also be a warning sign if he doesn’t contribute financially and makes you pay most of the bills. He may also exclude you from his plans and ignore your existence. Recognizing these signs helps you make informed choices about your relationship.
How To Deal When He Leaves You For Another Woman?
Dealing with the fact that the man you once loved doesn’t want you in his life can be traumatic. Here are a few ways to help you deal with the feeling appropriately to emerge stronger and better.
1. Don’t be behind him for answers
If he ignores you constantly, repeatedly asking him for answers may make things tough for you. He may try to cover up guilt or vent his frustration by blaming you squarely for the unhappy marriage. That could end up making you question yourself or making you feel that you are miserable. While it is okay to want to know why he left you, keep in mind that your mental health and emotional stability are a priority over his selfishness.
2. Don’t let the separation rule your life
You have more in your life than your broken marriage or relationship. Avoid dwelling on it to the exclusion of everything else. It is time to categorize your priorities in life and think about them. Meanwhile, start something new that gives you a sense of self-worth to empower you. Pamper yourself and boost your self-confidence.
Point to consider3. Don’t compete
Do not compare and compete with the ‘other woman‘ for your partner. Remember that he left you of his own volition. Competing for his attention could make you the ‘villain,’ and you would lose your identity eventually. So get over the competition obsession and keep reminding yourselves that his infidelity isn’t worth your mental peace, happiness, and self-esteem.
4. Accept that it is over
Sometimes, the marriage is over, and there is nothing to do about it. Accept the fact and focus on your life. Staying stuck in the past and letting jealousy and unforgiveness rule over is unhealthy. Remember, it is not the end of the world; maybe the best is yet to come.
According to Susan, a youtuber and divorcee, it is okay to feel scared of change, but one must also understand that behind every dark cloud, there is a silver lining. She says, “That change isn’t as scary as sometimes we make it. It’s not a negative thing. It reminds me of that quote, “It was the best of times and it was the worst of times (ii).”
Frequently Asked Questions
1. How do you know if your husband is in love with another woman?
If a husband is in love with another woman, there are many signs that they may exhibit. They may suddenly become cautious about their appearance. Their outings may become longer, and they seem to lie about their whereabouts. Another sign of cheating could be increased affection. Gaslighting and accusing you of cheating them in return are a few tell-tale signs of a husband who could be cheating. All these signs could also indicate otherwise. Hence, confirm the affair before taking any further steps.
2. Can a husband come back after leaving you for someone else?
A husband can return to their partner after falling in love with someone else. However, there could be a miscommunication between the couple after this affair. The trust between the couple could be severed, which might affect their compatibility. It might also be traumatic for the one who has been created. A successful relationship could be possible in such cases, provided the partners work on the issues.
3. Is it possible for a man to have a successful relationship with another woman after leaving his wife?
The success of a relationship depends on various factors such as love, compatibility, trust, and communication. If a man’s expectations are not met in the first relationship but are fulfilled by someone he meets after, he may have a successful relationship with the latter, provided they also connect on an emotional level and share mutual feelings of love.
4. What are the long-term effects of a man leaving his wife for another woman?
Long-term effects can be emotional and financial. Being rejected by a man for another woman can cause damage to a woman’s self-esteem and mental health. She can also develop trust issues and find it difficult to get into another relationship. If they have children together and she is financially dependent on her spouse, it may take some time for her to become financially stable.
Marriages may change over time: some may grow stronger, while others may grow weaker. If the husband wants to end the relationship because he has found another woman, you may wonder what makes a man leave his wife for another woman. It could be because of a loss of emotional connection, different physical needs, or boredom in the relationship. If you sense your marriage is falling apart, talk to your husband about his behavior, show more care, and spice up your relationship. Your efforts may help restore a healthy relationship. However, if your husband has decided to leave you, it is better to accept the situation. The experience might be traumatic, but moving forward will help safeguard your mental and emotional health.
Infographic: Ways To Respond If Your Man Has Left You For Another Woman
Going through heartbreak can be a difficult experience if your partner has left you for another woman. However, to get through this challenging time, respond in a healthy way that can ultimately help you find happiness. So, check out the infographic below to learn about possible ways to respond to this situation.
Illustration: Momjunction Design Team
Key Pointers
- Feeling emotionally distant or losing control over the relationship may push a man to leave his wife for another woman.
- Some men may even have unsatisfied physical needs and feel bored of their wives.
- Besides other reasons, he must have fallen in love with another woman, but there may still be hope for redemption in your relationship.
Image: Stable Diffusion/MomJunction Design Team
There are various reasons why a man may leave his wife for another woman. This video explores those reasons and also explains what it means for the women involved with such men.
Personal Experience: Sources
MomJunction articles include first-hand experiences to provide you with better insights through real-life narratives. Here are the sources of personal accounts referenced in this article.
i. Plot twist… cheating wasn’t the only reason my marriage failed;https://thelifeofannagilliland.wordpress.com/2016/11/14/plot-twist-cheating-wasnt-the-only-reason-my-marriage-failed/
ii. When my husband left me – How I started over at 60;
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lRi5AK8ilR8
