When You Feel Attracted To Someone, Do They Feel It Too? 15 Signs

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When you feel attracted to someone, do they feel it too? This question might linger on your mind when you are interested in someone. Whenever they are around, your cheeks get flushed, butterflies flutter in your stomach, and your knees go weak. Somewhere deep inside, you want to know whether or not they also feel drawn to you.

In other cases, if you are casually dating or hanging around, it is common to find that urge to know if they are smitten by you. The best way to do this is to observe them with sincerity and look for signs indicating they are fascinated by you. In this post, we will tell you about a few ways by which you can tell whether or not they are attracted to you.

What Are The Factors That Influence Attractions?

Several biological, social, and environmental factors can play a crucial part in influencing attraction.

1. Physical attractiveness: The appearance of a person is a major factor that influences attractiveness, especially if you’re meeting someone for the first time. Appearance may include facial features, body shape, height, and clothing.
2. Similarity: If the person shares similar preferences, food habits, and behavior to yours, the attractiveness quotient increases.
3. Proximity: If you meet someone often, i.e., if they live in the same neighborhood or attend the same school/college, the chances of interactions also increase. It can lead to increased attractiveness towards the person.
4. Familiarity: Even if you have mutual friends, the idea of familiarity between you two can make one feel comfortable and breed increased attractiveness.
5. Personality and communication skills: People are more likely to get attracted to those with good communication skills and a sense of humor as they make them feel good about themselves.
6. Social and cultural factors: If family and religious values are shared, it can influence your attraction towards that person. However, this might not hold true for everyone.

When You Feel Attracted To Someone, Do They Feel It Too?

Here are some signs to know they are attracted to you the same way you are.

1. Curiosity

Do they keep asking questions to you or your friends about you? They seem to want to know more about you and pay attention to the smallest details about you. You may find them asking random questions about your life. Most of all, they want to know if you are seeing someone else. This curiosity could be a vital sign that they are indeed allured by you.

Be Watchful

It’s natural to be curious about someone you like, and it’s okay to ask questions and get to know each other. However, if they start becoming overly intrusive early in your relationship, it may be a red flag that they are not respecting your boundaries.

2. Reciprocity

They reply to your messages, emails, and calls without taking much time. If you guys often communicate, see if they reciprocate your actions and energy. Also, observe if they are as interested in talking or meeting you as you are. To know about it, plan a date and see if they are excited. Their level of excitement will tell you how much you have charmed them.

3. Body language

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Have you ever been lured by someone’s charm, only to wonder if they reciprocate your feelings? You don’t need to be an expert to understand the basic body language of someone. Simple acts such as being nervous around you, stumbling on words, or fidgeting are signs of anxiousness. These signs could mean they are cautious about making a good impression. Uncrossed arms, open shoulders, holding a gaze, fixing the hair or shirt, and licking one’s lips are all signs that they accept your presence and want to impress you. Blushing is a good indication that they are captivated by you. Also, it is natural for someone to be awkward around someone they like. So talking very fast or being clumsy might also indicate that they are enamored with you.

4. Smile

As simple as it may sound, if the person you like has a spontaneous smile around you or can’t stop smiling when talking to you, they are most likely interested in you. A smile is a sign of happiness, comfort, and attraction in the face of someone truly enchanted by you. It sends out positive vibes between you two.

5. Mirroring behavior

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A person interested in you will unconsciously mimic some of your behavior and actions, such as holding the glass, ordering the same coffee, or even moving their hands like you do. Often, they start using the phrases you usually use. These are signs that the person is infatuated with you and is aligning with you to create a bond. They are trying to get your attention. It could also mean they find your behavior cute and is enraptured by you.

Did you know?

Research shows that behavioral mimicry serves as an implicit self-regulatory function in relationship maintenance, as it can help establish rapport, build trust, and strengthen social bonds (1).

6. Communication

If your love interest has beguiled you through frequent conversations over the smallest of things, they could be interested in you. Texting you throughout the day, asking you about your work, seeking your advice on something, and pulling a conversation longer are signs that they are attracted to you. Also, a comfortable silence when you are together indicates romantic chemistry. All these shows they are amazed and intrigued by you and want to spend more time with you.

7. Physical touch

A simple touch could raise the adrenaline levels in the body, sparking chemical reactions that attract you to someone. Physical touch, here, refers to something beyond ‘accidental brushes against your skin.’ If they put their hand on your back while crossing the street, protectively maneuver you through a crowd, or try to hold your hand, they are obsessed with you.

8. No barriers

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It is a simple gesture that lets you know if the person you like is attracted to you. For example, if you two are out for dinner, they move the salt and pepper cellar on the table or a cushion placed in between. It shows they are crazy about you and are trying to get close to you.

9. Attentiveness

It is an essential sign to notice when you both are together. If someone is interested in you, they will be attentive to your words and actions. They may even look awed and enthralled by the way you speak. They will make eye contact while you speak. If they are easily distracted or not paying attention to your presence or comments, they may not be interested in you as you are.

Quick tip

Reciprocate their attention by being attentive to them. For instance, put your phone on silent and make frequent remarks/ask questions. It will demonstrate that you are listening and value their thoughts and feelings.

10. Initiative

If the person of your interest takes the lead to make plans, arranges surprises for you, takes care of small details, picks you up and drops you home, invites you for a show or dinner date, they are impressed by you. The person who is attracted to you will not wait for you to ask every time. They will be just as excited to make plans with you as you are. They may be tempted to spend more time with you, seeking opportunities to interact and deepen the connection.

11. Dilated pupils/ blinking

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The eyes say it all! It may sound technical but look into their eyes when you talk and see if their pupils dilate. Big, attentive eyes indicate that they are taking in as much of you as possible. Also, someone madly in love with you will try to hold your gaze and blink less.

12. Glowing skin

When you are around someone you like romantically or feel enticed by them, your heart beats faster. It makes the skin look flushed and glowing. Love interests activate happy hormones, which show up through a bright radiance in the skin. If they like you, they would be gleaming around you.

13. Vocal tone

You will notice that if you are admired by someone, they will try to sound sexy and personal. They would talk in deeper and slower tones and make you feel like their words are just for you. You may even notice their excitement as they talk.

14. Leaning in

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If you are desired by someone, that person often leans in to get closer to you or whispers something in your ears. They make excuses to be closer to you by moving the body forward to strengthening the conversation. It is because they are interested in you!

Research finds

A study suggests that during a brief “get-to-know-you” discussion, people tend to use flirting behaviors that correspond to their flirting style (2).

15. Introduction

The final scorer is that your love interest has invited you to meet their family or friends. It’s a way to get approval and include you in their close circle. But mind you, this introduction is only during intimate family get-togethers or in a small group. Don’t mistake a house party for 50 people at their house as a sign of interest!

Infographic: How To Know If Someone Is Mutually Attracted To You?

It can be really stressful for you if you like someone but aren’t sure if they feel the same way about you. Confessing is the best way to proceed in this situation. However, if you lack confidence or don’t want to risk losing their friendship, look for the obvious signs of mutual attraction in the infographic below.

Illustration: Momjunction Design Team

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Shreshtha DharM.A, M.Phil

Shreshtha Dhar is a licensed Clinical Psychologist with a professional experience of around seven years. Presently, she operates her private practice, Thought Craft, based out of Kolkata. She has special interest in the emotional and behavioral issues of both children and adults. Shreshtha has previously worked as a lecturer, published various research papers and contributed to magazines. She provides long...more

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