You like this wonderful guy and are confident he likes you too. But each time you try to get close to him, he acts aloof and cold. The moment you give up, he seems to be interested again. And as you try to be friendly, he becomes withdrawn.
Your instincts tell you that he likes you, but something stops him from getting close to you. You have no idea what it is, and you lose your mind wondering what to do in such a scenario.
Well, let us help you decode this complicated man of yours. Here are some reasons why guys act distant when they like you.
How To Be Sure That He Likes You?
- Whenever he is around, you sense his eyes on you, but when you look at him, it appears he looks the other way.
- He remembers any important detail you have shared with him and even does something about it.
- You often spot him hovering around you. He may not stare at you, but coincidentally, he is where you are.
- He likes all your social media posts, even if it is a bad image of you eating junk food.
- No matter how busy he is, his reply to your text comes almost immediately, as if he was waiting for your message.
If the guy in question shows all of these signs, you might be right about his admiration for you.
11 Reasons Why Guys Act Distant When They Like You
Here are some reasons why guys might keep their distance from the girl they like.
1. He feels you are out of his league
One of the obvious reasons why a guy may ignore or act disinterested in you is because he feels you are too good for him. He lacks the confidence to approach you or share his feelings with you, fearing you might reject him. He feels that sharing his true feelings might ruin your friendship with him. Or he fears being in painful one-sided love, so he thinks it is better not to act upon his feelings and maintain distance from you to avoid getting hurt.
2. He feels you are probably seeing someone
You may be someone who always posts images with your guy friends on social media. If he has been noticing you online and offline, he probably believes you are already in a relationship. He cannot help looking at you from a distance because is interested in you. However, the fear of rejection is so intense that he might act like he doesn’t notice you.
3. He is probably not looking for a serious relationship
There may be several reasons why a guy doesn’t want to get into a committed relationship. He may not be financially stable, or he may have recently had a breakup – it could be any other reason for that matter. Whatever the reason, he is not looking for something serious, and thus, he does not approach you even if he likes you.
4. He is already in a committed relationship
It could be that this guy is probably already seeing someone and yet is also attracted to you. Talking to you or being around you makes his feelings stronger, which he knows is unfair to his relationship. To be loyal to his current partner, he prefers to act disinterested and cold; and perhaps more so to discourage himself from getting swayed by temptation.
5. He is a shy guy
Guys who are shy can be terrible at expressing their love for someone. They may like you, but their shy nature keeps them from approaching you. In fact, talking to you might even make them nervous. They might come across as really rude, but it is how they are around an interest.
6. He wants to keep his options open
Much as this guy seems smitten by you, perhaps he feels the same for a few other women. If that is the case, he may want to weigh his options and may not make a move as he does not want to commit to one woman yet. Perhaps he does not want to settle for one person and wants more time enjoying his non-committed status and flirting with as many women as he can.
7. He wants you to want him more
Some guys do not want to look desperate before the girl they like. This guy is probably playing hard-to-get so that his disinterest in you gets you even more interested in him. One day, he will shower you with loads of attention, and the next day, he will go completely silent – blowing hot and cold. His inconsistent behavior will drive you crazy and keep you interested in him.
8. He thinks you are moving too fast
Let’s suppose this guy showed interest in you and approached you first. Much to his surprise, you got friendly too quickly and even started initiating things for both of you. Your obsession with him probably scares him. He may like you, but perhaps he has not yet reached a point to take your relationship to the next level. Your enthusiasm could put him off and make him cold towards you.
9. He feels you are just not that into him
You like him and enjoy his attention. You do not want to lose his interest, so you act hard-to-get. But after trying to woo you for a while, he is probably tired and feels you are not interested in him. So, he gives up and starts acting distant because he sees no point in trying to impress someone who is not into him.
10. He has other stuff to take care of
Perhaps someone in his family is ill, and he needs to be with them, or he has an important project to work on and does not want to be distracted. There could be many reasons that could be keeping him from messaging you or talking to you. This may not mean he has lost interest in you. It is just that his mind is occupied, and he has other stuff to deal with.
11. He needs some time to be sure of his feelings
Sometimes, guys withdraw from a situation to be able to see it from a different perspective. By keeping a distance from you, he is trying to see the relationship differently and understand if he really wants to keep this going. Also, he may want to see how he feels away from you and know if he misses you enough to have you in his life.
What Should You Do?
If you ever find yourself in a situation where the guy who you thought liked you has suddenly become cold toward you, don’t lose heart. It is not that he hates you. He could probably be dealing with something you are not aware of. Stay calm and try the following suggestions.
1. Give him time
You are probably at the end of your tether and don’t know how to get him to talk to you. But remember not to plead with him or force him to talk to you under any circumstance. It is easier said than done, but there is no denying that it is the best thing you can do. He is probably considering the situation in his head and needs time. If you act needy and crave his attention, it might put him off. So, the best thing to do is to wait for him to come around you.
2. Try to understand him
You may feel betrayed and hurt because of the sudden change in his behavior, but do not feel annoyed. Instead, try to understand him. He is probably battling his own self, trying to be sure of his feelings for you. If he has distanced himself from you, he probably has a valid reason for it. Respect his decision and try to be as normal as possible.
3. Don’t cut all ties
His silence may get to you, but do not cut all ties yet. He may want to reach out to you eventually when he has worked through his feelings. Blocking him on social media or severing ties may change his mind. Message him occasionally if you want to, but do not coax him to talk to you, nor exhibit extreme behaviors such as manipulation or ultimatums.
4. Focus on yourself
There is no point in stressing over someone you may probably never end up with. Instead, focus on yourself and use your free time to pursue a hobby or an activity you are passionate about. Your mental peace and wellness are more important than any guy in the world. Remember always to prioritize your well-being in such a situation.
5. Move on
Maybe what you fear is true, and he has probably lost interest in you. You may feel angry and justifiably so. But do not hold that resentment in your heart as it will only hurt you more. Instead, try to forget and move on in life. Some people are meant to make only a limited appearance in your life, so let go and move on. Find happiness with yourself and in your own life as you will meet a prospective partner when the time is right.
You may be head over heels for this guy, and so, his radio silence could make you lose sleep. But it might be the universe’s way of pushing you away from the person not meant for you, and in a direction more suitable to your life path. You are supposed to be with an awesome guy, so stop fretting over him and make way for the ‘right’ one for you.