It’s true. Nothing beats being a new mom! It’s a great feeling! But you know what else it is? Extremely overwhelming and exhausting! Every new day is a challenge you have to navigate through and weather with a brave face. From getting breastfeeding right to squeezing in a nap whenever you can, motherhood is not easy.
And anything that’s difficult is bound to leave you exhausted, frustrated, and wanting to scream out a few things! But as a new mom, you probably have to hold your tongue and let it slide – whether it’s out of obligations or the fear of being judged. Or maybe just the lack of desire to hurt anybody.
Well, whatever your reasons maybe, there are some things that must be spoken out (freedom of speech, right?). So if you’re not ready to make the speech, allow us to say it for you!
Here are 12 things every new mom wants to say but probably only does inside her head:
1. “I Have No Idea What I’m Doing!”
Yes, you’ve heard it many times before that motherhood is in a woman’s DNA. And it’s true that you sort of grow into the role when you become a mom. But can you find a woman who isn’t terrified of motherhood? It’s a Herculean task. The truth is that many of us feel lost sometimes and don’t exactly know what we’re doing. We just don’t say it out of the fear of judgment.
2. “Hey, I’m There Too, You Know.”
Although we can’t exactly blame the little one for being the center of attention, we can say that making the mother feel as if she’s invisible isn’t right either. It’s not necessary for your identity to be tied to your baby. A new mom is still all of those things she used to be before childbirth and deserves to be acknowledged.
3. “Please, I Need Help!”
Don’t ever think that asking for help implies you’re not doing a good job at motherhood! You really don’t have to do everything alone. Actually, you shouldn’t! So don’t feel bad asking for help whenever you need it, from whoever you need it.
4. “I Don’t Need to Share My Birth Story Unless I Want To.”
Nobody needs to be privy to your experience with childbirth. It’s a purely personal moment. And you don’t have to share the story with anybody. Unless, of course, you want to. In that case, you should go ahead. But if you want to keep it intimate, you have the choice.
5. “Nah, I Don’t Need To Lose The Baby Weight Immediately.”
It’s common to expect women to lose baby weight right after delivery. That’s not only ridiculous but absolutely unsafe for the new mom too. It’s very unrealistic to expect a woman’s body to bounce right back to top form after pregnancy and labor. You don’t need to live up to this crazy expectation. And no, it doesn’t mean you’re lazy if you don’t want to lose all the weight right away.
6. “Visitors! Please, Go Home.”
It’s great that everybody wants to meet your baby and shower them with attention. But the new mom needs some space. She’s already overwhelmed and exhausted by the countless baby duties she suddenly needs to take care of! At this time, it’s really difficult for her to be the perfect hostess. So do the kind thing and maybe book a hotel room and let mommy bond with her new family.
7. “You Don’t Need To Know My Work Plans.”
Everyone wants to know whether you’d be back to work or a stay at home mom. But truth to be told, you are in no way obligated to discuss your plans with anybody. Again, if you want to, you can and should. But if you think you need to justify your plans to nosy minds, you don’t. Nobody knows what’s best for your family better than you do.
8. “Bring Food If You’re Coming To See The Baby.”
It’s a demand she’ll never make even if she needs it. So why not do it for her unasked? If you’re going to see the baby, always get some food. Chances are she’s maxed out and probably doesn’t have the time to cook. So a little comfort will go a long way!
9. “Don’t Touch Me.”
It’s not something many people realize, but new mothers often don’t feel comfortable in their new skin. Pregnancy and labor bring several changes in a woman’s body — some painful, some permanent. At this point, she likely won’t want to be touched till she can feel like herself again. Don’t take it the wrong way. Just give her some space.
10. “I Really Want/Need A Break.”
Just as she needs help, she needs a break too. Society has taught women that after her baby is born, she should completely sacrifice everything else and devote her entire being to her baby. If you take out time for yourself or do something you like, you run the risk of being a selfish mother. But that’s grossly inaccurate! Taking care of yourself is important and an essential part of your well-being. So if you feel like spending some ‘me-time’, you should. Without guilt.
11. “My Baby Is Cuter Than Yours.”
It’s a fact of life. To a new mom, the apple of her eye is the prettiest baby ever! No questions about it. It’s the undeniable truth!
12. “I Didn’t Ask For Your Unsolicited Advice.”
And honestly, you don’t need it either.
So there you have it! New moms, we feel you. And we understand what you go through.