Society is our biggest prison! While this might be a harsh statement, several circumstances prove that society judges every person for the choices they make, irrespective of what they are. Everyone is a victim of this but women tend to face more of the backlash. Wondering how or why? Let’s look at a couple of reasons. If a woman is divorced, her character is judged and no one looks at the man differently. Another instance is when a couple chooses a life without kids. In such a situation, the woman often faces the brunt of criticism and a whole lot of judgment. But the husband is not answerable to society. It’s a strange world we live in, but we are here to tell you what you should NOT tell women who do not want children:
1. “You’ll Only Know The Meaning Of True Love When You Have Children”
Every human being has the opportunity to experience love. It’s a complex emotion that people don’t understand. While mothers are biologically inclined to love their children, it is wrong to say that true love only comes from having children. Sorry to disappoint you, but some of us found our true love in furry babies.
2. “Children Will Change Your Life For The Better”
Um, sorry but some of our lives are pretty great right now! No doubt that children may brighten some of your lives but making a declaration of that is not justified. Because as much as they are a blessing, some women do not wish to cope with the stress, sleep deprivation, financial liability, and lack of personal time that comes with having a baby. They consciously make a choice to live a life without children and are happy with it.
3. “You Are Being Selfish”
Well, you are being condemnatory! Being a mother is a great privilege, no doubt. But when you call a woman selfish for choosing not to have kids, you are implying that every parent is selfless. Is that really the case? There are several parents out there who have children but fail to give them the support they need, financially or emotionally.
4. “Do You Hate Children?”
Um, are you stupid? We choose to live a little differently. That doesn’t mean we hate children. The vision we have for our lives is quite different from yours. That’s about it. We still love our nieces and nephews, godchildren, and even our neighbors’ kids.
5. “You Haven’t Achieved Anything If You Don’t Have Kids”
Sadly, people disregard the numerous accomplishments of a woman solely because she doesn’t have kids. A woman could be the CEO of a company, a doctor who saves lives every day or could have even landed on the moon. But do any of these things matter in our society if you don’t have kids? *facepalm*
6. “Who Is Going To Give Me Grandchildren?”
Once a couple is married, this is one of the most frequently asked questions. Having children is a huge responsibility and it can’t be a decision made on the whim. But some people don’t get that, do they? Isn’t it selfish to emotionally blackmail us into having kids?
7. “What Is Your Life’s Purpose?”
First, perhaps, not to poke my nose into others’ private lives. (Jk, or am I?) Many people believe that their purpose on this earth is to procreate. Sadly, they don’t realize that times have moved forward and there are several opportunities out there to feel fulfilled. A woman’s purpose is not restricted to just having kids and it’s time people realize that!
8. “You’ll Regret It When You Get Older”
Another common misconception is that children will make you feel less lonely when you get older. But is that true? Children don’t always stay with their parents when they get older. They move on to start their own families and live separate lives. Besides, women who choose not to have kids will have the time to focus on other things that will keep them company in their old age. Like pets, gardening, friends, etc. Even retirement homes are becoming wildly popular these days.
9. “Who Will Carry On Your Legacy?”
Someone’s legacy is not necessarily their children. The idea of leaving behind something meaningful after your days in this world is something we all think about. But it could be anything. A book, music, a story, an invention. Pretty sure, Albert Einstein’s legacy is the Theory of Relativity and not his children!
While having children is a blessing to some women, others choose a different life and we should not judge them for it. It’s a choice and no one has the right to tell them it’s wrong. Women are multifaceted creatures who have so much to give to this world besides being a mother. It’s time we acknowledge and respect that! Share with us your thoughts in the comments below.