Raising kids is a flex! From when they are babies to when they have grown up into responsible adults, it’s a never-ending duty of guidance, patience, and understanding. Most parents would probably agree that the toughest phase of parenthood is when their kids are in their teenage years. It’s outright brutal sometimes because kids are usually rebellious at this stage. They like to experiment, explore and find their unique identity. They might be afraid to be open with their parents for fear of judgment. If you’re a parent with a teenager, pat yourself on the back for taking a step to understand your teenage kids rather than fighting them. Perhaps it will make things easier for both of you and strengthen your relationship. We’ve listed nine things every teenager wants their parents to know, so keep reading:
1. Every Conversation Need Not Be A Lesson
Most parents complain that teenagers don’t share anything with them. Ever wondered why that is? Sometimes, kids just want a friend. They want someone to listen to them without judgment, but that is usually never the case with parents. And when you are friends with them, they can confide their fears and struggles with you more easily. Stop criticizing their choices and take a step back from turning every conversation into a life lesson!
2. They Get Stressed, Tired, And Anxious Too
It’s not easy being a kid in today’s world, especially when you’re in your teenage years. Kids have several reasons to get stressed and tired too. So, do not discount these things just because they are kids. The pressure of school, exams, assignments, and high school drama can make them anxious, which is entirely normal. Having to deal with so many things at once, it becomes irritating if the parents keep breathing down their necks. They wish the parents would just take a step back at times and just let them be.
3. Their Rooms Are Their Safe Space
How often have you complained about your teen kids spending time in their rooms? Why is this a bad thing? Just like you like to relax and spend some alone time after a long day, your kids want to do the same too. Imagine if you were constantly interrupted while reading your favorite book or watching a television show. Would you like that? Of course not.
Yes it is important to encourage them to spend time outside at times but if they seem too reluctant don’t push too hard. Better way would be to engage them in certain activities which would naturally take them out of their rooms without them complaining about it.
4. Stop Forcing Them Into Things They Don’t Like
Teenage is when kids figure out their likes, dislikes, interests, and passions (well, mostly). During this time, don’t force your dreams on them. It’s their life — let them follow their dreams! Most parents wish that their kids fulfill their own dreams of becoming lawyers, doctors, astronauts, or dancers. Stop doing this!
5. Respect Their Privacy
A big problem for most parents, privacy is something that is a privilege for most teenage kids. Remember that the more you pry into your lives, the more secretive they’ll get. Trust yourself — that you’ve raised them with good values for 13+ years. Trust your kids — that they will come to you if they need you. But the more you violate their privacy, the more they will want to hide things from you. It’s only natural, don’t you think?
When you see your child upset, you would want to know what happened to help them. But remember that asking them what’s wrong repeatedly and bugging them when they don’t want to tell you is exactly the kind of thing that makes them super annoyed. Pro tip: don’t assume that they are upset because a boyfriend/girlfriend fought with them. It’s stupid, ridiculous, and irritating!
7. Appreciate Them Instead Of Criticizing Them
Yes, teenagers can be super annoying, but they are rarely appreciated when they do something right. A teen kid may be studying for two hours, but the minute they take a break and start using their phone is when you’ll probably notice them. Parents often look for opportunities to find some fault in their teen kids. Maybe try a different approach and appreciate their goodness too?
8. Follow A Give-And-Take Method
Any relationship works well when there’s a compromise, and that includes your relationship with your teenage kids! Teenagers are young adults, and they would like to be treated like it. Telling a teen kid, “Because I told you so”, is just an invitation to disaster. Try talking to them like you would speak to an adult. Give them reasons and explain to them. Maybe if you’re more open with them, they’ll learn to be more open with you.
9. They Love You; It’s Just Hard To Show It
As teenagers, there is a lot of change happening, physically, emotionally, and mentally. So, it might be hard for teens to show their love and affection towards you. But remember that they appreciate you. They might not show it, but they love and respect you. They are grateful for everything you do for them. It might be a task for them to express themselves to you, so be the bigger person and show them you love them even when they frustrate you.
Parents learn a lot from their children, but only if they are willing to put their ego aside and listen to their kids. If you pay attention to your kids without preconceived biases, you will learn a hell of a lot from them. Therefore, be patient and understanding through this journey of parenthood. After all, you want to build a strong relationship with your kids that will only grow deeper with time. What are your thoughts on this? Let us know in the comments below! Also, share this article with your teenage kids and ask them if they can relate!