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We have all faced some shade or the other in the name of advice. More so by close family relatives who don’t hesitate to share their unsolicited opinions disguised as digs in our personal matters, especially when you are a married woman with no kids! Rhea happens to be one of such married women and is sick of this unsolicited stereotypical advice thrown at her. This article is a narrative about the time she finally gave these ‘well-wishing’ advisors a taste of their own medicine.
Since the time Rhea and Varun got married, they would spend Diwali at Varun’s Chachi‘ ‘s place. Like the past four years, Geeta Chachi arranged an informal family get-together with all the distant relatives collected in one area—which was literally Rhea’s worst nightmare come alive. As usual, in one corner of the party, the men surrounded the food and drinks bar, whereas, on the other end, the women sat on a tightly placed sofa, swooning and giggling over some new gossip. Following the tradition of the party, Rhea headed to the women’s area while Varun headed towards the group of laughing men to grab his first chicken tikka.
Rhea hadn’t finished greeting the second aunty of the group before she heard a “Why aren’t you pregnant yet!” from somewhere within the large crowd of aunties. It wasn’t a polite question, nor was it a worrisome inquiry—it was a statement with a sprinkle of unauthorized expectation that represented the entire group’s emotion. Rhea knew what was going to happen next—and it did! Like every other time, the group of aunties started a rant of advice and a bunch of DIYs for getting pregnant. Sabeena Bua began the conversation with, “Beta, look at your age. You should start trying now only. Actually, try tonight! Give Varun some hot milk and then…you know. Just make sure there is…erm, you know what I mean.” Rachna Massi followed with a “And if it gets a little difficult, then I have a doctor that you can go to; he is pretty good. My family friend just had a baby and all thanks to that doctor”. From the other end of the circle, Anita aunty ridiculed Rachna Massi’s advice saying that “It’s not that complicated baccha! Forget the doctor and just make sure you do it in these positions, and you will be fine.” She further suggested a couple of positions that not only ensured getting pregnant but also ensured a specific gender of the baby.
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Surrounded by this endless chant that roughly boiled down to—”Just have a baby already!”; Rhea could see that in the opposite corner of the room, Varun was hogging down another plate of chicken tikka while discussing the recent changes in the IPL teams. Almost abruptly, she got up and hurried towards him. He was in the middle of a conversation with one of the uncles. Without hesitation, she cut the uncle’s sentence midway and asked Varun to come with her. While the uncle took his time in overcoming Rhea’s audacity, Varun just slipped away, looking at Rhea with a combination of concern and confusion. Without losing any time, Rhea took Varun to the world she was being exposed to—the sofa built gossip castle on the opposite end of the room.
“Yes, Aunty, so what were you saying about the position? Varun wants to know as well.” Rhea prompted while addressing the whole group. “Who should have an orgasm and when? Which doctor should I go to? Do you have a doctor for Varun too?” Rhea nudged again. All the aunties shared a mixture of embarrassment and astonishment. While Varun just noticed the little teardrop rolling down Rhea’s cheek.
What is the moral of the story here, you ask? In one line—mind your own business, aunties! Let the man and woman decide when and if they want a baby. ‘Decide’, ‘when’, and ‘if’ being the operative words! Let people be and keep your unnecessary unsolicited advice to yourself.
