When my pregnancy test came positive at the hospital, I was a mixed bag of emotions. Although I was extremely happy, I was a nervous ball of anxiety too. I knew one thing for sure – despite all the wisdom that previously pregger friends shared with me, mine would be completely different than theirs’. No two women usually experience the same issues during their pregnancies, for that matter.
Pregnancy from your friends’ and relatives’ point of view is always glorified – “Wow! You’re going to be a mum soon,” said one. A cousin shrieked that she couldn’t wait to see whose features the baby gets, “I’m so excited.” “That explains your glow already!” “Don’t strain yourself,” “Don’t lift the weight,” etc. These kinds of statements might give an impression that a pregnant woman needs to walk on velvet or be treated like a queen. However, the reality is obviously not so. Not only can it be quite exhausting physically and emotionally, but it can also be embarrassing at times too. And no, by that I don’t mean the bump that starts showing. That is the least of your worries.
With our hormones all over the place during pregnancy, we pretty much lose control over most things. One of my friends had developed a weird body odor during her pregnancy. She could do nothing about it accept drench herself in perfume to ward off the smell. Another would sweat like a pig even during cold winters. And I had lost control over my bladder, unfortunately. Being a working woman, I had planned on taking my maternity leave at the fag end of my gestational period. Initially, it took me a while to get used to moving around. However, as my pregnancy progressed to the final trimester, it was an ordeal to visit the bathroom frequently. This would also embarrass me in front of the colleague who sat close to the washroom (the fact that I secretly had a harmless crush on him only made it worse!).
Now, keeping these things in mind imagine my horror when I had the most embarrassing moment at the office one day. As usual, soon after the latest trip to the loo, the baby kicked my bladders so hard I had to rush again. But this time, just when I’d stepped inside the loo, I ended up leaking a bit into my undies. Anyways, I got done with the job on hand first. And then, I stood staring in the blank space for a while thinking what to do next. After some thought, I pulled out the panties, wrapped them in the cover meant for sanitary pads, and dumped them. There went my precious branded lingerie!
As I headed back to my desk, my head was buzzing – did someone notice I was all commando? Do I smell of pee? Will someone spot the undies in the bin? Oh God! I hope this day gets over soon! And it did get over – the day, but not the ordeal. I remember how I’d called up my mom, sis, and even my husband when it happened first. I was so embarrassed by the office incident, that I even broke down as I spoke to my husband. While each of them tried to convince me it was all normal, I could not get over the anxiety and panic it had caused me. Thereafter, there were several such instances – at a family wedding; a friend’s farewell party, and even during my regular walk in the park. By now, though, I had made my peace with it. Funnily, I even used to carry a sanitary pad to save the day for me.
It’s been three years since this incident. I’m pregnant for the second time now. When I look back, I can easily count it as my most embarrassing moment during pregnancy. I’ve even shared this with a couple of friends only to hear back amusing stories of theirs’. However, this time it is different for me. Although the incontinence is slowly catching up, I’m more than reassured that I’m not alone in all this.
What about you? Have you too faced an embarrassing moment during your pregnancy? Do share with us. And remember, you too are not alone!