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I had never heard or seen a mother breastfeeding her older child till I saw a girl of about five on a bus jostling with her mom to what was supposed to be her rightful ‘meal.’ Not much later I gathered from other mothers that their children refused to wean beyond their toddler-stage. Is this startling? Not until you become a mother and either choose to or are compelled to feed an older child.
The moment you hear the word ‘breastfeeding’ the only vision one carries is that of a tiny baby latching onto the breasts of its mother. You don’t imagine a toddler or a little older than a toddler breastfeeding. We carry such image because most children who are past the toddler stage are not nursed in public – they do it secretly at home. Doctors encourage mothers to breastfeed till their child is two. But then most of the children who are breastfed until two refuse to wean. There is something about breastfeeding that puts many onlookers off you. They will be appalled at you nursing a post-toddler stage child. The worse part is you will almost protest if you had to stop feeding your child. But here are five myths associated with breastfeeding older children that will make you think again:
1. Pumping It Out Is A Neat Job
This is what you will start hearing from people who witness you feeding your older child. People will ask you why you wouldn’t want to use pump out your milk and feed your child through a bottle. You will try finding means to blurt out the exact answer. On one hand you know that children seek mother’s feed because it has other factors attached to it – emotional security, it feels cozy, and children have the natural urge to suckle. So while you could pump and store your milk, the mechanical feed would do nothing good to your child emotionally.
2. Your Child Will Bite You
Ouch! Yes, children do so when they develop teeth. But it’s also a passing phase. Normally children don’t bite intentionally while they nurse. If they bite, it’s because they bite. And you will try to find ways to tackle the issue.
3. It Will Be Embarrassing When They Ask For Feed As Older Children
You will have code words and sign language. Somehow your children will also be conscious of asking in public! So don’t worry that they will do that insane thing of asking you to go bare at once. They are looking for pacification. Honestly, as they keep growing, so will they develop the sense and responsibility for self-soothing. So you wouldn’t need to worry much. It all resolves by itself.
4. Your Child Will Not Forget The Feeding Episodes
Yes, if you don’t stop breastfeeding when your kids are past the infancy stage, the reason they won’t want to wean is that they ‘remember’ breastfeeding very well in their minds. They associate it with everything that makes them feel good about it – the comfort, emotional security, and the details like the smell and taste of it that will tag on to them for years to come.
5. If Your Child Canât Stop Now, Then He Wonât Stop Later
That’s a concern even mothers have. But they secretly want their children to keep nursing. However, the time arrives for weaning too. Your child’s lifestyle will change and so will there be a lesser and lesser demand for your feed. You might be reducing the frequency of feed, restricting it to a one-time thing, perhaps at bed time. Gradually even this habit will be replaced by activities like story-telling at bed time that will take over the past urges to nurse.
While you might have been rebuked, but the day will arrive when your child will wean naturally. You don’t have to work hard for it. Simply follow your gut instinct and enjoy the close moments with your kid.
