Dear World: It's Not Just About The New Baby After Mom Gives Birth – She Matters Too

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Motherhood is a wonderful experience. There’s no doubt about that! Holding the little one in your arms for the first time is something words cannot explain. It’s a moment of pure magic! And we’re sure nobody would disagree with us on this. The tiny tot, with their tiny arms and tiny feet, takes only a moment to start ruling the hearts of everyone around! And everyone wants to meet this little bundle of joy! All the time.

While it’s amazing that a baby receives so much love from the moment they’re born, hearing the question ‘When can I meet the baby?’ can get exhausting in no time for a new mother. New moms have to hear this question all too often. Sometimes even before they’ve left the hospital or have gotten the chance to catch up on lost sleep. Some people are in such a hurry that they don’t even wait for the post-delivery clean up before asking to meet the baby.

Their phone starts to buzz with a million texts and phone calls. Most of them asking the same thing – ‘When can I come to meet your baby?’ Even as they try to adjust themselves to their newborn and the new normal, there’s simply no escaping this inevitable question.

But here’s the thing. While the newborn should, no doubt, be the center of everyone’s attention, the mom should also get her own space in that circle. That is to say; a new mom deserves just as much attention, love, and care as the brand new little one in her arms.

Life For A New Mom Is Difficult

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New mothers go through a lot of changes during pregnancy and after. Changes that can last almost up to a year after giving birth; and can be quite difficult to go through. Post-delivery, a new mother might experience wild hormonal changes with bouts of shakiness and weakness coupled with night sweats (1). And that’s just the beginning!

Their breasts might feel sore and engorged. And no matter how they choose to deliver – naturally or via a C-section – their uterus will contract, causing pain and discomfort.

That’s not all. They’ll continue to bleed for around six weeks after delivery and will experience discomfort and soreness in their incision or nether regions, or both. Peeing can turn into a problem, and it might get difficult to keep the bladder in control. Her muscles will feel weak, making lifting anything a Herculean task. And we mean ANYTHING.

Not to mention the constant pangs of hunger, the stretch marks and the varicose veins, the acne and the hair loss, along with blurry and out of focus vision (2), (3), (4). All of these things combined can take a toll on her and make her feel like a completely different person from who she used to be. When a new mother looks into the mirror, she sees the reflection of a woman she can no longer recognize.

Add to that the loss of sleep and increased responsibilities that keep her exhausted all the time, and it becomes easy to see why a new mom deserves all the attention, love, and care she can get.

Give Her The Space To Breathe

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So, the next time you drop by her house to see her baby, ask her how she’s doing first. Meet her and offer her a safe space to heal and rest. Even to vent if needed. Bond with her and show her that you care about her and want to know what she’s going through.

Be there for her if she needs you, and don’t shy away from lending her a helping hand. She has a lot on her plate, and any help she can get will always be welcome. Even if it’s just sitting there patiently, listening to her talk about her experiences as a mother and how motherhood has changed her life.

That’s not to say you shouldn’t spend time admiring her baby and playing with them. Do that. But don’t forget about her. Because she’s just as important too.

So offer her the nurturing environment she deserves and be a support system for her. She’ll appreciate it more than she can ever say.