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As parents we worry about our kids constantly. We worry about their health, who they make friends with, their grades and if they’re wearing enough sunblock. A lot of our energy is devoted to ensuring they have the best quality of life and a good future. This means emphasizing on the importance of doing well academically in order to get into a prestigious university and secure a stable job. But what about their quality of life and their ability to handle dense emotions? A child’s emotional intelligence is as important, if not more, in order to ensure a good life. It helps them become successful at work and teaches them how to deal with people. Not to mention it improves communication skills and helps you deal with stress in healthy ways. And the only way a child can be so well-rounded is to grow up in a stable family that encourages positive traits. Here are 4 parenting tips that can help your children in the long run:
1. Don’t Avoid Negative Emotions
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No one likes it when their feelings are neglected. Ignoring your child’s negative emotions or blaming them for exhibiting them will leave them disheartened and confused. They may get scared of experiencing negative emotions due to your reproach or indifference when really, they are very normal. When your child is grappling with negative emotions, it is best to acknowledge them and address them. Pretending like everything’s fine when they aren’t, does not promote emotional intelligence. In fact, it stifles it. Your child should be able to identify what they are feeling and work through it accordingly.
2. Respect And Honor Your Kid’s Tears
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This goes hand in hand with point 1. Allow your children to process their emotions in healthy ways, one of which is crying. Telling your child not to cry will only make it harder for them to stop. Not to mention that they will start to think that they should feel fine by force and never acknowledge their emotions again. This may cause them to develop self doubt and anxiety in the long run. Crying is a sure indicator of your child’s emotions and ignoring them will only lower your kid’s self confidence. Tell your children that it is perfectly okay to cry if they feel like it. Validate their feelings of sadness and hurt. Then you can teach them how to dust themselves off and carry on!
3. Allow Your Kids To Discover Their Triggers
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Sit them down and figure out what makes them sad or anxious. Sometimes even your child doesn’t know what sets them off or puts them in a mood. Some of the most common explanations for frustration are new social situations and unexpected changes. So, if you’re planning on shifting them to a new school or shift houses, gear up for the big emotions coming your way. You can also prepare them for negative emotions by explaining the situation to them beforehand so that they are not completely caught off guard. Just because your kids are little doesn’t mean you don’t have to consider their feelings.
Look out for common physical triggers like hunger and fatigue. Ask your child to tell you when they are starting to get hungry or tired so that you can rectify the situation before they start feeling restless. This will come in handy in the long run as your kids will know what situations to avoid and how to deal with a crisis calmly.
4. Phrasing Things Differently In Order To Boost Their Self Confidence
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Where does your child get their self confidence from? Is it because of exterior validation or an internal sense of satisfaction with the things they do? The latter is what they should hope to achieve. This can make your child feel more worthy on the inside and boost their self confidence.
Another way to do this is to ask your child how they feel about an activity they are doing. Instead of telling them that they are doing great, ask them for their opinion on what they are doing. This will teach them that you value their input and perspective which can also boost their confidence.
Being a parent can be hard work, especially when you’re trying to teach your kids how to be good people. Figuring out what to do and what not to do in order to raise emotionally aware and responsible adults doesn’t have to be tricky as long as you keep these pointers in mind. Happy parenting!
