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As every good parent knows, setting boundaries and limits for your little ones from an early age is extremely important. As much as we want our kids to like us, and want them to see us as a friend, we are first and foremost their parents. And that comes with the responsibility of discipling them and guiding them, so that they know right from wrong. Setting limits for your kids entails establishing a clear guideline for behavior, even if it’s not an official house rule. Parents are far too busy to set a rule about everything and sometimes need to establish limits on the go so that their kids understand what behaviors are acceptable and what to do away with. However, setting these limits and sticking to them isn’t always as easy as it seems. After all, kids are very good at getting out of trouble and as a parent, you are bound to feel guilty and give in to them from time to time. So why is it important to set limits and how do you stick to them? If you want to know more, read on!
1. Limits Teach Kids Self-Discipline
Setting limits teaches your kids the important and invaluable skill of self-discipline. When you say things like “It’s time to stop playing and do your homework” or “Don’t bang your food against the table at dinner”, you are teaching your kids how to be disciplined and responsible. Your goal as a parent is to make sure that your child eventually learns to manage their responsibilities by themselves and this is a great first step to ensure that that happens. Help your child develop strategies that will impose limits on themselves so that they learn restraint and how to be patient. You can also teach them how to be efficient by setting a timer to 10 minutes and asking them to beat the timer while they get ready in the morning. These small things go a long way.
2. Limits Keep Kids Safe
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Here’s another reason to establish limits that most parents don’t take under consideration. Limits teach your kids how to keep themselves safe. Although it may be safe for your kids to play outside, they need limits so that they know where they are allowed to go, what places to avoid and who not to talk to while playing outside. This also extends to internet usage. Teaching your kids limits will keep them from accessing dangerous sites and talking to strangers on the internet. And these limits should expand as your kid starts to mature. Give your child the opportunity to show you that they are learning to be autonomous and responsible, within the limits that you’ve given them. You can also create behavior management contracts to help your child understand concrete ways you’ll recognize when they need fewer limits.
3. Limits Keep Kids Healthy
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Most kids, by nature, are impulsive and crave immediate gratification. It’s your job as a parent to teach them the virtue of patience and health, especially when it comes to monitoring their eating habits. Without limits many kids would eat junk food all day long which will only lead to a tummy ache and other long-term consequences. And setting limits means telling your kids that they can’t have a third cookie or that they can only have that chocolate after they’ve finished their meal. And no, this isn’t a bad thing. You need to teach your kids to make healthy choices so that they don’t go overboard. Everything in moderation. This also extends towards exposure to electronic devices. Limits provide boundaries for kids. So that they can exercise, stay hygienic, active and healthy.
4. Limits Help Kids Cope With Uncomfortable Emotions
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Negative emotions can be uncomfortable to experience, especially when you don’t know how to cope with them. Sometimes parents put off setting limits because they don’t want to make their kids sad or angry. But learning to deal with these uncomfortable feelings at an early stage is an important skill to have. Just because your child is upset that they didn’t get another chocolate doesn’t mean that they should be given it. Sure it might solve the problem momentarily, but the long term damage will be far worse. Instead teach your kids the importance of delayed gratification and how to adhere to the limits you’ve placed on them. Coach their efforts and try to deal with their frustration and anger in healthy ways.
Teaching your child to behave well and stay within their limits is no easy task. But if you stay consistent and don’t compromise on them, your kids will soon fall in line. Happy parenting!
