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Small tiffs and fights are common among couples. In fact, as we grudgingly admit, they actually add a dash of spice to our lives. However, be as it may, those frequent fights with your better half does tire you out, no doubt. And the frequency of such squabbles increases when a baby enters your life. Agreed that a baby cements your bond further, but still, a lot of times the baby becomes the very cause of such fights. Why is that so? Let us tell you 5 common reasons why you’d end up fighting with your husband after having a baby:
1. Varied Parenting Approach
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It is quite normal for couples to have a different approach to parenting. From the kind of diapers to use to the right way of holding the baby, almost everything might start off a debate. As a mother, you might become too cautious when it comes to your baby’s needs. Whereas your husband, being an equally caring father, might tilt either towards a more traditional approach or a rational one. The best way to deal with this situation is to plan things together and come to a common understanding.
2. Unequal Distribution Of Responsibilities
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One of the common grouse that most new moms have is when the arrival of a baby does not change their daily routine even a wee bit. They’ll still be doing the dishes, cooking and cleaning, and other household chores along with the added baby’s poop-feed-sleep care. All this, while the husbands get the best part upon returning home from work – playing with the baby just when you’ve changed and cleaned him/her. This is because most men are made to believe that their responsibility is to ‘provide’ for their family, which basically means earning money. However, husbands need to set aside these age-old beliefs and get more involved in a baby’s care and upbringing. In the long run, it’ll only create a more healthy home atmosphere and a strong family bonding.
3. Lack Of Love Life
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Of course, your love life takes the biggest hit after childbirth. Since your body needs some time to heal, it is quite understandable that you’ll not feel up to it for a while. And with the baby around, both of you will end up spending more time with the baby than with each other. This may lead to physical frustrations and frictions as well. However, remember that it is a phase. And, it is not always necessary to indulge in intimate sessions to keep the spark alive. Having dinner together, cuddling up to each other when the baby is asleep, or even simple hugs and goodbye kisses will take some of the pressure off your mind.
4. Insufficient Sleep
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A woman’s daily routine changes once the baby is born. And sleep is an immediate casualty of this change. With the baby waking up frequently for diaper changes and feeding, a new mother is bound to get stressed and tired. Especially for the first few weeks. This consistent insufficiency of sleep makes her irritable and anxious, which may cause her to break down for the silliest reasons, resulting in fights. A husband needs to understand this. He can try and pitch in at least during the weekends to help his wife catch up on some sleep and rest better. That way, she’ll be better positioned to face the new week with less frayed nerves.
5. Fitting Into A New Role
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A woman looks forward to becoming a mother for the longest time. Still, when a baby eventually arrives in her life, it does take her some time to accept and settle into this new role. From being just a wife and an individual, she’s suddenly a mother, which means a whole lot of responsibility towards a tiny being. It is bound to make her feel overwhelmed and nervous; something that a husband might not realize. So, don’t shy away from discussing your fears and anxiety with your spouse. It helps to make your partner understand that settling into this new and demanding role will take time.
These are some of the reasons that might cause frictions between you and your husband. However, with a little bit of patience and understanding, we’re sure both of you will easily sail through this phase. Good luck!
