Women who are pregnant for the first time take every word of fellow women seriously, especially if they are kin, or have been pregnant. But, what may seem ‘normal’ to you, may not be normal for another pregnant mom. It’s a different experience for every woman, although there are few common traits; and this probably explains why some commonly peddled assumptions about pregnancy turn out to be ‘myths’ at the end of it all. Here are some glorified myths, which you may, or may not, experience:
1. You Will Often Be Tired
The truth is, you are only just short of falling asleep on the driver’s seat. So, all you preggos out there, before you even make up your mind to pull out the car and save the day. If you are already slouching when you step out of the house, it’s a clear sign you don’t want to drive. Ask you, husband, to drive or simply hail a cab. Fatigue and no rest during pregnancy are a recipe for disaster!
2. You Will Have Glowing Skin
I have known women who turned into ugly ducklings, with patches of the skin, freckles, darkness, tanned like never before – even if not exposed to the sun. So I least understand what glowing skin means. Again, the granny’s tale would have it that your skin would glow if you are carrying a girl and would be pathetic if you are carrying a boy – utter rubbish I guess – I never experienced these tales in reality. For the glow – know that it’s pregnancy slime called sweat.
3. Your Breasts Will Enlarge
Enlarge? ‘Monstrous’ is a better word. Yeah, we could put Pamela Anderson to shame. What could be next to a 34DD size? We define it the best. The only qualm would be not being able to wear the favorite tees or the shirts we were famous for – at least not until we have birthed and our baby has weaned.
4. You Could Be A Little Hormonal
Again, the crucial understatement. ‘Hysterical’ more like! Haven’t you seen so much melodrama going on at pregnancy homes? God alone knows why they cry, but the overflowing tears are as good as a saline face-wash, so yes, all you will need is to have loads of tissues to wipe them off – no one can rescue at this point.
5. You Will Notice A Tiny Bump
There is no such thing as a tiny bump, I guess. A bump is a bump and is as good as a watermelon. Or may be bigger than that. In some it would accentuate like the only protrusion, in other women, the entire body would bloat while still showing that massive protrusion. You don’t have to be subtle in saying, ‘a little bump.’
6. You May Be More Gassy
This one could be a bit true to be untrue. In fact, it’s like just being short of the hot-air-balloons. We don’t levitate, but we could feel like sprinting away to the loneliest place and expel the flatulence – just so you guys could remain in your seat enjoying your time. But, it could be horrible even with a vegetarian or a vegan diet. I bet, my dog being fed with yogurt and rice could do better!
7. A Denser And Faster Growing Hair
Use it for a television commercial or a slogan. But, I can’t imagine the hair I would shed and the sebum that the pores secrete making the hair greasier than when applying a gel. And brushing the hair would seem like the hairs just rolled about in butter. Or maybe I could leave it that way as a new saloon-look trendsetter. Any takers?
8. It’s Normal To Have A Slightly Heightened Sense Of Smell
Only slightly? It won’t be an exaggeration to say that the FBI could hire us for their sniffer dogs. I mean, how could we manage to get the smell of a rotten stalk right through the neighbor’s walls? I guess, it’s not the odor infusing in the air – or it’s just that we are getting ‘too nosy.’
9. You Will Have The ‘Pregnancy Brain’ At Work
I would call it the master of ‘Absent Mindedness.’ You will have strokes of Alzheimer’s I guess. Towards the end of a two-hour search for your shades, you will realize you are wearing them already – making it too ‘cool’ to be pregnant.
10. Your Libido Will Rise
This one will never be on the pregnancy best-practices, I guess. You don’t want to be choked, nor do you wish to squeeze your baby – ouch. Abstinence is the golden rule for now.