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Has this question got most of you thinking? This is because more often than not, most husbands do not disclose their salaries to their wives. Recently, a popular investment company conducted a survey. They asked a group of couples, around 1000 in number, about the amount of salary that their respective spouses earned. These questions were asked separately to both, the husband and the wife. The results showed that nearly 40 percent of these couples got this question wrong, including those households where a woman was earning more than her husband. So, what makes men lie about their salaries to their wives?
There is no specific answer to it as it depends on each couple’s financial and relationship status. Like Deepak Mehra, an investment banker, suggests that a lot of times it may be due to trust issues between the husband and the wife. Married for nearly 10 years, he further adds that at times, depending on the situation, a husband is forced to lie to his wife. He says that many men feel once their wives know about their salaries, they may increase their expenses or spend their hard-earned money shopping for unnecessary stuff.
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However, Nakul Singh, a businessman, has a different point of view altogether. He feels he has never felt answerable to his wife regarding his salary as he takes care of all the household expenditures like monthly bills, his wife’s general expenses, and the school fees of their kids. He had an interesting take though. His marriage being arranged, where his parents chose his wife, it was only his wife’s parents who had enquired about his salary and earnings. This is usually done by a girl’s parents before marriage to ensure that their daughter will have a sound future, financially.
Where the men seemed to have their own viewpoints, women too had different views. Shivani Verma, a writer, believes a lot of times husbands are prejudiced towards their wives because of which they lie about their salary. According to her, men almost always assume that once their wives get to know about their salary, they’ll immediately start shopping, which is a ridiculous assumption. There could be a grain of truth to this as most men did feel that their wives may start spending more if they realized that their husbands were earning well enough.
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Such prejudices are not limited to women alone. Anjala, a software professional working in a reputed firm, draws a handsome salary. She had a somewhat similar view about men who earned less than their wives. She believes that most of the times it becomes a matter of ego for men if their wives earned more than them. On the other hand, wives too assume that if their husband was to know that they earned more than them, they would try to shirk from their financial commitments.
The jury might still be open about whether or not couples should disclose their earnings to each other. In the meantime, though, there is a rising number of married couples, like Arpita and Vineeth, both of whom discuss and divide the monthly household expenses among themselves. They also set aside some amount for random expenses. However, these random expenses are never questioned by the other. This is because they believe that having worked so hard over the month, each one deserves to have a space of their own.
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So, whether or not a husband, or a wife, wishes to share his/her salary details with the other is a matter of choice. However, one thing all us would unanimously agree is that couples should work a little more on the trust factor and let go of prejudices. If a husband feels that his wife may end up spending more, he should make her understand the importance of saving for the rainy day. Similarly, a working wife can also reason things out with her husband and help him become accountable for at least those number of responsibilities that he can bear. This way they can find a middle path and a win-win situation for both!
What would you do if you were in a similar situation? Do mention in the comments below and share the wisdom.
