Children are very sensitive beings! When they cry, it is usually because they’ve been hurt either physically or emotionally. At such times, yelling at them to stop crying or resorting to violence is not the right thing to do. Instead, they need to be soothed in a calm and affectionate manner. Here are 17 things you can tell to soothe your crying child instead of yelling. But before you start, remember to take a deep breath yourself because you can only deal with such a situation with patience.
- “What happened? Did you hurt yourself, sweetheart?” – When your child cries, first and foremost try to find out the reason behind it. Only then can you deal with it.
- “It’s alright. Mommy’s here for you. You can talk to me. Tell me what’s wrong?” – Your child might take some time to open up when he/she is in a bad mood. But saying something like this will help them calm down and start sharing their problem with you.
- “You don’t like being here, is it? Let’s go somewhere else then, wherever you like.” – When you say this, your kid will realize that you are really concerned about his/her likes and dislikes.
- “Why don’t you just go out and play. All your friends are there.” – You can tell this in a situation where your child might be frustrated after trying something constantly and failing at it. It’s a good way to get him/her to time-out.
- “It’s okay if you feel this way. What’s important is that you’ve realized it.”– Sometimes, guilt makes our children cry. It could be a fight with a friend, breaking something at home, or something going wrong in your absence. Help your child come to terms and correct their actions.
- “Can I sit here next to you? Tell me how was your day?” – Maybe your kid had a really bad day. Asking your kids to share it with you will help them take the load off from their chest.
- “Don’t be scared. Mommy and daddy are here for you.”– Maybe it’s a bad dream, darkness, or just the sight of a huge dog or cat which might have scared your little one into crying. Just reassure that he/she is completely safe with you all around.
- “How can mommy and daddy help you if you don’t tell us what’s hurting?” – At times, it is really hard to get kids to talk when they get a bout of crying. It may take a while, but when you reason them with a positive statement like this, they’ll know that you are ready to listen.
- “C’mon, you’re a strong boy/girl! Now wipe your tears and gimme a smile.” – Did your child just fall off the bicycle or fell during a race and lost it? All those bruises or loss are obviously going to hurt and make them cry. An empathetic statement like this will make them channelize their inner sporting spirit.
- “I hate it too. But want to know what I got at the end of it?” – Sometimes kids can throw a fit when being compelled to do what they don’t like. Help them realize that positive actions will lead to positive results. Like, completing a task will get them a reward of their choice.
- “Let’s get you a scoop of your favorite ice cream, shall we?” – You can use this phrase particularly in a situation where your child might have a public meltdown. It’s hard to get kids to calm down in crowded public places. So, offering them some ‘soul food’ really helps.
- “Whatever it is, Momma still loves you”– No matter what the situation, say this as often as possible. Our kids need love and reassurance, which only goes on to make them confident individuals and also strengthens the parent-child bond.
- “If I were you, I too would be angry/upset. So, why not discuss it?” – Saying this will immediately make your child realize that you identify with their emotions. It’ll help you build the trust within your child to share things with you.
- “Let’s play together instead.” – Kids often end up crying when their friends don’t play with them. By asking them to play with you, you’ll make them feel wanted and happy.
- “It’s okay, it’ll get better. Give it some time.” – A friend leaving their school or a teacher they find tough to deal with can be too much of emotional pressure on your kids. Assure them that such things will settle soon.
- “Why don’t you come and give Mamma/Dada a hug.” – If both of you are working parents and don’t get to see your child enough, this is a great way to deal with their emotional outbursts. A hug always soothes and cheers them up.
- “I’m sure you can do it.” – The fear of failure can often put kids under immense stress, especially during exams. Reassuring them of their potential is a great way to help them deal with it.
As parents, you are the best people to deal with your kids when they are upset and crying. However, a little empathy will go a long way in helping your kids deal with stressful situations. So, the next time your child cries, you know what to do.