I Still Regret Not Speaking Up To The Worst Parenting I Witnessed As A Kid

I interact with kids every day because I work as a kindergarten teacher. It was my long-time passion to teach young minds, and recently I quit my corporate career to pursue this dream. When I was growing up, I always noticed that many a time, a troubled kid would have problems at home. They probably don’t feel heard. Perhaps they are neglected or, worse, abused. I felt called to dig deeper and understand a child’s psyche. So, after completing my 11th and 12th, I pursued child psychology as my undergraduate degree. It taught me a lot, and that’s when I knew I wanted to become a teacher and impart knowledge, values, and morals to kindergarteners.

I’ve been teaching for almost 7 years now, and quite often, it has made me think of the time when I was a kid. I was fortunate enough to have a loving family who valued quality time together and made family traditions an important aspect of life. We would celebrate birthdays, festivals, and achievements together. Every night, we would have dinner together, after which we would clear out the table and watch television for 30 minutes as one family. My dog Bruno was a part of this tradition too. We also had a no phone rule at the dinner table, which I hated back in the day, but when I look back at it now, it was such an essential rule.

My family and I lived in a friendly neighborhood. We visited each other’s homes often for game nights, potlucks, and barbecue parties. It was fun, and I often looked forward to it even though I was the oldest kid on the block. I was 17 years old, and my neighbors were 12 or younger. My neighbor Kevin was a timid kid. He was just 9 years old. We would play football and cricket together with the other neighbors, but he was a quiet kid. He did not talk to a lot of people, and even when we created havoc with our games, he would stand in the corner and giggle.

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One day, it was Kevin’s parents’ turn to host us, and we all met at his place. It was potluck and poker night. There was a variety of dishes prepared by all the neighbors. Chicken roast, grilled sausages, white sauce pasta, biryani, cutlets, and chaat were just a few things available. We carried a shepard’s pie and chocolate cake for the potluck. While the adults played poker, we played monopoly and were having a great time when it happened.

Kevin’s mum called him and told him to set the table. Being a shy kid, he did not greet the guests but kept his head down and obliged. Just when he was about to walk to the dinner table to set it up, his parents called him back and started mocking him. In front of all the neighbors and kids, they insulted him for not showing “good manners” and greeting the guests. It was horrifying to watch his parents tear him down instead of bringing his morale up.

They said, “Kevin just doesn’t listen to us. We’ve tried to teach him that it’s polite to greet our guests, but he does not seem to practice good manners. We are so sick of him constantly keeping his head down and refusing to make eye contact. What a disappointment.”

I was shocked when I heard this. I felt terribly sorry for little Kevin, who was weeping in the corner. The atmosphere was uncomfortable, but the adults continued with their poker. I did not say a word but wanted to stand up for little Kevin. If there is one thing I could go back to as a kid and undo, this would be it. I regret not speaking up when I saw the worst of parenting, and I often think about this incident. It’s made me a better teacher and, most importantly, a better parent to my kids.

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