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We’ve all heard about the terrible twos, but did you know it could continue to the threes, fours and fives? Toddlers can test your patience at times and they usually can’t help themselves. Most parents find it tiring and frustrating to deal with the tiny tots and all their antics at this period. Even the most docile baby can turn into a disagreeable, aggressive toddler. But why? And how do you discipline someone who loves saying “no” to all your suggestions? Unfortunately like everything else to do with parenting, there is no handbook on how to best discipline your little troublemaker. Until your child has a grasp on how to conduct themselves in socially acceptable ways, the tantrums are going to keep coming. But this doesn’t mean you can’t do anything about it. Here are a couple of temper tantrum tactics that will actually work when your little one goes beserk!
1. Attention Grabbers
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When in doubt, distract! If your little one has already started to have an outburst, you can keep a bag full of goodies that may act as the potential solution to your problem. This trick works especially well if you’re in a public place. Say for example, you’re at the mall and your child throws a tantrum because they can’t get their hands on all the candy they see. Simply pull out the fun bag and hand them their favorite toy, book or snack in case they are hungry. A good way to stop a tantrum is to redirect your child’s attention and engage them in an alternative activity.
2. Manage Your Stress Levels
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Getting a handle on your emotions is key in effectively managing your child’s tantrums. Make sure to avoid any negative behavioral actions towards your child. This doesn’t mean that we expect you to smile at your child as they scream the roof off the house but ressorting to beating and yelling at them won’t get you far either. So your job is to stay as calm and zen as possible. Employ different breathing techniques while your child throws a fit or take a time out if possible. Allow another caregiver to take over and give yourself some time and space to think rationally.
3. Reinforcing Positive Behavior To Keep Them From Acting Out
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Little ones love to focus on the positives, so use this strategy to your advantage. Rather than reprimanding them about negative behavior, show approval when they practice positive behavior. One great way to avoid or get rid of unpleasant behavior is to teach your child what kind of behavior you want them to exhibit instead. This also means leading by example and sticking to your word. If they are not allowed to yell at people, neither are you. Shouting at your child for screaming will do nothing but confuse them. Instead show them how to interact with people appropriately and how to express their concerns in socially appropriate ways.
4. Empower Your Child
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Children often resort to acting out when they feel like they have no other option, so give them one! Outbursts are often a result of pent up frustration and anger that your little one has their inability to communicate properly. So, during a tantrum try to alleviate your child’s aggravation by giving them some control over the situation. Encourage your child to use their words to express what they are feeling and what they really want. Make sure you pay attention to them and listen to them closely. You can also allow your child to make a decision by asking them simple this or that questions. For example, if they are crying because they want a couple of toys, ask them to pick one instead of five. Make it a game by asking them to eliminate one toy in each round. Allowing them some control over the situation will help them calm down quickly.
5. Monitor Their Tantrums
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Have you noticed that your child is more irritable after lunch or really cranky during the evenings? Taking note of when their tantrums occur will give you some clue as to what to do to put an end to them once and for all. For example, if your child is being ornery and very disagreeable after lunch then maybe they need to be put down for a nap or maybe it is something related to their diet. Are they consuming too much caffeine or have they eaten something to cause discomfort? Check out all the boxes before you blame your child for lashing out.
While nobody said raising a child was going to be easy, it also doesn’t need to be hard and frustrating all the time. Tantrums are normal and although it may seem like there is no end to them, this too shall pass. Your child will grow and develop and find more sophisticated and convenient ways of communicating and disagreeing with you. So just hang in there and pull these tricks out whenever you need to stop a tantrum. Happy parenting!
