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Throughout the world, the feeling of motherhood remains synonymous with feeling blessed and grateful. Most women consider motherhood as an essential part of their lives and when they finally get to live it, they naturally feel ecstatic. However, the joy of motherhood comes with its own share of pressure. Besides the obvious physiological changes, new mothers go through a lot of psychological changes as well. To make matters worse, there are always some absurd expectations and pressures on new mothers to make them fit into a particular mold. While it is often difficult to not give in, knowing the certain types of pressures that you might feel as a new mother can help. Read on to know what typical societal and self-induced pressures new mothers deal with and how you owe nothing to them.
Most Common Pressures That New Mothers Face
Here are some of the most common pressures that new mothers have to go through, almost worldwide.
1. Shed The Extra Pounds Immediately
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Well, to be fair, this is a universal problem for plus-size women everywhere. However, the expectations often get off the charts with new mothers. They come under the heavily scrutinized eyes of elders or people belonging to the same age. While it does get tiring to deal with the constant unsolicited advice on diets and routines, it is important to remember that it is perfectly normal to gain weight after pregnancy. You do not have to jump on the weight loss train simply because other people are making you feel like that is the normal thing to do. As long as you are physically healthy and comfortable, you can maintain the weight you want.
2. Make Your Baby Follow A Routine
This highly unrealistic expectation often makes new mothers feel as if they are doing something wrong if their newborn does not follow a schedule. What you need to understand is that babies cannot be bound to a routine, at least not till a certain age. That age also varies from one child to another. To expect that a new mother will instantly be able to fix a routine for their newborn is quite irrational. Babies often function on whims and it is not before a few months have passed that a pattern can be detected. Even then, there is no guarantee that the baby will keep following it for long. Therefore, as a new mother, you should not stress out if you find yourself unable to figure out a routine for your baby.
3. Always Breastfeed
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While breastfeeding is always good for the baby, in a lot of cases, new mothers remain incapable of doing the same. There can be physiological challenges like lack of production of breast milk, the mother can feel severe discomfort when the baby sucks, or the baby might find it difficult to latch itself properly, etc. There can be practical issues like lack of time or the mother might simply choose not to breastfeed. Either way, it is the mother’s choice and there should not be so much pressure around it. A lot of women feel guilty if they fail to breastfeed. However, new mothers should know that they should be the sole decision maker in this regard and whatever they deem fit for themselves and the child should be okay.
4. Keep Up Your Appearance
Another irrational expectation society often has of new mothers is how they look. It is practically impossible for the mother of a newborn to look all decked up right after giving birth. Given what the body and mind go through during and after pregnancy, the last thing a new mother should worry about is how she looks. Even though the pressure of working on your appearance mounts up, it is important to remember that no one other than you has a say on what you should look like. Maintain your looks as you want.
5. Do It All By Yourself
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Due to years of social conditioning, women often feel that it is their responsibility to handle everything on their own. This mentality makes things worse for new mothers. With their new motherly duties, they feel that they need to flawlessly continue whatever they did before motherhood came. Be it a working woman or a housewife, both feel the pressure similarly. They often do not ask for help and take it all upon themselves. However, it is important to remember that as a new mother, your primary responsibility is taking care of the child. For anything else, you are entitled to help.
Motherhood is no easy feat. With all the responsibilities it brings along, paying heed to unrealistic expectations and pressures is not a wise choice. As a mother, you know what is best for your child and yourself and you must stick to that; no matter what others say. What are some pressures you felt when you became a mother? Let us know in the comment section.
