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Every mother knows the struggle of being called after every second at every point of the day. No matter whether you’re trying to cook, do some laundry or are on an important work call, your kids just can’t stop calling for you. And God forbid you ignore them, that only makes it a million times worse. And although you once probably prayed for them to call you mommy, mama or mom, when they were a baby, now all you want them to do is stop! But why are your children constantly calling for you and how do you get them to stop so that you can finally enjoy some peace of mind? If you’d like these questions answered then you’ve come to the right place. Read this article and find out more!
Consider Your Child’s Age
We’re sure your teenager isn’t the one who is calling for you day in and out. The smaller your kids are, the less independent they are. So you need to consider your kid’s age while dealing with this situation. If you’ve got a toddler or a preschooler at home, then them following you around and asking for your attention constantly is rather normal. This is because they see their mother and associate this with getting their needs met, even if it is just showing you their drawing of the sun or how they can blow bubbles.
Kids at this age also don’t understand the concept of work and can’t rationalize why you wouldn’t want to just hang out with them instead. So if you’ve been working from home or are trying to get as many chores done in a short amount of time, good luck. Kids especially ask for their mom incessantly when they are upset. They know that you will comfort them and so they will seek you out until you acknowledge them. But that doesn’t mean that you are always going to be in the position to drop everything you’re doing and pay attention to them, especially if the reason they are asking for you isn’t important to begin with. So how do you put an end to it? Well, there are a couple of things that you can do!
Look At Everyone’s Role
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In any family dynamic, parents take on different roles. They play to their strengths and care for their kids in different ways. And due to this, kids are often used to asking one particular parent or caregiver to do something specific for them or meet a need they have. They will not ask their dad for the same thing as they do the mother. Each parent caters to a different need and so the child knows exactly who to seek out. But in certain cases when the child does approach the father for something, he might defer to the mother, giving the kid the impression that the mother is the only person they can go to regardless of the needs they have. After all, why waste your time on the middle man when all the decisions are made by one person alone? And this leaves the mother taking care of every request as the other adults stand by. This just won’t do. Your partner has to take a proactive part in taking care of the child so that mom is not the only one handling every inquiry and problem.
Give Mom A Break
It’s time to empower the other adults at home and give poor moms a break. It’s important to show your child what to expect from you and your partner as parents. This may mean creating easy to read boundaries. You can even come up with a light system if that’s what will help. Tell your kids that green means you are available for any unserious concerns, yellow means they’ll need to wait a few minutes and red means that they come to you only when something is absolutely important and unavoidable. You can also tell them that red means that they go to the other parent for whatever is nagging them. This way, when the mom is busy and the child is distressed, the adults agree on who’s incharge and will take over.
Connect And Have Compassion
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You can always have a short family meeting and have a discussion. You can start with all the positive things that happened this week and then you can bring up what you expect your kid to do when you’re busy and there are other adults who can help. You can also have your kids write down their questions so that you can get back to them later.
Being a mom is the hardest job in the world and it never stops. But sometimes even moms need a break and need help when your child can’t seem to stop calling for you. So make sure that you have people to support you and carry the load!
