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Welcoming a new baby into the world is a journey filled with joy, challenges, and a whirlwind of emotions. As friends, family, and well-wishers, our words carry great impact when interacting with a new mother. While our intentions may be positive, there are certain phrases that can inadvertently add stress or discomfort to her experience. In this article, we’ll explore a range of topics to steer clear of when conversing with a new mom. From sleep advice to breastfeeding commentary, understanding what not to say can foster a more supportive and empathetic environment during this transformative time. Read on to know more!
1. Sleep When The Baby Sleeps
The seemingly well-intentioned advice of “sleep when the baby sleeps” is often easier said than done. While the idea of catching up on sleep sounds appealing, the reality for many new mothers involves a myriad of tasks to complete during those precious moments. Instead of offering this suggestion, consider offering assistance in other ways that could allow her to rest, such as helping with household chores or watching the baby while she takes a brief break.
2. Did You Not Want A Natural Childbirth
Every mother’s birthing experience is deeply personal and can be influenced by various factors. The decision to have a natural or medicated childbirth is unique to each individual, and it’s important to respect and support her choice. Instead of questioning her decisions, inquire about her birthing experience with curiosity and respect, focusing on her well-being and the joy of her baby’s arrival.
3. Did You Not Want To Breastfeed? … Don’t You Know It’s Better?
Breastfeeding is a personal choice influenced by numerous factors, including a mother’s health, lifestyle, and circumstances. Pressuring a new mother about her choice can lead to feelings of guilt and inadequacy. Rather than imposing your views, lend an empathetic ear and offer support, regardless of the feeding method she chooses.
4. Is He/She On A Schedule?
Babies don’t adhere to strict schedules, especially in their early months. The pressure to establish a rigid routine can create unnecessary stress for new mothers. Instead, ask how her days are going and if there’s anything you can do to help ease her daily responsibilities.
5. You Think This Is Bad? Just Wait Until He Crawls/Walks/Is Teething/Is Running/Learns The Word No/Is A Pre-Teen/Is A Teen/Etc.
While seasoned parents may offer these comments with a dash of humor, they can inadvertently undermine a new mother’s current challenges. Each phase of parenthood comes with its own set of trials and joys. Instead of diminishing her current struggles, acknowledge her current journey and offer words of encouragement for the present moment.
6. Enjoy Every Second!
Although well-intentioned, the phrase “enjoy every second” can unintentionally add pressure to cherish every moment, even the difficult ones. Parenting is a rollercoaster of emotions, and it’s normal to experience a mix of joy and challenges. Instead, offer empathy and understanding when she shares her feelings and experiences.
7. Let’s Just Assume, If You Are Talking To A New Mom…
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Before engaging in conversations with a new mother, it’s crucial to consider her emotional state and potential sensitivity. Pregnancy and childbirth can bring about a range of emotions, from elation to exhaustion, and every woman’s experience is different. Approach conversations with empathy and an open heart, ensuring that your words uplift and support rather than inadvertently cause discomfort.
Things To Say To A New Mother
Conversing with a new mother involves not only avoiding sensitive topics but also offering words of encouragement, empathy, and support. Here are some meaningful things to say, along with relevant subtopics:
1. Compliments And Encouragement
- “You’re doing an incredible job as a mom, and I admire your dedication.”
- “You’ve got this, and you’re handling everything so well.”
- “Your love and care for your baby shine through in everything you do.”
2. Validation Of Emotions
- “It’s okay to have ups and downs; parenthood is full of both.”
- “Your feelings are completely valid, and I’m here to listen.”
- “You’re not alone in experiencing the challenges of motherhood.”
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3. Offers Of Help And Assistance
- “Let me know if you need a hand with anything, whether it’s chores or just some company.”
- “I’m here to support you in any way you need, whether it’s babysitting or running errands.”
- “Don’t hesitate to ask for help when you need it.”
Navigating conversations with new mothers requires sensitivity, understanding, and respect for their unique journey. By avoiding potentially hurtful or unsolicited remarks, we can create a supportive and empowering environment for new moms as they embark on this transformative chapter of their lives. Let’s embrace the opportunity to lend a listening ear, offer genuine support, and celebrate the joys and challenges of motherhood together. In doing so, we contribute to a community that uplifts and empowers new mothers during this extraordinary phase of their lives. Let us know in the comments your experience as a new mother!
