Marriages are made in heaven! Or is it we mortals who make it so? Watching couples grow old together makes rest of the herd wonder what their secret is, and how they made their relationship work for, what seems to be, an eternity. These couples seem to defy standoffs, momentary arguments, tiffs and ego clashes; just about anything that could mar a pleasant relationship. How do they do this? You will be surprised to know that there is no magic or a closely guarded secret code that makes a couple happy every single day, rather it’s a generous mix of some patience, common sense and neat ideas that keep your relationship going every moment, every day. And, here’re a few more ideas:
1. Warm Embraces:
To hug your spouse, the first thing when you see him/her in the morning, or before going to work, after coming from work, before going to sleep and in quiet times is mentally and emotionally stimulating. A hug for a good three minutes will conquer any resentment you must have felt towards your partner or it will help you overcome a situation that would have got you upset with each other. Warm hugs are warm after all.
2. Respecting Each Other’s Time And Space:
Yes, you lead your lives together, but that doesn’t mean that you have to be up and about only for each other. Each of you must have respective hobbies or interests, each of you might have things that you need to and might want to do independent of each other. Allowing your better half to pursue his/her interests, while you catch up with the show, you missed the other day might just be the perfect way of feeling fulfilled once you return to each other.
3. Being Generous With Each Other:
Don’t shower each other with presents. Kind gestures would do much to feel cared for. Volunteering to help in the kitchen while you need to attend to your baby, or dashing off to fetch milk even before you could ask to announce cereals for breakfast. Asking you to catch up with sleep two nights in a row while he takes over calming your baby, are ways you could show generosity towards each other.
4. Being Good Listeners:
If a partner, or anyone for that matter, says “hmm…” irrelevantly, you know that he isn’t listening. Paying attention when your partner speaks is crucial in keeping the relationship going. When you listen well, your partner feels important. The more you listen, the more your partner is empowered to talk and open up to you. You never know what your partner had bottled up all along! In fact, a good listener will have least talking to do.
5. Staying Connected Wherever You Are:
We spend more time with our coworkers than with our spouse. Think about it! Honestly, we have more hours at work than at home. So one way to stay connected with your spouse telling him/her that you care is by calling (short calls), texting, sharing pictures from your workstation or cafeteria, or sharing jokes, or tales of your kids are ways of staying connected other while not in proximity to each other. We have technology at fingertips now, so why not plug into your mobile phone or use social media (of course, so long as this one isn’t firewalled at your workstation) that you do love each other.
6. Surprising Each Other:
Just recall the book your partner had long wanted to read but never chanced upon. Why not surprise him/her with that book when you meet in the evening! More often than not, it’s not the lavish desires that are as fulfilling as small things of life.
7. Tuning Into Each Other’s Thoughts:
Couples who gel well don’t have to communicate much. They might not be vocal about their thoughts and yet gauge what your better half is thinking. Making eye contact is one way to mirror out your concerns, apprehensions, desires, emotions, and care for each other. You can’t be too busy to avoid reflecting on your thoughts.
8. Having Fun Together:
There is always room for this one. Movies, dining out together, leisure trips and activities are never a pass. Paint the town red as you do silly things together.
9. Being Forgiving:
To err is human, and it couldn’t be less true about couples. Each of you has a distinct personality and differing opinions; salted with some ego. So, it is unlikely that you couldn’t differ or trespass on each other’s thoughts at times. Be forgiving and get over your past altercations. It will leave you laughing together at the end of the day.
Making a relationship last for a lifetime with the same spark that kicked it off at the first instance is challenging, but it is certainly not impossible. You just have to stay connected, and these nine ways to do so every single day are simple ways to dwell, happily ever after, with each other.