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As a parent, your main goal in life is to make your children as competent as possible. This means teaching them values and compassion, teaching them to be polite and resilient. But one key factor that you cannot miss out on is motivation. All parents want their kids to be successful and happy with their lives and in attaining this, motivation is instrumental. Especially in this day and age where children are losing interest in anything that doesn’t captivate them in a matter of seconds. How do you motivate your child to find interests, hobbies and goals that they are passionate about? And how do you get them to stick with it? If you’d like to help your child improve their skills, techniques, and mindset then here’s a popular 3 step strategy for doing just that. Read on to know more!
1. Constantly Catch Your Child Doing Something Right
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Reinforcing the positive behavior you want to see is a way more effective strategy than reprimanding your child negatively when you feel as though they have not lived up to your expectations. Keep in mind that publicly correcting someone is the lowest form of human emotion—shame, an emotion that no one wants to feel. When you publicly shame your child you put them in a negative headspace. But when you privately shame your kid you put them in a defensive mindset. Both can be detrimental to your relationship with them. But this doesn’t mean that you can never correct your kids, far from it!
Consider using the bank account analogy to explain this concept. Imagine your child as a bank account. Each time you catch them doing something great, it’s like making a deposit into the account. On the other hand, when you need to correct them, it’s like making a withdrawal. It’s easier for your child to accept those occasional withdrawals if there’s already a healthy balance in their emotional account. Furthermore, actively seeking out the positive aspects in your kids is a wonderful practice. It shows them that you appreciate their efforts to improve, encouraging the development of positive behavior. By recognizing and acknowledging the best in your child, you motivate and support their growth.
2. Choices, Not Ultimatums
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Ultimatums are so easy to hand out so we’re not surprised as to why they may be popular in your household. Telling your child to eat their food or else they won’t get dessert and telling them to get in the car if they want their nintendo is a sure fire way of getting them to comply. But did you know this full proof method has consequences? You may think that giving your child an ultimatum is how you stay in control and ensure that they cultivate good habits. But let’s be honest, by the time you resort to handing out an ultimatum, you’ve lost all control. Besides, ordering your child about by taking away or withholding the things that they enjoy is not how you teach them to do the right thing. Instead give them a choice. Ask them if they’d like to get in the car in 10 minutes and let them know the consequences of being late. Now allow them to choose to do the right thing. Once your child realizes that you trust them enough to make the right decisions, they will be motivated to follow through with correct behavior. No more ultimatums needed!
3. Monkey See, Monkey Do!
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When it comes to kids, show don’t tell. Your child is way more influenced by observing what you do than they are listening to what you tell them to do. So, if you’d like them to stay motivated, keep up with hobbies and follow through, show them how it’s done! Kids mimic their parents from their attitude, mannerisms and so much more. So, when it comes to teaching them how to stay motivated, lead by example. Take up a hobby you enjoy and make time for it. If you want them to find purpose in life by establishing a good work-life balance, it’s time to start doing what you’d like your kids to do. Put your phone away when you come home and spend quality time with the kids. Prioritize being present at work when you have to be. This is easier said than done, but you have to start somewhere. The point is that everyone has room for improvement in some area in their life and as long as you are motivated to improve it, your child will pick up on this trait and mimic it in their own life experiences.
Now that you know the 3 step strategy to keep your child motivated through life’s hurdles and challenges, they are sure to be unstoppable. So, did this article motivate you to do better as well? Let us know in the comments below. Happy parenting!
