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We understand the need to settle for the perfect name, one that is unique and special. However, some parents can take this up a notch by giving their child a name that is borderline crazy! Naming your child is the first step to giving them an identity — it sticks with them for life! Even if they do plan on changing their name later, they’ll never forget the hell you put them through if you give them a ridiculous name.
In trying to be cool and different, some parents majorly screw up. The names they choose surely make us laugh, but guess who isn’t laughing? Their kids, of course! Read on to find out what we’re talking about:
1. Amillion
Sounds familiar? Maybe because it’s derived from the words “a million”. So we get that the child is one in a million and the most precious thing to happen to them, but why ruin all that with a name so ridiculous? It is one of the weirdest names a parent has given their child, and we’re sure the little one will find a million reasons to be mad at them!
2. Moon Unit
No, we didn’t make this one up — it happens to be the name of rockstar Frank Zappa’s oldest daughter. We understand that “moon face” and “moonshine” are cute names to call your child, but “moon unit”? That’s a weird one!
3. Lucifer
Children are often associated with angels and cherubs — they’re cute and innocent enough to be angelic, after all! But what provoked the parents to name their child after the devil himself? Did they feel their child was an evil spawn? Or was it because they like all things dark? We’ll never know what the thought process behind this choice was, but we know that this baby’s social life has gone to hell!
4. Kale
Kale is a vegetable. Why would anyone in their right mind name their child after a leafy green veggie? Was this their attempt at advocating all things vegan? Or was it because they loved the vegetable so much they decided to name their child after it? We understand that kale is a healthy food choice, but definitely not a healthy name choice!
5. Yoga
Yoga is all the rage these days — the benefits it offers for body, mind, and soul are endless. People worldwide are exploring what yoga has to offer, and they love it. But we doubt that they love it so much that they’d name their child after it — except for some who went ahead and named their child Yoga. Or did they confuse it with Yoda? Either way, both aren’t an excellent choice for your little one.
6. Sanity
Parenting is a tough job. It requires you to put your tiny human before all things, including yourself, and at times, this can be hard. It can drive you insane. But can it drive you insane enough to name your child Sanity? Apparently yes.
7. Audio Science
Again, we aren’t kidding — this is the name of a real person. Actress Shannyn Sossamon named her child Audio Science after her boyfriend chose the two words from a dictionary. When asked about it, she said they wanted good words to name their child instead of conventional names. No points for creativity… or effort, seriously.
8. Fanny
Fanny would have been a cute name if it didn’t mean “a person’s backside”. Also, it refers to a woman’s private parts in some regions. Being called Fanny can be more of an insult than a name if you go by what it means! We can all agree that the parents should have spent a little more time understanding the meaning behind this moniker.
9. Uranus
We understand the love that people have for the universe and outer space. There are so many common names inspired by celestial bodies, such as Jupiter, Celeste, Sirius, Venus, Ariel, Astrid, and Aurora, to name a few. With so many options, why any parent would choose to name their child Uranus is beyond us! This child is sure to be the butt of many jokes, that’s for sure!
10. Sundae
Most of us have a sweet tooth, and nothing can be more satisfying than a lovely Sundae in the summer! Ice cream can make anyone happy, but being named after one won’t exactly bring a smile to your face. Especially if you’re the one who is called Sundae.
11. Rogue
A dishonest or mischievous person, one who is not exactly pleasant — that’s what a rogue means. There is nothing positive about this name! We feel terrible for the child who has to carry this for life!
We’re going to say it — it’s not cool to give your child a disastrous name. There are ways to change your name legally in the long run, but your child will not forget that you named them something crazy. It is best to think long and hard about what you name your child, to prevent putting them in distress! Have you come across other ridiculous names? Share them with us in the comments below!
