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Can you imagine calling your parents by their first name? That probably wouldn’t go well. One of the biggest concerns you might have as a parent is to teach your children to have respect for people, especially their elders. Learning how to be polite and courteous is important but keep in mind that some rules may not be applicable to your little one’s generation. As shocking as it may be, calling you by your name instead of a formal title like mum or dad can be a way in which your child expresses their love for you. As long as respect is shown through actions, are formal titles really necessary when it comes to family members? Here are a couple of reasons why your child may refer to you by your first name and what that means!
1. Today’s Children Have Different Morals And Beliefs
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Lately there has been a huge generation gap when it comes to the philosophy of respecting their elders, and that’s not necessarily a bad thing. Although the concept of respect is deeply rooted in culture and education given by parents to their children, things have changed drastically due to external factors. This doesn’t mean that kids these days are disrespectful to their elders, it is just that they show this respect in different ways.
You may see this in the way that your kids approach elders and talk to them freely. They are comfortable around their teachers. They are confident enough to express themselves and share their opinions with older siblings and relatives and communicate well. Your little one is not intimidated by people just because they happen to be older than them and we for one applaud that! They believe that respect is mainly shown through actions and not words. So even if they may call you by name, they may respect you a lot.
2. They Are Looking For A Casual Friend-Like Relationship With Their Parents
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Certain children express a desire to address their parents by their first names, seeking a more casual and friend-like rapport. They observe that they address their closest friends by their first names, individuals with whom they openly share their thoughts and experiences. For these children, using their parents’ first names is seen as an initial step towards forging a friend-like connection. This can serve as a positive avenue to strengthen the bond with your child.
3. They Are Playing The Mimic Game
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Your child might be using your first name instead of “mom” or “dad” because that’s what they often hear in the household. Consider this: if you have a nickname that your partner frequently uses to address you, your child will tend to mimic it and incorporate it into their vocabulary. Children naturally seek to emulate their parents and other adults around them, as a way to connect with you and gain your approval. It’s also their means of demonstrating that they are absorbing the happenings in their environment.
If you and your partner frequently address each other by your first names in front of the kids, it’s possible that this might encourage them to do the same. So, although you might initially interpret your child’s use of your first name as a sign of disrespect, their intention is quite the opposite. Rather than reacting with anger, it can be more productive to explain to them why using “mom” or “dad” is more appropriate if that’s your preference for how they address you.
4. Your Kids Are Dipping Their Toes Into Adulthood
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This aligns with the common behavior of children imitating adults. Drawing from what they’ve observed, addressing others by their first name is a practice typically associated with adults. The motivation behind their desire to call you by your first name is their aspiration to mature quickly and replicate the behaviors of their parents and admired adults. They aim to adhere to all the “grown-up” rules, and, in their eyes, addressing older individuals by their first names is one of those rules. Using your first name is like their gateway to the adult world they aspire to be part of.
5. Some Parents Actually Like It
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If you come from a time where calling your parents by their name is taboo, then this might actually be exciting for you. It’s fun and can make you feel closer to your kids. And there is nothing wrong about that!
There are all kinds of parents and all kinds of kids who show their affection in different ways. If your child calls you by your first name, this can be a positive sign. So take it as a compliment and enjoy it! Would you let your child call you by your first name? Let us know in the comments section!
